Mother dearest
by JorixBade
Summary: Jade's life crumbles when she has to move in with her estranged mother, leaving all the comfort of her former life behind and having to become the grown up in a toxic environment that will push her to edge of her sanity. Her shiny new life and her job at a nightclub might take a toll, not only on her physical and mental wellbeing, but on her relationships and her future as well.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! **

**That didn't take long, did it? ;)**

**This story is pretty sad but most of the ones I write are, so I guess you'll like it **

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"Hey there!" Tori said excitedly as she approached her friends in the hallway.

"Hi Tori" Beck responded nicely.

"What are you guys doing?" She asked.

"Are you blind?" Jade asked back annoyed. "We are buying sodas from the soda machine" she said in a condescending tone.

"I know, I…never mind" Tori said to avoid an unnecessary argument.

"Why isn't this working?" Jade asked angrily and kicked the machine.

"Hey, easy…you're gonna break it" Beck said.

"Don't patronize me!" She responded upset and he looked at her confused by her reaction.

"Someone's grumpy" Andre said and took a sip of soda.

"That someone is always grumpy" Rex said and Jade glared at Robbie annoyed so he looked away.

"What's your problem?" Tori asked confused.

"I don't have a problem" Jade said coldly. "The stupid machine doesn't work" She said and Beck sighed as he bought the soda himself and then handed it to her.

"There it is" Beck said.

"Are you trying to make me feel dumb?" She asked.

"What? No" He responded. "What's going on? Anything you wanna talk about?"

"No" She said coldly.

"You seem upset" Cat commented and Jade rolled her eyes.

"You know what? I'm done talking to you" She said and simply walked away so they looked at each other disconcertedly.

"What's the matter with her?" Tori asked.

"I don't know, she's acting strange…I left her at home after her birthday dinner and she didn't call me all weekend and now she is like this" Beck commented and took a breath. "I'll see you guys later" He added and went after her.

Jade was walking towards the parking lot and Beck saw her, so he ran towards her "Wait, where are you going?" He questioned

"None of your business" She responded.

"We still have class" Beck added.

"Then go and leave me alone" Jade said annoyed and looked at her confused.

"Jade, what's the problem? Something is up with you" He commented trying to remain calm and not fight with her "Just tell me"

"I can't do this right now, just leave me alone" Jade responded.

"No, I won't let you go until you tell me what's going on" Beck said. "This isn't normal, you don't pick up my calls all weekend and now this, what is happening?"

"It's not your problem" Jade said coldly.

"Your problems are my problems, we are a couple…that's what couples do" Beck affirmed.

"I really don't need this now" Jade said and turned around, so he rolled his eyes and stopped her from getting in her car.

"You are not leaving until you tell me what's keeping you like this" He said.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Jade screamed at him and he looked at her even more confused, so she looked down regretting it.

"You don't have to yell" He said coldly.

"I'm…sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you" Jade said sincerely and took a breath as she held his hands.

"Babe, what's going on?" Beck questioned again.

"I'm having some issues with my dad, that's all" Jade commented and he nodded.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" He asked but she shook her head.

"No, I need to figure this out on my own so just please give me some space, I want to be alone" Jade said and Beck could see she meant it, so even though he wanted to support her, he decided to give her what she wanted.

"Okay, call me if you need anything" He said and gave her a peck, she simply nodded, got in her car and drove away. She only wanted to lock herself up and pretend her life hadn't been turned upside down in matter of hours, but she couldn't hide from reality.

Jade didn't want Beck or her friends to realize what was happening so she just played it cool with them but she avoided them as much as she could, it was hard sometimes because she had to see Beck but she didn't want to break up with him, although he didn't know what was happening in her life, just having his company sometimes made her feel better.

"Hey mom" Jade said as she walked into her mother's small apartment and went to the kitchen to leave the groceries "Mom?" She said again but no one responded so she walked to the living room and found her mother on the sofa; there were several beer bottles on the floor and a plastic bag full of different pills on the table.

"Are you kidding me?" Jade said to herself and rolled her eyes "MOM!" She exclaimed angrily and started slapping her face to focus her attention.

"Oh hi" Her mother, whose name was Lorraine, muttered and smiled.

"Wake up" Jade demanded angrily. "What is this shit? We talked about it!" She exclaimed as she grabbed the bag.

"I…I'm sorry" Lorraine said still trying to stay conscious but she was too high.

"Where did you even get the money to buy these?" Jade asked confused and then her eyes wide opened, she immediately turned around and ran to her bedroom. She opened her closet, grabbed her small jewelry box and opened it only to confirm her mother had taken her money. "No, no, no, FUCK!" She screamed full of rage and threw the box away.

Jade was so full of anger and frustration that she only stabbed the side of her bed with her scissors, she couldn't deal with that situation any longer and it'd only been a few days. She stayed in her room for a while and then went back to the living room, her mother was simply watching TV and smoking, but she seemed a little more sober.

"So….Mom" Jade said and folded her arms. "You spent the money my dad gave me on drugs, you really spent six months' worth of rent and food in a bag of pills and the shiny new bottles of alcohol in the kitchen" She said coldly and her mother looked at her.

"Jesus, it's no big deal" Lorraine said annoyed and smoked again "Sorry"

"You're sorry? Yeah, like that will get us another month in this shithole!" Jade responded and shook her head. "The landlord is coming today and now we can't pay him, what are you gonna do about that? Say you're sorry for being a junkie?" She asked coldly.

"Why don't you call your dad and go back to his big fucking house then?" Lorraine asked.

"Oh believe me, I tried but dad is done with me, he says I'm eighteen and no longer his problem, hence my presence in this place" Jade responded. "He gave me the money so I would survive six months while I got settled but it's been a few days and now it's all gone!"

"Your father has always been a selfish bastard" Lorraine said.

"Bold of you to say that considering I grew up without a mother because you were too busy snorting your life away" Jade said and Lorraine stood up slowly, she turned to Jade and took a breath.

"You've always preferred your father over me" Lorraine said coldly. "And look where that got you, he kicked you out because he doesn't care about you and you still say I'm the bad one?" She asked and smiled "Wake up" She said and tapped Jade's forehead before leaving the room.

A few hours later the doorbell finally rang and Jade closed her eyes in frustration, she'd not come up with a good idea to get money yet and she was going to have to face the consequences. Lorraine was asleep and Jade knew she wasn't exactly helpful anyway, so she had to be the grown up.

"Hello" Jade said politely and the man stepped inside without even asking.

"Hey doll, so you're actually staying uh? Lucky me" He said cynically, and she stared at him coldly. "I came to get the money"

"Yeah, about that…" Jade said and took a breath. "I was robbed" she informed.

"Robbed? Where?" He asked.

"On my way home from the ATM, a man took my purse and ran away" Jade informed. "I lost the money then but I will get it again, I just need some time"

"This ain't a shelter sweetheart, I need the money now" The man said coldly.

"I don't have it now, just give me a week please" Jade said and he looked at her from top to bottom.

"I can take another form of payment, ya know?" He said and she looked to the side annoyed.

"You'll have the money, I just need a few days" Jade insisted.

"What guarantee do I have? Do you even have a job?" The man questioned.

"I have a car and it'll be up for sale today" She informed. "I'll also get a job so there shall be no problems with future payments"

"Very well, I'll give you a week but if you don't pay, you're both out" He informed and she nodded.

"Thank you" Jade said coldly and he smirked as he left.

Jade managed to sell her car the next day and she went to her landlord's apartment to pay the rent, she didn't want him to go into her apartment again. She simply gave him the money and put the rest of it in her bank account; she'd had to cheapen her car in order to sell it quickly, but it was enough money to get her through a few weeks if she managed it correctly.

Jade had hoped she'd find a job before running out of money, but weeks went by and her bank account shrunk dramatically. She was close to the end of the month and once again she didn't have enough money to pay the rent. Lorraine wasn't useful because all those years she'd been living off Mr. West's mercy, but he'd cut her funds too, so the burden fell on Jade's shoulders.

Beck and the gang barely ever saw Jade, she only showed up to class and then disappeared, they hadn't bumped into her at the mall or any of the places she usually frequented. Beck had tried to stay close to her but she'd drifted away, she didn't want him to find out the truth about her new reality, Jade had always told everyone her mother was dead and she didn't want them to ever find out she wasn't, it was embarrassing.

"Mom, listen to me…" Jade said upset "We have to pay rent in three days, what are we gonna do?" She asked and Lorraine smoked her cigarette.

"We need money obviously, all thanks to your fucking father" Lorraine said. "I haven't worked in years, no one wants me" She said annoyed as she shook her foot anxiously and drank up a glass of whisky.

"Especially not if you show up high or drunk" Jade said annoyed.

"Why don't YOU get a job then, Miss perfect?" Lorraine questioned.

"You think I'm not trying? I can't find anything that will allow me to go to school, I could take a part time in a coffee shop but it's not enough" She responded and Lorraine thought about it, she looked at Jade from top to bottom and sighed.

"I have an idea, it might work because you are pretty" Lorraine said and Jade looked at her confused. "An old friend of mine works in the club down the street, maybe she could give you something"

"Are you seriously asking me to work in a nightclub?" Jade questioned surprised and her mother rolled her eyes.

"What is it? Not good enough for a former rich girl like you?" Lorraine asked sarcastically "Relax, you can be a waitress or something, I'll call my friend and you'll go see her and you'll take whatever she has for you, do you understand?"

"I don't want to work in a nightclub" Jade said "So no, don't even bother" she added annoyed.

"I mean, I have another idea but you might not like it" Lorraine said. "The landlord really likes you, I've seen the way he looks at you, we could live here for free…" she commented and Jade stared at her shocked, she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"You are disgusting" Jade said clearly angry and sadly, she couldn't believe her mother would ask her to pimp herself out.

"Those are the options, hon" Lorraine said.

"Yeah? And why don't you do it instead? What would you do if I weren't here?" Jade asked and Lorraine sighed as she smoked.

"I'd do it myself but I don't think it'd be as effective" She commented "I mean I can do it, I don't care but then you'd have to find another place to live because I am not gonna keep your ungrateful ass here for free and the street is rough, especially for pretty girls like you" She said and Jade could feel the tears coming so she took a breath to remain calm, she couldn't believe that woman was her mother.

"How can you do this to your own daughter?" Jade asked disappointedly and Lorraine rolled her eyes.

"If you are gonna start crying, please go to your room because I'm not in the mood" She responded and Jade looked down. She had no choice but to stay, she'd already begged her father to let her come back but he'd refused and she really had nowhere to go, she couldn't afford to rent anywhere except in that place and she'd thought about moving in with Beck but that wasn't a long term option either because it wasn't his house in the end, so she was stuck there with Lorraine.

"Don't worry Lorraine, I won't cry" Jade said coldly.

"So, take your pick darling" Lorraine said and Jade stared at her upset.

"I'm not sleeping that pig" She informed.

"The club it is then, I'll call my friend" Lorraine said and left the room.

Jade simply took a breath and tried to remain calm but she was scared, she felt lost and alone, more than ever before. She needed Beck's support, she needed him to hug her and tell her everything would be alright, but she didn't want him or anyone to find out the truth, so she had to suck it up and face her new reality all by herself.

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**I hope you enjoyed the first chapter :)**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Hello, how can I help you?" A middle-aged lady asked as Jade stepped into the nightclub nervously.

"I'm Jade, Lorraine's daughter" Jade informed and the woman smiled.

"Oh my god, I haven't seen you since you were little" The woman, whose name was Ana, said and hugged her so Jade stood there awkwardly "How old are you now?" She asked.

"Eighteen" She responded. "My mom said you'd have a job for me" Jade commented and the woman rolled her eyes.

"I told Lorraine this was a bad idea, I don't know why she sent you" Ana commented.

"Do you have a job or not?" Jade asked impatiently.

"You know what this place is, right?" Ana asked back.

"I'm not blind, it's a strip club" Jade said coldly "But I was hoping to be a waitress maybe?" she asked hoping for the best.

"Unfortunately, we don't have vacancies for waitresses" Ana said and Jade looked down, she needed the job right away, so she sighed and turned back to the woman.

"I can…dance too" Jade added and the woman smiled sadly.

"But you don't wanna do that" Ana responded and Jade took a breath.

"Listen lady-" She started but Ana cut her off.

"Ana, you can call me Ana" She clarified.

"Ana, I need a job and I'm kind of against the clock here" Jade explained annoyed.

"Why don't you take a part time elsewhere?" Ana asked.

"Because it's not enough and I need money to pay rent and survive" She commented coldly "But I don't want to quit school, I don't plan on living like this forever" Jade informed and Ana looked at her a little surprised.

"Rent? You mean your mother is making work to pay for her rent?" Ana asked upset.

"That's Lorraine for ya" Jade simply said "But you are her friend, aren't you? You must know her" She added, Ana seemed nice but she was Lorraine's friend and that made Jade automatically dislike her.

"I never thought she'd do this, you shouldn't even be working right now" Ana responded.

"Listen 'Ana', I don't know how you know Lorraine but anyone who's ever met her knows she is not a very motherly woman" Jade responded coldly.

"We met back in college, we were close friends back then and believe it or not, she wasn't the person you know, she was happy when she got pregnant with you and her life was good, everything seemed to be going great for her" Ana explained "But then she changed…"

"By changed you mean she became a junkie and neglected me" Jade clarified and Ana sighed.

"Why are you with her now?" She asked confused "I thought you lived with your father"

"He doesn't like me anymore than she does and he kicked me out when I turned eighteen" She commented upset trying to hide the fact it actually hurt her

"He did what?" Ana asked shocked.

"Yeah, so I have to live with her now and I don't have much of a choice, I need the job" Jade added.

"Oh my god, honey, I'm so sorry" Ana said mortified and Jade rolled her eyes.

"I bet you are" Jade responded coldly "But I didn't come here to tell you how sad my life is, so if you don't have a job for me, I'm leaving" she said annoyed and turned around but Ana stopped her.

"Wait…" She said and held her arm.

"What?" Jade asked annoyed, she wasn't in the mood to deal with anyone, especially not one of Lorraine's friends.

"How about being a hostess?" Ana suggested "You would be fully dressed and it's the only thing I can give you other than the dancing spots" She commented and Jade looked at her surprised "You'd be here from 9pm to 3am and the pay is not outstanding but I'm sure it'll help you"

"Really?" Jade asked gladly.

"Yeah, I mean…anything I can do to help you, honey" Ana responded and Jade smiled.

"Thank you" She said sincerely.

"Great, so it's done…We'll start training tonight"

Ana was the manager of the club and she was a nice caring lady, she trained Jade for a week and then she started working officially. Jade managed to earn enough money to pay the bills and she made sure to never leave it at home because she wasn't going to let Lorraine use it on drugs.

Jade's job was fairly easy, she just had to greet the guests and guide them to their table; she assigned a waitress for them and went back to her desk. She usually had to put up with harassment from the customers, but she'd learned to just fake a smile and leave. Everything was going well but she was always tired because she could barely get any sleep and it was starting to show.

"So, you've been here for over two months, how do you feel?" Ana asked as she and Jade had dinner in a restaurant near the club.

"It's alright, not my dream job but it pays the bills" Jade admitted, she'd grown very close to Ana because she was the only motherly figure she had in her life. She couldn't understand how someone like her could be friends with Lorraine, because they were complete opposites.

"I get that" Ana said. "And how's your mom? Still using?" She asked and Jade looked down.

"Yeah" She admitted. "I don't give her any money but she finds a way to get the drugs, the other day I found her blowing a guy in our living room" she said ashamedly.

"Dear god" Ana said and held her hand. "I'm so sorry you have to go through this, love"

"It's my mother so…" Jade said and sighed.

"Yes, but she chose her path and you don't have to put up with it" Ana affirmed.

"I don't have a choice" She commented. "I told you my dad kicked me out of his life and either I live with my mother or on the street, I haven't found another place I can afford so I'm stuck in that hellhole"

"What about your boyfriend?" Ana asked.

"He doesn't know about this" Jade responded "And even if he did, I can't live with him either, it's his parents' house and I can stay there sometimes but it's not a long-term option" She added and Ana sighed.

"What Lorraine is doing to you is disgusting, you're her child" Ana commented.

"I don't even think she sees me as her daughter, she is angry I left her for my dad when I was little" Jade commented.

"She's been using since before your dad left her and she continued to do it while you were with her, so no wonder he took you away, it was the responsible choice" Ana said.

"How old was I when he took me away? I don't really remember much from that time" Jade commented.

"You must've been five or six" Ana responded "And it took your father long enough, he should've taken you when he left, you lived alone with Lorraine for four years"

"I did?" Jade asked surprised and Ana nodded mortified.

"I visited you a few times and it wasn't nice, you lived basically alone because she was always high or drunk or she had men over so she locked you up in the room, one time I remember I found you crying and trying to wake her because you were hungry but she was passed out on the couch" Ana commented "I called your father several times but he and I ended up in bad terms, so he never picked up my calls"

"Then how did he learn about it?" Jade questioned "He never talked to me about that"

"Maybe he visited you too, it didn't take a genius to realize that was child endangerment, I never called the cops only because I didn't want your mother to get in trouble and it was a mistake I've regretted for years" Ana confessed and Jade thought about it, she couldn't believe she didn't remember any of that.

"I never thought it had been that bad, I don't remember any of it" Jade admitted "All the memories I have of Lorraine are from the times my dad took me to see her"

"That's good, I suppose" Ana said "I'm just glad your father took you away from her"

"He is no better than her, though, he kicked me out of his life as soon as it was legal" She responded "But whatever, it is what it is, I have shitty parents and there's nothing I can do to change them"

Next day Jade was in class, but she was barely paying attention because she was falling asleep as usual, no amount of coffee could keep her up at that point. The gang had noticed she had eye bags and that she was sleepy all the time but they were afraid to ask her why, she'd been reacting very aggressively every time they made comments about it.

"Jade!" Sikowitz exclaimed louder because she was just sitting on her chair fighting the need to close her eyes.

"Yeah?" She asked.

"Am I interrupting your nap?" He asked and she rolled her eyes.

"What do you want?" Jade asked annoyed.

"You've been falling asleep a lot lately" Sikowitz commented.

"Your class has been boring lately" She responded.

"Watch your mouth, young lady" Sikowitz said and she rolled her eyes again. "Anyway, so…"

As soon as the class was over Jade left the classroom but Beck followed her and reached her in the hallway. "Jade wait, we need to talk, you can't avoid me forever" He affirmed as he blocked the way.

"What's the matter?" Jade asked impatiently, she only wanted to take a nap before her next class.

"What's going on with you? I'm worried" Beck said sincerely. "You've refused to have a real conversation with me or our friends for months, you keep avoiding us whenever you can and you are tired all the time, what's happening?" He asked and she was so tired that she could feel the words coming to her mouth, so she preferred not to say anything. "Tell me! I need to understand"

"And I need you to give me space" Jade responded. "I am fine"

"You are not! You look sick" Beck exclaimed. "I just want to help you, what's going on? Is it your father again?"

"What does my father have to do with this?" She asked annoyed.

"I don't know, a few months ago you told me you were having issues with him and you haven't been the same ever since, so tell me the truth, what did he do?" Beck asked worriedly and Jade looked to the side with teary eyes, she didn't even know if she wanted to cry or if she was too sleepy. "Has he hurt you?" He questioned angrily and Jade chuckled.

"No"

"Then why are you acting like this?" Beck questioned.

"I have to go" Jade simply said and pushed him out of the way, she didn't want to say something she might regret. She knew he was being honest, she knew he cared about her and that he loved her, but she didn't want him to be involved in her new shitty life, it was too depressing and shameful.

More days went by and one night, Jade was as usual working in the club, it was a Friday night and the place was crowded so she'd been walking around more than usual. Ana spent most of the time in her office, but she usually came outside to be with Jade and make sure everything was under control.

"Ana! So good to see you" A tall man in a suit said as he greeted her and she smiled.

"Hello Mr. Mills, it's good to see you too!" She said. "You didn't tell me you'd come"

"That's the thing about surprises" Mr. Mills said and Ana faked a laugh, she disliked that man but he owned the club "How's my club going? Everything okay?"

"Yes, it's going great" She said just in the moment Jade was coming back to her desk.

"I can see that" Mr. Mills said and smiled at Jade "Hi gorgeous"

"Good evening sir, do you want a table?" She simply asked.

"Jade, he is Mr. John Mills, owner of the club" Ana informed and she looked at him surprised.

"Of course…I'm sorry, nice to meet you" Jade said politely and smiled but the man was just looking at her from top to bottom.

"Nice to meet you too" He said smirking and she looked at Ana uncomfortably "Let's go to the office so we can speak comfortably"

"Of course" Ana said and began walking while Jade stayed in her place.

"You too…come on in" Mr. Mills ordered and Ana took a breath, she didn't like the fact he'd taken interest in Jade. The three of them went into the office and he closed the door.

"What do you want to talk about?" Ana asked.

"How old are you?" The man asked Jade.

"Eighteen" She responded and he nodded.

"Why is this doll standing at the door when she should be up on the stage?" Mr. Mills asked Ana and Jade's eyes wide opened in nervousness.

"We needed a hostess and she is a good thing to see when you walk in" Ana explained.

"It'd be better to see her dancing, don't you think?" He asked like it was obvious "This is what I get for leaving you in charge, you lack a vision"

"I'm okay as a hostess" Jade said "Ana did offer me the job as dancer but I didn't take it" she added to defend Ana.

"You'd make twice or even three times as much as a dancer, you know?" The man commented. "Any person can greet the customers, they come here for the dancers and you're way too pretty to be wearing all those clothes and standing behind a boring desk" He said and she didn't know what to respond.

"Umm…" Jade said nervously and looked at Ana for help.

"Please John, she is almost a kid and she needs the job, just let her be a hostess" Ana said and he chuckled.

"This isn't a charity, people work doing what is best for the business" John Mills commented and looked at Jade again. "So darling, go backstage and change into something cuter, I want you up there dancing tonight"

"Please John, don't do this" Ana demanded.

"Either she dances or she is out" He informed and turned to her. "Your choice, be wise" he said and she looked at Ana scared, she really didn't want to do it.

"Please, don't make me do this" Jade begged "I am okay like this"

"You are not getting it, doll" He said annoyed "Your job is gone, you're fired and the only position I can offer you is as a dancer so do you take it or not?" He asked and Ana closed her eyes in frustration, she knew she couldn't help Jade anymore.

Jade didn't want to be a stripper, it was bad enough to work in that place and she didn't feel comfortable doing what the other girls did but she needed the job and she was aware Ana had no power to help her, so she had to make the choice.

"I'm waiting, yes or no?" John asked impatiently and Jade sighed.

"Fine" She said coldly in resignation and he smiled.

"Very good choice, you're smarter than you look but I still need to approve your skills" He said and Jade stared at him annoyed "Choose a nice outfit, get on stage and dance for me"

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**I hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**PLEASE REVIEW! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Jade chose an outfit, which was basically lingerie with a short dress on top and she took her turn after the other girl was done. She just tried to block her mind and her feelings, she was scared and she'd grown comfortable being a hostess but she had no choice, she needed the job.

"Good luck" Ana said sadly and Jade sighed as she nodded and stepped on the spotlight.

John was sitting on the sofa in the first row and he was smiling satisfied while Jade stared at him coldly, but she had to put her feelings aside and do the job. She was a good dancer so she simply imagined she was playing a role and put up a show for the audience, she danced provocatively, played with the pole and slowly took pieces of her outfit off until she was only wearing panties and a bra. That's what all the girls did and she simply followed their example.

By the time she was done all the men were cheering excitedly and even throwing money at her, but she simply smiled at John, sent him a kiss and walked off the stage. She'd done it, she'd actually done it and she couldn't believe it.

"Oh my god, you are so good!" One of the other girls said. "You killed it out there"

"Thanks" Jade simply said and walked towards Ana.

"You okay?" She questioned and Jade sighed.

"I thought it'd be worse to be honest" She admitted and Ana smiled sadly.

"It'll be just fine, don't worry" Ana affirmed.

"I hope he liked it" Jade said and Ana rolled her eyes.

"That asshole won't bother you again, he got what he wanted…a new star!" Ana commented and Jade chuckled sadly.

"This wasn't the stardom I wanted…" Jade said and Ana looked at her mortified.

"This is temporary" She responded.

"Well, well…congratulations, I knew you'd do better up there" John said as he smiled at Jade. "Everyone loved you, this place needed an upgrade and now you're here"

"Thanks" Jade said coldly and he smiled cynically.

"Welcome to your new life, doll"

Jade indeed became the very popular in the club but even though she earned more money, she also had to work until later hours and she had to deal with more harassment from the customers. Her performance in school had plummeted because, even though she tried to attend her classes, she could barely focus.

"I want to know what's going on with Jade" Tori commented worriedly as they saw her standing by the food truck, but it was obvious she was exhausted, she was leaning on it and closing her eyes.

"She looks so tired all the time" Cat added.

"I have tried to talk to her but she won't listen, I don't understand" Beck said and took a breath. "Something is clearly not okay, her grades have dropped, she is failing at least three classes and she won't talk to me about it"

"When did this start?" Andre asked.

"At the beginning of the semester, it's been almost five months" Tori responded and they saw her coming back so they stayed quiet.

"You didn't get anything to eat?" Beck asked.

"No, I have to go, I'm feeling a little sick" Jade said.

"I'll take you home" He offered.

"No, I'm fine…stay" She said.

"It's no trouble, I'll take care of you" Beck said nicely.

"I said no" She responded aggressively and he looked at her confused, so she rolled her eyes at herself.

"Sorry, I'm just…tired but it's fine, I'll see you tomorrow" Jade said and simply walked away.

"That went well" Beck said sarcastically and dropped his fork on the plate annoyed. "I don't know what else to do, she is always in such a hurry after school"

"I know, we haven't hung out in a while" Tori added "Do you know what she could be doing after school? Why is she so busy?"

"I have no idea, I don't even feel like we are dating anymore" Beck admitted "I don't know what's happening with her"

"What if we follow her?" Cat suggested and they looked at her confused. "That way we'll know what she does after school"

"Don't you think that's a little extreme?" Andre asked but Beck was actually thinking about it.

"Maybe Cat is right" Beck said. "She gives us no choice, I need to know what's going on and she won't tell me"

"So we'll do it?" Tori asked surprised and Beck sighed.

"Yes"

The gang ran after Jade and managed to find her still standing by her locker so they went outside and took a cab, she no longer had a car so she took one as well and they followed her. The cab had taken a different route from what they expected, she was clearly not going to her father's house and the ride was taking too long.

"Where is she going?" Tori asked confused because they were entering a dangerous zone in the city.

"I don't know" Beck said as he looked around disconcerted as well.

The car stopped next to a tall ugly looking building and Jade went inside so the gang looked at each other confused. "So, here?" The driver asked impatiently.

"What is this place?" Andre asked confused.

"Do you guys think we should go out? I don't feel safe" Tori commented sincerely.

"Come on, we are already here" Beck said and they sighed unsure "Let's go to that café, we'll wait for her to come out"

"Thanks" Robbie said to the cabbie and paid him as they got out of the car. They indeed took Beck's plan and stayed in the café but kept their eyes fixed on the doors of the building, they wanted to see Jade when she came out.

"I don't understand why she came to a place like this" Tori said. "What could she possibly need from it?"

"Drugs? This place must be full of dealers" Robbie said.

"Why would Jade need drugs?" Andre asked.

"I don't know but what else could she be doing here?" Robbie asked.

"That's ridiculous, she doesn't do drugs" Beck commented. "Let's just wait" He said and a waiter walked to them.

"Do you want to order?" He asked.

"A milkshake please, chocolate" Tori said.

"Me too" Cat added.

"I'm fine" Andre said.

"So, two milkshakes, that's it?" The young man asked.

"Hey, maybe you can help us" Beck said. "Have you seen this girl?" He questioned as he showed him a photo of Jade and the man smiled.

"Sure have, not as much as I'd like to though" He said and Beck stared at him coldly.

"What is she doing here?" Tori asked. "No offense…I mean, she is not from around the area" she commented and he chuckled.

"Can't tell you that but you should probably stop by the club down the street in a few hours, maybe you'll find someone who can respond to your questions" The man said and walked away so they looked at each other confused.

Some hours passed and when it was night time, they finally saw Jade walking out of the building, so they immediately stood up and tried to follow her but when they went outside, she was already gone.

"What the hell? Where did she go?" Andre asked.

"Let's go home, I'm tired" Cat said and yawned.

"Should we go to the club?" Robbie asked. "Maybe that guy was right"

"Or maybe he'll set us up for a robbery" Tori said. "Who could give us answers there? It's a strip club"

"Maybe someone knows her, maybe her dealer" Robbie commented.

"Jade is not an addict, Robbie, stop that" Beck ordered annoyed "But I do wanna know if they know her for some reason" He commented and they made their way towards the club. It was huge place with black and red walls, there was a stage in the middle with a pole and a chair on it, as well as lots of tables, sofas and waitresses. It was late so the club was crowded and the music was loud.

They went inside and tried to stop a waitress or someone from the staff but everyone was busy, so they just stood there awkwardly, there was a blonde girl dancing on stage and all the men were cheering for her, so the gang looked at her as well.

"I don't like this place" Cat said nervously and they saw another girl doing a lap dance in one of the sofas; there were small open cabins all around the club where girls did private dances for the customers who could afford it but the others could get a glimpse and the gang was doing it. They could see the brunette girl dancing and slowly stripping for the man in the cabin, she sat on his lap and rubbed her body against his as she grabbed his hands and allowed him to touch her, then she stood up and continued moving provocatively to the beat of the music.

"I don't think she is here" Robbie said as they stared at the girl.

"I wanna go" Cat insisted.

"Just hold on" Beck said and sighed as he looked around the place, he had no idea why the waiter had sent them there and even though he didn't believe he would find Jade, he also had a feeling that he was in the right place to find answers.

The girl on the stage danced for a couple of minutes and then walked away, the lights turned down for a few seconds and when they came back on the gang saw another girl on the stage. She was wearing high heels, a short school skirt, a black bra, an open white shirt on top, two pony tails and a lot of makeup. She made her way to the pole and smiled at the audience. It was Jade.

"Oh my god" Tori said completely shocked.

"This…can't be Jade" Andre added and they looked at each other before turning back to her, she had not seen them so she was doing what she always did.

Jade found it easy after all that time, she smiled and flirted as she danced, she always winked and even sent kisses to the customers because that usually got her more tips. She danced on the pole for a while and then moved to the chair, she played in it seductively and then she started taking items of her outfit off; first her shirt, then the tie and finally the skirt so she ended up in her underwear.

Beck was completely shocked, he couldn't even believe what he was witnessing so he was just watching her and trying process it. His girlfriend of three years was a stripper and he was seeing her dance for other men. It was too much for him to take and he didn't know how to react.

"This can't be happening…" Beck whispered as he looked at her smiling at the customers.

Jade was just dancing when she casually glanced around the place and saw her friends, so her heart stopped and she froze for a few seconds just staring at them, wishing to drop dead in that very moment. They _knew_. It was exactly what she'd been trying to avoid and it had happened.

"Come here, baby" A man shouted as he waved cash at her, but she didn't know what to do so she only smiled awkwardly at the audience and walked off the stage. She didn't know how to manage it, but she walked towards them because it was the only thing she could do, she needed to know why they were there and how they'd react, especially Beck.

"What are you doing here?" Jade asked them confused with a trembling anxious voice.

"I think we should be asking that but we've seen it, you're quite good" Beck said coldly and she looked at him ashamedly.

"You're a stripper but…why?" Tori asked disconcertedly. "You have it all, why are you doing it?"

"You don't understand" Jade said.

"I think we do, we've seen enough" Beck responded and he looked at her coldly "When did you start working here? How many times have you kissed me after you stripped and did a lap dance for an old drunk man?" He asked angrily and she shook her head nervously.

"Beck, please listen to me" She said and tried to touch him, but he moved back.

"Don't" Beck said coldly. "I don't want you to touch me again, you disgust me" He informed.

"Beck…" Jade said sadly.

"Is dancing all you do here? Or do you provide a more…intimate service as well?" He asked emotionlessly.

"No" She affirmed as she shook her head rapidly, she was so scared in that moment.

"So, you're the only exception then?" Beck asked as he grabbed her face and made her look to the side, so she saw two of her coworkers making out with customers inside their cabins and one of them was clearly having sex as well, they could see the man's pants open and the girl moving her hips back and forth while he touched her all over. That wasn't part of the job, but the truth was some girls did it in secret for extra money and the lap dances were an efficient way to do it discreetly because they didn't want to share their earnings with the club.

"I…" Jade started but she didn't even know what to say, she couldn't explain it.

"Go ahead, lie again" Beck responded and her eyes started filling with tears, she felt overwhelmed and she didn't know what to say or do. He was right to be angry, he had just seen his girlfriend stripping on a stage and all the other girls were doing lap dances, making out with the customers or having sex with them. Jade knew he had reasons to doubt anything she said, which just made things worse.

"I know this looks bad, but please listen to me" Jade said.

"You are a good dancer" Cat complimented but Jade didn't say anything, she was just staring at Beck nervously.

"I asked one simple question, do you do anything besides dancing?" Beck asked coldly and she shook her head.

"No, of course not" Jade said anxiously.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" He asked upset and nodded to himself "It's been a long time, you always say you're not in the mood but I guess it makes sense now, these men must leave you fully satisfied, so no need to sleep with your stupid boyfriend" Beck said annoyed and she shook her head.

"No, that's not it, I don't do that" She responded

"They are doing it and you're just like them!" He exclaimed angrily as he looked at her from top to bottom.

"Beck, you have to believe me, I'm not lying" She affirmed but he shook his head as he laughed.

"Of course you are lying, that's all you ever do" Beck commented.

"No" She insisted.

"Oh my god, and to think I've been worried sick about you all this time while YOU STRIPPED FOR OTHER MEN" Beck screamed angrily as he stepped towards her, so she moved back scared, she'd never seen him so furious "And you probably had sex with them too, I've been such a big fucking idiot!" He exclaimed and covered his face.

"No, I only dance I swear" Jade responded.

"I don't believe you" He said and looked at her disgusted.

"Please, you have to listen to me" She insisted and he sighed as he stared at her emotionlessly, in those moments all she could think about was the fact she should've told him what was happening before but she hadn't, he had found out in the worst way and she couldn't do anything to change his mind.

"Everything makes so much sense now" Beck said coldly.

"I'm sorry, I can explain" Jade responded but he simply took a breath and stepped closer to her.

"You know, it's been a rough day and I saw that other girl doing a fantastic job in one of the cabins, I'd like to have you do it for me" He commented and she stared at him with a couple of tears streaming down her face, she didn't know what to say

"Beck…" Jade said sadly, she didn't even have an appropriate response.

"And while you are at it, I'll let you explain why and when you became a whore" He said as he grabbed her arm to make her walk to the cabins.

"I don't think that's necessary, Beck" Andre said annoyed.

"Don't do this, please…" Jade said, his words and his attitude were really hurting her.

"Why not? I'm here and I'm a customer, I want the full service so…tell me, what's your price? How much are you worth?" Beck questioned and she felt like she'd been stabbed, she didn't even know what to respond.

"I think you need to shut up" Tori said coldly and Jade moved her arm back, but she and Beck were still staring at each other.

"Hey baby, here you are" A drunk man said as he approached Jade so she looked at him annoyed. "I want a private" He said and Beck smiled upset as he stared at her.

"I'm busy, can't you see?" Jade said.

"That's okay, darling, I'll wait until you finish him up" The man said and kissed her shoulder, so she looked to the side annoyed and ashamed.

"Don't worry, I changed my mind…she is all yours" Beck said to the man and looked back at Jade "We are done" He informed and she stared at him completely heartbroken.

"Beck wait!" Jade exclaimed and tried to hold his arm, but he pushed her hands away and walked out of the club, so she simply watched him leave as a couple of tears streamed down her face. She'd lost him.

"Forgive him, he is in shock…I'm sure he didn't mean any of that" Tori commented and smiled sadly. "You do…you" she added and the rest of them left while Jade stood there next to the man.

"Come on, sunshine, I already paid for it" The man said and Jade looked down, she couldn't say no because it was her job and John was in the club that night but all she wanted was to go home and cry. She'd lost the only person she loved and she felt hopeless but that didn't matter, she was at work and she couldn't leave, so she took a breath to give herself the strength she needed and looked at the impatient man. It had never been harder to smile and nod.

"Let's go"

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**I know you might be upset with Beck but he's got a point, so...**

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	4. Chapter 4

Next day Jade showed up at school and saw her friends standing by the soda machine, so she approached them, she needed to talk to Beck again. "Hi Jade" Tori said nicely as she saw her walking towards them.

"Hey" Jade responded and looked at Beck, who was staring at her coldly "We need to talk"

"No, we don't" He responded.

"Please" She insisted.

"Did you get good tips last night?" He questioned and she rolled her eyes. "I bet you did a great job with that man, maybe I'll go back for a taste after all"

"Will you just keep insulting me or will you let me explain?" Jade asked back annoyed. "And just so you know, I'm not a prostitute"

"I find that hard to believe" He said.

"It's the truth" She responded.

"You don't even know what the word truth means" Beck said upset "You are a liar, so I don't believe anything you say, I trust my eyes and what I saw speaks volumes, you're just like all those other girls, you're a whore"

"Beck!" Andre exclaimed angrily and Jade took a breath to remain calm, she was trying to be understanding with him.

"I'm not lying" Jade affirmed.

"Jade it's okay, it's your life" Tori said nicely. "Ignore him"

"Exactly, don't mind my comments, we are not even dating anymore so what you do with your body is none of my business" He commented coldly.

"I don't sleep with them, I swear" Jade affirmed.

"It doesn't matter!" He exclaimed annoyed "Even if I believed you, which I don't, it doesn't change what you are" He said disgusted as he looked at her from top to bottom and she looked at him mortified "You strip and dance for all those men and you let them touch you for money, you can't lie about that because I saw you!" Beck said upset.

"Let me explain, please" Jade demanded.

"What for? It's not gonna change anything" Beck said and she looked down because she knew he was right.

"I know" She responded sincerely and sighed "I just need you to understand" she added.

"Understand what? That you decided to be a stripper and cheat on me?" Beck questioned upset.

"I have never cheated on you and I never wanted to be a stripper, it wasn't my choice" Jade affirmed.

"You seemed quite happy with it last night, I'd never seen you smiling and flirting that much" Beck commented.

"I had to, I fake it every day" She explained upset. "It's part of the job but I hate that place more than you could ever know"

"Then why are you there?" Andre asked confused and she sighed.

"I need the job" She said and turned to them. "I used to be the hostess but the owner of the club fired me, he said either I took the job as a stripper or I was out, I had to say yes" she explained.

"But why do you need a job? And why did it have to be there?" Tori asked disconcertedly.

"Part time won't do and I couldn't find anything else, believe me I tried" Jade responded.

"Yes but WHY do you need it? Your dad is rich" Robbie commented and she laughed sarcastically.

"Why don't you come with me?" Jade asked. "I'll take you to my house" she said, she'd been trying to avoid the shame but she figured they'd understand her job if they saw her reality for themselves.

"I don't think that's necessary" Beck said

"Oh, it is…believe me" She responded.

"I don't care, we are done" He affirmed and she sighed sadly.

"I know, just come…please" She said, she knew nothing would change but she wanted him to understand she hadn't done it to hurt him.

"Fine" He said.

"And let me drive your car, I don't have mine anymore" Jade said and he handed her the keys. Jade drove all her friends to the building and they looked around confused.

"You said you'd take us to your house" Tori said.

"I did" Jade responded and opened the door so they followed her all the way to the fourth floor. Just as they arrived, a tattooed bald man walked out of Jade's apartment, so she rolled her eyes and the gang looked at each other confused.

"Who was that?" Tori asked.

"I don't know" Jade simply said and she meant it, her mother usually had many different men over.

"Why are we here?" Cat asked scared and Jade opened the door.

"Welcome to my home…if you can call this a home" She said coldly and they walked inside disconcertedly. The apartment was very small and the first thing they saw was Lorraine in the living room snorting cocaine off the center table so their eyes wide opened.

Jade was used to it at that point so she wasn't scared or surprised, but she could see her friends were, so she looked to the side ashamedly. "That's my mom" She informed and Lorraine turned to them, it was very early in the day but she was already high.

"Your mom? Wasn't she dead?" Beck asked her but she only stared at him ashamedly, Jade wished that were the truth, but it was only the lie she'd made up to avoid talking about her mother's addictions.

"Hey hon, you're back early" Lorraine said and walked towards them, but she kept stumbling because she was drunk.

"Are you serious?" Tori whispered confused.

"I wish I weren't" Jade said.

"Aren't you gonna introduce me to this fine young man?" Lorraine asked as she touched Beck's bicep and smiled at him, Jade rolled her eyes and he looked at her confused.

"Stop it" Jade said and moved her hand away from him, so Lorraine simply continued smoking and laughed.

"What is it darling? You jealous?" She asked cynically and Beck looked at Jade disconcertedly.

"I think you need to rest" Jade said coldly.

"Hold on, isn't he the one on the portrait next to your bed?" Lorraine asked and chuckled "I see, you're afraid I'm gonna screw him and he'll realize he's been wasting his time with you, right?" She commented and laughed, so Jade covered her face with her hand ashamedly while the gang looked at each other not knowing what to say, they were confused.

"Just go back to the couch and leave us alone" Jade ordered and tried to turn her around, but Lorraine resisted it.

"Who are the others?" She asked.

"Friends from school" Jade simply said.

"You have friends?" Lorraine questioned surprised and Jade stared at her annoyed "Now that's something I wasn't expecting, I thought no one liked you" she admitted.

"Shut up and leave us alone" Jade responded but Lorraine ignored her and looked at the gang.

"I'm her mother, I know it might seem weird because she is such an entitled bitch but, in my defense, her father raised her, so I had nothing to do with this" Lorraine said to them as she pointed at Jade and her friends looked at her, while she looked to the side clearly annoyed.

"Umm…nice to meet you" Tori said trying to be nice.

"You don't need to talk to her" Jade responded.

"You can join me if you want" Lorraine said to them and smiled at Beck "Especially you, handsome" She added and he smiled back awkwardly.

"Please leave us alone" Jade insisted and Lorraine chuckled.

"Fine, I'll let you talk to your 'friends', darling" She said and smoked on Jade's face so she moved her head to the side annoyed "Hey, by the way the landlord came looking for you this morning"

"What for?" Jade asked.

"He wanted to see you but I told him you were at school, so he might come later, be nice" Lorraine commented smirking and Jade rolled her eyes.

"Come with me" Jade said and they followed her to the kitchen "Go ahead, take a seat in my grand dining room" she said sarcastically as she sat down and sighed.

"What's happening? This isn't your life" Beck said.

"It is since my dad kicked me out because I finally turned eighteen, not the best birthday I must admit…" She commented "I wasn't expecting to come home to my suitcases awaiting me at the front door" Jade admitted and chuckled, so they looked at each other not knowing what to say.

"He did that?" Tori asked and Jade nodded.

"Yeah, he was very…'factual' about it, I was eighteen and therefore no longer his problem, so he sent me here" She responded.

"You never told me your mom was…" Beck started but cut himself off.

"Alive? A junkie? An embarrassment? Well, she is not something I can brag about, is she? It's better to say she is dead" She commented and sighed. "My dad took me away from her when I was little and I barely saw her all these years, I tried my best to pretend she didn't exist but now she's all I have, which really sucks if you consider the fact she hates me" she commented trying to hide the sadness in her voice but they could feel it.

"She doesn't hate you" Tori said trying to make her feel better but Jade simply turned to her annoyed.

"Don't patronize me, you literally just met her and she didn't waste a chance to show her feelings towards me" Jade responded and Tori looked down.

"Does your dad know she is like this?" Andre asked.

"Of course he does, he gave me some money to get me 'settled' here for six months and ease his conscience but Lorraine stole it all, we were about to get kicked out of the apartment so I sold my car but the money didn't last long" Jade commented.

"And did you tell him what she did?" Robbie asked and she chuckled with irony.

"He didn't even take my calls" She responded and they looked at each other mortified "So I tried looking for a job for weeks but I didn't find anything and then Lorraine said I could either work at the club with a friend of hers or I could sleep with the landlord to avoid paying rent, I think I took my best pick" She explained emotionlessly, resignation was all she had left.

"Oh my god" Tori said shocked.

"And couldn't you say no?" Beck asked "Why can't she work instead? She is the adult here, not you"

"That's what I asked her and she said she could…but then, what was the purpose of me? She said that either I worked to pay the bills, or I could go live on the street because she wasn't going to keep my 'ungrateful ass' here for free" Jade commented and saw their shocked faces.

"That woman is your mother?" Andre asked surprised and she nodded.

"I find it hard to believe too" Jade admitted emotionlessly.

"But if she is like this, then-"Tori started but Jade cut her off.

"Then why don't I find a place for myself?" She asked and they nodded "I have tried but there is nothing in my price range, this shithole is as good as it gets for a stripper, so I'm stuck here" She commented and they looked at each other not knowing what to say.

"Jade, I'm so sorry" Tori said sincerely. "I had no idea…"

"Yeah well, that was rather the point" Jade responded and took a breath as she stared at their faces. "I didn't bring you here to have you look at me the way you're doing it now, this is not a pity party" she added annoyed and they looked at each other.

"We are just processing" Beck admitted.

"You pity me and I get it, my life sucks but don't do that" Jade commented coldly. "I just thought, if you already know what I do for a living you might as well understand why" she added sincerely.

"Yeah, it all makes sense now…" Andre said and Jade looked at Beck.

"I'm so sorry for not telling you before, I was ashamed, I knew what you would think of me and I didn't want to lose you" Jade admitted sadly as a couple of tears streamed down her cheeks, but she wiped them away and he looked down.

"I'm sorry for how I reacted" Beck said sincerely.

"It's fine" She responded.

"No, it's not fine" He said "I was a jerk and I'm sorry"

"I know you are, but that doesn't change the fact you think I'm a whore so…" Jade responded and he shook his head "It's partly true I guess, I strip for men who give me money and my mom tries to pimp me out any chance she gets, you literally just heard her"

"It's not your fault, I'm sorry for calling you a…whore" He said embarrassedly and shook his head at himself.

"Stop it, Beck" Jade said almost angrily as she stood up. "I will dance in the club tonight again and it won't be different from yesterday, the fact you know why I do it doesn't change what you think of it or me"

"Yes it does, I know you had no choice now" Beck responded.

"You can't be stupid enough to think I did it out of pleasure" Jade said. "Did you really not think I had reasons?" she asked and he thought about it.

"I…I don't know, I was upset, I didn't really think about why you were there" He commented and she nodded. "But things are different now, I understand"

"I'm glad you do, but as you said this morning…it doesn't change anything" She said and he looked down regretting his choice of words, he knew she wouldn't forget them.

"I'm sorry" He said.

"Listen, I just wanted you to understand why I'm there and I think you do now, so it's time for you to go back to your normal lives and get out of mine" Jade commented.

"What?" Tori asked confused.

"What did you expect?" Jade asked back.

"You need help" Andre responded.

"I need you to leave" Jade commented.

"What are you talking about?" Tori asked. "We are your friends, we won't leave you"

"She is right" Beck added. "You are not alone"

"I don't want your compassion" Jade said coldly.

"It's not compassion, I care because I love you" He affirmed but she didn't really believe they had a future after that.

"You love me? So, you no longer think I have a price?" Jade asked coldly and he looked down ashamedly.

"I should have never said that" Beck admitted.

"It's what you think, Beck, let's just face it" Jade commented

"No, it's not, I didn't think when I said it" He responded and she nodded "I love you and I'm here for you now" He added and she nodded incredulously.

"Will you let me touch you knowing I did a lap dance for a drunk man the night before?" She questioned quoting him again and he sighed mortified "Yeah, I thought so"

"I'm sorry for the way I treated you and for what I said, I mean it" Beck said again.

"It's fine, I understand" Jade said sincerely "You had just learned your girlfriend was a stripper, I get it" She added and he nodded.

"Yes, but it doesn't excuse my behavior" He commented "I shouldn't have insulted you…or tried to make you dance for me, that was out of place, I don't even know what I was thinking" Beck admitted as he looked down ashamedly.

"You were thinking about the fact I do it for other men, so why wouldn't I do it for you, right?" Jade said sadly and shrugged in resignation "Understandable" She added with a little fake smile to hide her sadness.

"So, you're not mad?" Beck asked confused.

"Me? No, you had every reason to be angry with me" Jade admitted "I shouldn't have lied to you"

"No, you shouldn't have but I understand why you did it" Beck responded.

"Yeah…but it doesn't change the fact you wouldn't date a stripper" Jade commented sincerely and looked down to hide her teary eyes "Now please go, this is embarrassing enough" She added as she wiped her tears away.

"No, I won't just step back now and leave you alone with this" Beck affirmed.

"There is nothing you can do, this is my life and it won't change" Jade said.

"We'll find a way, I'm not leaving you alone" He responded "You ARE my girlfriend, Jade" He said and she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Am I?" Jade asked confused "As far as I remember, you broke up with me last night and this morning…again"

"I'm sorry, okay? Like I said, I shouldn't have said any of that, now please stop being so stubborn and let us help you" He commented.

"Listen, I could pretend we were a normal couple before but now you know the truth, so we can't just act like nothing's wrong" She said.

"Of course something's wrong" Beck responded "You shouldn't have to do this but it's not your fault and I won't leave you alone with it"

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	5. Chapter 5

"You shouldn't have to do this but it's not your fault and I won't leave you alone with it" Beck affirmed but then someone rang the bell. She simply left the kitchen and opened the door only to see her landlord standing outside, so she rolled her eyes.

"What do you want?" Jade asked.

"What are those manners?" He asked as he walked inside without even asking.

"Do you need something?" She asked annoyed, the gang was in the kitchen but the apartment was small so they could see what was happening.

"How about a smile?" He said and tried to touch her face, but she moved back.

"I'm busy" Jade said coldly.

"Don't be rude, ya mama said you'd be happy to see me" The man said.

"She was wrong" She responded.

"Come on honey, don't be so hard" He said and grabbed her arm, she tried to move it back but he was holding it tightly "Let's go to my apartment, I promise you won't regret it" He affirmed as he tried to pull her towards the door.

"Get your hands off me" Jade said upset as she struggled to free her arm and Beck immediately walked out of the kitchen.

"What's going on here?" Beck asked coldly and the landlord stared at him annoyed as he let go of Jade's arm.

"Who is this?" The man questioned.

"None of your business, get out" Jade ordered.

"So, you also work at home now, uh?" The man said smirking and looked at her "Then why do you keep resisting, doll?" He asked and put his arm around her waist to bring her close to him.

"What the hell are you doing?" She asked as she pushed him back and Beck put his arm in front of her to keep the man away.

"Who the hell are you?" Beck asked angrily.

"Who am I? I'm the man that can make this stripper and her mother homeless if I feel like it" The man commented.

"What do you want? Rent is not due yet" Jade said coldly.

"It wasn't but it is now, that's what you get for being a bitch" The man responded "So tell me sunshine, do you have the money?" He asked and she looked at him worriedly.

"Not right now, give me until tomorrow" Jade demanded.

"No" He said.

"It wasn't due today and I don't have it right now, what am I supposed to do?" She asked annoyed.

"I'm sure we could arrange something" He said as he stroked her lip and looked down at her chest so she rolled her eyes and pushed his hand away, she couldn't believe he was completely ignoring the fact Beck was there.

"Back off" Beck ordered and the man smiled at Jade.

"Tell your client to stop talking to me" He said and Jade looked down not even knowing what to respond, she was so ashamed of her life and what everyone thought of her "Wrap it up with him quickly and come to my apartment in a nice little dress if you don't want to sleep on the street tonight"

"I'm not her client, you fucking idiot" Beck said angrily, he couldn't believe what he was hearing; that man had no respect for Jade.

"Then why are you here?" The man questioned confused.

"I'm her b…friend" Beck said and the man laughed.

"I don't care" He said. "So…hon, you coming or not?"

"For the millionth time, I won't sleep with you now or ever" Jade affirmed. "You'll have the rent tonight, now get out"

"Fine princess, tonight plus twenty percent for being so stubborn" The man said.

"You can't do that" Jade said upset.

"Yes I can, you're renting this place for a price below market range and we don't have an official contract, so I can do what I want and it's all legal" The man affirmed cynically and she stared at him angrily.

"Go to hell" Beck said but the man simply laughed and looked at Jade.

"You know the deal now, sweetheart, I expect my money or you with a better attitude…tonight" He said and sent her a kiss while she glared at him coldly, the man simply left the house and she locked the door.

"Asshole" Jade whispered angrily.

"What was that?" Andre asked confused.

"That was my fucking landlord" Jade said coldly and walked back into the kitchen upset.

"Does this happen often?" Beck asked her shocked and she sighed.

"Yeah, kind of, but he was worse today" She informed annoyed "And the worst part is that he is right, he can keep asking for more money" Jade said angrily and hit the table upset "Damn it"

"What are you gonna do?" Cat asked worriedly.

"Not sleep with him, that's for sure" She responded and sighed "I'll figure it out"

"No, we need to get you out of here" Beck affirmed.

"There is no 'we' in this, it's me and I can't leave because I can't afford anything else" Jade said.

"No way, I'm not going to leave you here after what just happened" He responded and then Lorraine walked out of the living room.

"Don't worry about her, handsome, she is fine" Lorraine said as she squeezed Jade's cheeks, but she pushed her hand away.

"What the hell did you tell that man?" Jade asked angrily.

"He really likes you, baby, I'm just looking out for you" Lorraine commented as she served a glass of whisky "If you were smart, you'd be nice to him and we wouldn't have to worry about money again"

"He doesn't want me to just be 'nice', mom and you know it" Jade responded angrily and Lorraine rolled her eyes.

"Okay, he wants more…so what? You are a big girl, honey, you can handle it" She commented and took a sip of her whisky "He told me he is willing to let us live here for free! You just need to smile and let him have fun with you when he comes around, that's it!" Lorraine added like it didn't matter and Jade stared at her trying to hold the tears back and taking little breaths to stay calm, she was so tired.

"Let him have fun with me…" Jade repeated emotionlessly and her mother nodded.

"Yeah, it's quite simple" She said and started playing with Jade's hair "Just be flirty, dress a little sexier and sleep with him when he tells you to, it would only take a couple of nights a week…and maybe a few blowjobs when he is in the mood, it's a pretty sweet deal, baby" She commented.

Beck and Tori looked at each other appalled by her words and then looked at Jade, who could barely keep it together, it was obvious she was hurt and angry "Oh my god" Jade said as she shook her head confused and walked to the side, she always had a hard time processing the new lows Lorraine could go to.

"Are you gonna start crying again?" Lorraine asked annoyed and Jade turned back to her "It's no big deal, Jesus…" she added and rolled her eyes.

"You told him I would do it, didn't you?" Jade asked coldly.

"I just said you were playing hard to get, but let's be real, honey, this is your best bet" Lorraine affirmed.

"You're…unbelievable" Jade said shocked.

"If anything, you should be thankful that I'm keeping him interested" Lorraine commented and smiled "Honey, you're like a prize he wants now, do you know how much power that gives you? As long as he thinks he has a chance, he'll keep bringing the bar higher until he hits your price"

"He doesn't have a chance!" Jade exclaimed "His harassment was bad enough before and now he won't stop, how could you do this to me?" She asked, anger and disappointment dripping from her voice as her eyes filled with tears.

"You are always so dramatic, it's just sex" Lorraine commented "Just imagine it, if we didn't pay rent we could use the money you earn in something else, you could even save up to buy a new car or you could actually be a good daughter and give me some money too"

"Are you for real right now?" Jade asked coldly.

"That money could really help us both and you know it, but you're a selfish bitch just like your father" Lorraine said annoyed "Always controlling me with money, if you cared about me you'd do this" She added and the gang shook their heads at how manipulative that woman was, but it was clear Jade wasn't falling for it.

"Oh, so you want me to be that man's whore and work at the club to finance your addictions? Are you fucking kidding me?" Jade asked angrily.

"I want you to start using your brain and realize this is the best for you too" Her mother said coldly.

"How is sleeping with that pig the best for me, mother? Enlighten me" Jade responded sarcastically and Lorraine held her daughter's face to look into her eyes.

"Sweetie, what do you think your future looks like? You're a stripper, no man is ever going to take you seriously and your beauty won't last forever, so take what you can now and stop being so stupid" Lorraine said and Jade pushed her hands back aggressively as a few tears streamed down her face, she'd even forgotten her friends were there at that point but then she saw them on the side just looking at her mortified.

"Please just go" Jade said to them trying to keep herself together, but she felt overwhelmed and it showed.

"Yeah, she needs to get ready for work" Lorraine said and they looked at her upset.

"How can you be so cruel to your own daughter?" Tori asked coldly.

"I'm just being honest with her, honey" She responded "It's the truth and you all know it, no man wants to date a stripper and that's what she is" she added and Jade looked at Beck sadly so he shook his head, but she ignored him and simply walked out of the apartment, she couldn't stand to be there any longer.

"You are despicable" Beck said to Lorraine as he and the rest of the gang walked out of the apartment as well. They didn't see Jade outside, but they heard someone running upstairs so they went up to the rooftop.

"Jade?" Tori said loudly because the rooftop was empty, so they walked around the wall and saw Jade standing there wiping her tears away.

"Jade…" Cat said sadly and she simply looked at them, so she saw their mortified faces and she rolled her eyes.

"I told you to leave" She responded.

"Come with us, please" Beck said.

"Yes, your mother is horrible! You can't stay with her" Tori added.

"And what am I supposed to do? I have nowhere else to go" Jade commented.

"We'll find a place, you can't be here with her and with that man…I mean, she tried to pimp you out to him, I thought you were being sarcastic when you said it, but she actually did it" Andre commented appalled and she chuckled sadly.

"Yeah, she actually did it…" She said emotionlessly as a couple more tears streamed down her cheeks and took a breath "But maybe deep inside she believes she is helping me, she wasn't wrong about everything" she commented.

"What?" Beck asked confused.

"I'm a stripper, of course everyone is going to believe the key to my pants is in a wallet" Jade said sadly and looked down.

"That's not true, she said all those things to manipulate you" Beck responded "Please come with us"

"I can't, I have to work" Jade said and they shook their heads.

"Jade please, we'll figure a way out of this, you don't have to keep doing it" Beck affirmed.

"There is no way out of this, it's just how things are" She said coldly "So just go, I need to rest and get ready for work" She added as she walked past them to go downstairs again.

The gang didn't want to leave her there but it was clear she wasn't going to go with them so they left "I can't believe Jade's life is like this now" Tori said as she and the gang walked into her living room.

"I know, it's so…depressing" Andre added and sat down. "What the hell is wrong with her mother?"

"She is horrible" Cat said.

"We should have stayed" Beck commented. "She shouldn't face this all alone, it's not fair"

"She didn't want us to be around and I get it, she is ashamed of her job and her house…and her mother" Tori said.

"I can't get my head around her father's rejection, how can he do that to his own daughter?" Robbie asked "He must know her mother is a monster"

"He's never liked Jade" Cat commented.

"But these are extreme circumstances, that woman coerced her into being a stripper and now she is pimping her out like it's no big deal" Andre added and shook his head.

"Both of her parents are horrible, I don't think he'll care" Beck commented "But we need to do something"

"Could she move in with you?" Tori asked.

"I don't think so, I mean she can stay for a few days but not forever" He responded sadly "Not at my house at least, I would have to move out too but maybe then we could both get part time jobs, right?" He asked.

"Yeah, that could work" Tori said.

"I don't think she wants to move in with you, though" Andre commented "And I understand why she feels insecure about you now"

"I apologized" Beck responded.

"Yeah, but she probably feels you did it out of compassion" He said.

"That's true, she was very annoyed when she thought we pitied her" Tori added and Beck sighed.

"What other choice do we have?" He questioned.

"I don't know, but I don't feel comfortable knowing she is there" Tori admitted "We need to convince her to leave"

Jade borrowed money from Ana that night and paid the rent but she had to deal with the landlord's harassment as usual, she knew he wouldn't stop giving her a hard time after knowing what he and Lorraine had discussed, but she wasn't willing to give in.

"Thank you for the loan, I'll pay you as soon as I get my check" Jade said to Ana as she put her makeup on in the dressing room.

"Don't stress over it" Ana said nicely "How are you doing? I saw you talking to some people last night" she commented and Jade looked down.

"They were my friends, they know it all" She informed. "I had to take them home and they met Lorraine, I needed them to understand"

"How did they take it?" Ana questioned.

"It was okay, they were nice…Beck even apologized for calling me a whore and tried to get back together" Jade said and chuckled sadly. "Pity really hits people hard"

"He doesn't pity you, he is concerned" She commented.

"I know he is concerned, but that doesn't change the fact he dumped me because he wouldn't date a stripper" Jade said. "That's the truth even if he denies it, he just feels bad for me now"

"You are not just a stripper, Jade" Ana affirmed.

"No? Really?" Jade asked and looked at the mirror as she smiled sadly. "What does this look like to you?"

"This is temporary, your life will change" She responded and Jade tried to smile but the truth was she couldn't really see a future or a different life, she was tired of everything and she just wanted things to end. Jade felt she was trapped in deep dark hole she would never crawl out of and Lorraine's words replayed in her head; she was a stripper and that's what she always would be to the people around her.

"Yeah…" Jade said emotionlessly because she didn't want to keep talking about it.

"You okay, love?" Ana asked and she nodded as she stood up.

"The show must go on"

* * *

**I know, Lorraine is horrible. **

**I hope you enjoyed the chapter! :)**

**PLEASE REVIEW! I LOVE SEEING YOUR COMMENTS**


	6. Chapter 6

Jade skipped school the rest of the week because she didn't want to face her friends or life in general, she just wanted to sleep and get lost in her dreams, they were much better than reality. However, Friday night came and she had to show up at the club knowing John would be there so she had to put up with him too.

"Amazing as always" John said as he greeted her downstage and she faked a smile.

"Thanks" Jade said.

"I already got paid for your next five lap dances, make them worth the price hon" He said as he tapped her nose and winked.

Jade remembered the night Beck had seen her and she could hear him asking her what her price was, she knew all those men asked John the same question every night and she could never say no. She simply sighed and walked towards the cabin to do exactly that, make herself worth the price, _she had a price_ and that hard, cold truth made her feel completely empty.

"Well, well…if it isn't the prettiest doll in the neighborhood" The landlord said as soon as Jade walked into the cabin and she looked at him annoyed "What is it, sweetie? Did you think you'd be able to escape forever?" He asked cynically.

"Good evening, sir" Jade said coldly and he chuckled.

"That has a nice ring to it…'Sir', I like it, I might have you call me that when we are alone" The man said but she remained emotionless "How about a smile, sweetie? I'm paying for this" He added.

"Of course" Jade said coldly and faked a little sarcastic smile, so he laughed.

"Good, now dance for me" He ordered smirking and she took a breath to give herself the strength she needed, then she started moving slowly and walking towards him, but she was scared and disgusted to even be near him.

"What you and my mom talked about…You can forget it" Jade said as she sat down on his lap and continued dancing.

"You're being annoyingly dumb, sweetheart" The man commented as he put his hands on her hips.

"I'm not going to sleep with you" Jade affirmed again and he smiled as he stroked her back.

"You say that now, but you'll change your mind" He affirmed "In a few months, you'll be doing this in my room and I'll take off the pretty lingerie you're wearing with my teeth" The man added as he held her close to him and she glared at him coldly.

"Never" Jade responded and stood up to turn around, she sat down again facing the wall and he put his arms around her to make her lean back on him.

"Oh honey, I always get I want" He affirmed on her ear "And I swear, you'll be begging me to keep going" He added and licked her cheek, so she closed her eyes disgusted.

"Get your hands off me" Jade ordered calmly and he simply did it, he put his hands behind his neck and she turned to him again, she felt safer having her eyes on him.

"Go on, keep dancing for me…" He demanded cynically and she glared at him annoyed, but she kept going, she always had to keep going.

Jade finished working that night and felt more exhausted than ever, but it wasn't only the physical exhaustion, she was mentally and emotionally drained, she needed a break from everything and everyone. She stepped into her apartment at 5AM and found her mother sleeping on the sofa. There were some drugs on the center table, so Jade grabbed them and walked out of the room, she initially meant to throw them in the trash but right before she did it, she had a change of heart.

Jade had never tried drugs before but part of her wondered why her mother liked them so much and why she'd always chosen them over her. She figured that if that was going to be her life, she could at least make herself feel less miserable, it seemed to work for Lorraine and some of the girls at the club.

"Is this what you are now?" Jade whispered upset and looked at the bottle of vodka across the table, she simply reached for it and stared at it for a few seconds.

Jade looked around her apartment and felt nothing but hopelessness, all she could think about was all the men who'd touched her that night alone and what her mother had said, her aspirations and dreams seemed to be getting further. She'd tried to make sense of her life, she'd tried to do what was needed to survive and continue studying but that was no longer enough; nothing she tried made her feel better, she couldn't see the end of all that darkness.

Jade drank some vodka from the bottle and closed her eyes because it was strong but then she laughed and looked at her mother in the living room "The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, I guess" She said and put a pill in her mouth, she drank more vodka and simply sat back. She hoped she'd finally find some peace of mind or at least a distraction from her misery.

Jade's experience with the drug had been better than she expected, she'd actually enjoyed it and she made it a habit to take a pill after work every night. After a week, she also started doing cocaine before dancing to make it easier and it had done wonders for her, she didn't feel sad and she had more energy.

"Jade, are you okay?" Ana asked concernedly and Jade smiled.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" She asked confused as she put on her lipstick.

"I don't know, honey, you've been acting strange for days" Ana commented.

"You are imagining things, I'm fine" Jade affirmed but Ana knew something was up. "In fact, I'm a lot better now, I feel fresh"

"Have you talked to your friends?" She questioned.

"They keep trying but I don't need them around" Jade said and smiled at Ana through the reflection.

"Why?" She asked confused.

"My life is none of their business" Jade explained. "And I don't need their pity"

"You should let them in" Ana commented. "They are your friends"

"Yeah, whatever" Jade said and stood up smiling, she seemed full of energy and it was clear thinking about her friends hadn't bothered her at all.

"Jade, I have a question for you" Ana said and Jade looked at her.

"What?"

"Have you tried anything?" She asked and Jade smiled confused.

"Like what?" She asked back.

"You know what" Ana said coldly and she rolled her eyes. "Answer me"

"I don't have to answer that" Jade said and tried to walk away but Ana held her arm.

"Tell me the truth, I know those things are laying around in your house all the time" She demanded. "Have you?"

"No, of course not" Jade lied and moved her arm back. "I can't believe you think that of me now"

"There is something up with you" Ana affirmed. "All this sudden energy and positivity is not normal, I'm sure you are hiding something"

"You know what drugs mean to me, I would never use them" Jade responded pretending to be upset "Maybe I'm different because I have decided not to let this life drag me down"

"Is that really the reason?" Ana asked again and Jade rolled her eyes.

"You know what? I really don't care if you believe me, so think whatever you want" She responded and shrugged "I'm up next" She simply said and left the room.

Later that night she came home and found her mother blowing a man in the living room, so she rolled her eyes and went to the kitchen. She hoped to find some pills there, but Lorraine had taken them so Jade simply poured herself a glass of whisky and watched her mother getting the merchandise in exchange for her service.

"See ya" The man said and smiled while Lorraine wiped her mouth smirking.

"Bye" She said and showed him out "I see you're back early" She said to Jade and joined her in the kitchen.

"Not many customers tonight" Jade responded and drank another glass of whisky as she looked at the pills in her mother's hand, so Lorraine smiled.

"Whatcha looking at?" She asked.

"What did you…afford?" Jade asked and her mother sat down next to her.

"I know you've been stealing from me" Lorraine said and Jade chuckled as she took another sip of whisky.

"I would hardly call it stealing" Jade responded.

"You took it without my permission" She commented.

"You can't steal what's been stolen, can you? You stole from me first, as far as I'm concerned you owe me these and all the others you get until you make up for all the money you took" Jade affirmed.

"Honey no need to get defensive, I'm not mad" Lorraine said. "In fact, I am going to give you something even better…The pills and coke you've taken are just appetizers, this is the real deal" She added and grabbed a needle from the bag. Jade knew she was talking about heroin and stronger things, so she stared at her nervously.

"What's so good about it?" Jade asked.

"Find out yourself" Lorraine said and grabbed her arm.

"I don't know…" She responded and resisted it, but Lorraine smiled calmly.

"Honey, it's fine…trust me" She said, so Jade took a breath and let her do it. Lorraine tied an elastic band around her arm and prepared the dose while Jade shook her foot anxiously, she wasn't sure about upgrading her intake but part of her wanted to try.

"Ah…" Jade said when the needle got into her skin.

"Sh, sh…it's okay" Lorraine said in a soothing manner and injected the drug, so Jade closed her eyes and took a breath "Done, you'll feel it soon enough" she added and then injected herself as well.

Jade indeed felt more relaxed than she'd ever been and it was as if suddenly there were no problems in the world, she felt calm and happy and that's all she wanted. She wanted all the noises and voices in her head to stop bothering her, she wanted to stop feeling, she wanted to stop thinking, she wanted peace and she'd just found the easiest way to get it.

From that night on, Jade took more and more drugs and it quickly became an addiction, she couldn't go on with her day if she didn't take her dose. She'd also started drinking more and trying her best avoid feeling anything, it made things better. She figured if she was always high or numb, facing her life would be easier and it was proving to be true, but her body became accustomed to it, so she had to keep increasing her doses.

Three months had passed since the night she'd taken her very first pill, but she felt it'd been a lifetime. She couldn't imagine living without them, the drugs and the alcohol made her life more bearable. Dancing for drunk old men didn't feel as bad when she was high and the alcohol numbed her out enough to handle all the increasingly overwhelming emotions she had every day.

"I'm worried about Jade" Tori commented during lunch. "She misses at least one day of school every week"

"She must be tired from work" Robbie said.

"But it's not only that, haven't you noticed the way she looks?" Tori asked. "She must've lost twenty pounds in like two months"

"I noticed that too" Beck commented and sighed. "I don't know what else to do, I keep calling her but she won't pick up"

"She doesn't want us around, she said it" Andre said.

"Yeah but that's because she is ashamed" Tori commented and sighed "I asked my mom for help with this and she said she would gladly let Jade stay with us for a while, but it's not a permanent thing either, we are kind of tight on money so we can't adopt another person into our family" she added sadly.

"My mom said that too" Cat said mortified "Do you guys think we should go see her?" She asked.

"Yeah but that's not enough, we need to get her away from that toxic environment, at least for a few days" Beck said. "She needs a break to think clearly"

"And what are we gonna do? Kidnap her?" Andre asked.

"Hey, didn't Sikowitz say something about a camping trip next week?" Robbie questioned and they thought about it.

"Yeah!" Cat exclaimed.

"But he said it might get cancelled because no one signed up" Tori commented.

"But what if we do sign up?" Beck asked.

"That doesn't guarantee she will" Andre responded.

"It will if Sikowitz conditions her" Beck said. "She is about to fail the class, maybe if he says he'll give her extra credit she'll agree"

"That could work" Tori said. "But what would we get from that?"

"Some time with her, away from her life and everything…and she'll be stuck with us, nowhere to run" He responded. "Maybe she'll finally let us in, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I think it's a good plan" Andre said and Beck nodded.

"We don't lose anything by trying"

* * *

**:(**

**I hope you enjoyed the chapter, PLEASE REVIEW! :)**


	7. Chapter 7

Beck decided to pay Jade a visit again, it'd been a long time since they'd been to her house and he wanted to talk to her, but she always avoided him, so he thought it was time to see her there. It was Saturday morning and he knew she'd be home because she'd worked late the night before.

"Hey" Beck said as soon as the door opened but what he saw wasn't exactly what he expected. Jade was still wearing jeans and a shirt from the night before, her hair was messy and her eyes were red.

"What are you doing here?" Jade asked confused as she rubbed her eyes and he looked at her not knowing what to say, he hadn't expected to see her like that.

"I wanted to see you and talk" Beck said and she blinked because she was clearly sleepy.

"Well, I don't" Jade said and tried to close the door, but he stopped her.

"Let me in, please" He said and she rolled her eyes as she walked into the kitchen so he closed the door and followed her. When he stepped in the kitchen, he saw her hiding some things in a basket and she put it in the corner, then she took a seat and he did too.

"What do you want?" Jade asked coldly as she avoided eye contact.

"We need to talk" Beck said and she chuckled as she looked at him.

"Do you want a lap dance? Sorry, I'm off duty but you can come to the club tonight and I'll be pleased to make you happy" She said with irony and he sighed "I'm sorry about the other night, I should've told you the price" she added.

"Please, I'm not joking" He responded.

"Neither am I" Jade said coldly "I have a price, Beck, everyone keeps saying it so I guess it must be true" she commented trying to hide the sadness in her voice, but it was something that clearly hurt her.

"You don't have a price" Beck responded.

"Yes, I do" Jade affirmed "You believe it, my mom believes it, the landlord believes it and every man I've ever come in contact with at the club believes it, everyone thinks they can buy me and they are not wrong" she said.

"Listen, I understand how you're feeling but that's not true, I was wrong and so is everyone else" Beck said to make her feel better, but she only stared at him emotionlessly.

"You can't possibly understand how I feel" She simply responded and he sat down next to her.

"Jade, please stop shutting me out" He said "I came here to talk about us, you've been avoiding me"

"Yeah, well…I feel that should give you a hint, you shouldn't be here" Jade commented.

"We need to talk" Beck insisted.

"There is nothing to talk about" Jade affirmed and stood up. "You dumped me because I'm a stripper and I get it, what else is there to say?" She asked as she walked over to the kitchen cabinet, she simply opened it and grabbed a bottle of whisky.

"I love you and you know it" Beck said and she turned around as she served a full glass of whisky, so he stared at her confused, it was early in the morning.

"No, you don't…You want to fix my life because you feel bad for me, that's different" Jade said and sat down again, she put the bottle next to her and started drinking the whisky like it was water, but she closed her eyes at the end of each long sip.

"Isn't it a little early to be drinking?" He asked as she served another glass and she laughed.

"You want some?" She asked and he shook his head, so she started drinking her second glass.

"Have you even had breakfast yet?" He asked and she served more whisky.

"I'm doing it now, cheers!" She said aggressively and drank up the glass, so he looked at her confused.

"Jade, are you okay?" Beck questioned worriedly "You seem…upset" He said for a lack of a better word, he didn't know how to approach her obvious drinking habit.

"Me? Upset? Why would I be upset?" Jade asked him back and served yet another glass. "Maybe because my father kicked me out of his house on my eighteenth fucking birthday? Or because I have to dance in my underwear until 5AM to survive? Or maybe because I live in this shithole? No, I'm not upset, cheers to that! Cheers to my wonderful fucking life" She said coldly and drank up the whisky in her glass.

"I'm really sorry things are so complicated for you" Beck said sincerely and she chuckled sarcastically as she began to serve her fifth glass of whisky so he stopped her. "But this is not a good way to fix it" he said as he took the glass and the bottle from her.

"How could you know? Your life is perfect" Jade said angrily and tried to grab the bottle back, but he put it away "Give it back"

"That's more than enough alcohol, it's 10am, it's been less than ten minutes and you've almost finished the bottle" Beck commented.

"That's none of your business" Jade said annoyed. "Get out, I don't need this right now" she said referring to his presence and he sighed.

"You are not okay" He said.

"I'm really tired, Beck, I had a very long night and all I want right now is to sleep, I don't need you to start questioning me again" Jade commented.

"I'm not trying to question you, I'm just concerned about you" Beck said sincerely. "You look sick"

"Again, not your problem" She said as she looked at him angrily.

"Why are you so angry with me? I know I was an asshole that night, but I've apologized, I'm sorry for how I reacted" Beck commented. "I just want you to be okay and I want you to let me be close to you again, we can fix this"

"The way you reacted that night is normal, I told you I'm not mad about that" Jade admitted. "I just hate that you're really here trying to pretend you no longer care that I'm a fucking STRIPPER" She said madly. "You act all nice and say you love me but we both know that deep inside you can't stand the fact I dance for other men, you said it…I disgust you and that didn't magically change when I told you why I do it, so I can't believe you think I'm stupid enough to believe your pity lies" She commented upset.

"I'm not lying and I don't pity you, Jade, how many times do you need to hear it to believe me?" He questioned. "I'm genuinely concerned about you, we've dated for years and I love you, do you really think that just disappeared when I saw you at the club? It didn't, I said things because I was angry, but I didn't mean it"

"No? So, you'd be fine dating a stripper?" Jade asked calmly and leaned towards him. "You would kiss me and touch me and sleep with me knowing what I did at work?" She asked seductively as she moved closer to his face, almost kissing him.

"What are you trying to prove?" Beck asked confused and she stared at him for a few seconds, she expected him to push her back, but he wasn't doing it.

"Nothing, just leave" Jade simply said as she moved back but he held her hand.

"What? You expected me to say I no longer want you?" He asked and smiled as he shook his head. "Well, as you can see, you're wrong and so is your mother, this isn't how your life is going to end"

"You are lying to yourself if you think that's true" Jade affirmed. "No one would date a girl like me, not even you so don't lie to me and don't lie to yourself, I'm no longer what you want"

"I'm an adult, Jade, I think I know what I want" Beck responded and she tried to move her hand back but he kept holding it so she just pulled her sleeves down. He noticed it and he didn't really understand why she'd done it, but he didn't want to confront her about it in the middle of their argument.

"You don't, you just pity me and you think that's love" She said

"It's not pity, I love you and I want to fix things" He affirmed but she simply pulled her arm away aggressively.

"You loved the person I used to be, but she's long gone" She commented and folded her arms, so he looked at her sadly. "This is what I am now, a stripper who drinks whisky for breakfast and who doesn't need your compassion so just go" she said impatiently.

"Why are you doing this? Why do you push me away? I want to help you, you're not alone" Beck affirmed.

"Of course I am alone" Jade responded madly "Look around you, Beck, this is my life now and there is nothing you or anyone can do to change that" she said.

"We can figure out a way out of this together" He affirmed and held her face gently. "I know you feel trapped and alone but you're not" He said as he looked into her eyes "Why do you keep pushing us away?"

"I'm doing you a favor" Jade responded "You feel this way now but it won't last, you'll wish to leave, everyone does" she admitted with a couple of tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Is this about your parents? You think we'll leave you because they did?" Beck asked and she looked down "We won't" He affirmed.

"Why would you stay?" Jade asked sincerely.

"Why? Are you seriously asking me that?" He asked "I just told you, it's because I love you and I care about you, we all do"

"Just leave, please" Jade demanded as she moved back and he sighed, he knew she wouldn't give in that day, so he decided to please her and leave.

"Fine, I'll leave you to rest but that doesn't mean I'm out of your life" Beck affirmed. "Please take care of yourself and if you need anything at all, just call me" He added nicely and she looked to the side while he walked away.

He left the apartment and she immediately started crying, she loved him and she believed he wanted to be with her but she didn't want to drag him into her hole of misery, he deserved better and she knew it. She much preferred to push him away than to have him leaving her later on, she was aware of what being a stripper meant and she knew he wouldn't tolerate it for long regardless of what he said.

Beck met with his friends at Tori's house later that day to play cards and plan their camping trip but he couldn't focus, he just kept replaying his conversation with Jade and examining her behavior, it was concerning and he was scared it'd be too late to turn her life around again.

"Beck!" Andre shouted and he turned to him. "It's your turn"

"You've been lost, what are you thinking?" Tori asked curiously and Beck sighed.

"I saw Jade this morning, but it wasn't a nice encounter" He commented.

"Why?" Cat asked.

"She is not okay" Beck said.

"Well, who would be in her situation? We already know that she is having a hard time" Tori commented but he shook his head.

"No, you don't understand…she is NOT okay" Beck affirmed. "She is losing it, she really is"

"What do you mean?" Andre asked worriedly.

"She looked strange when I saw her, she was obviously tired but there was something else…" Beck said.

"What was it?" Robbie asked.

"I don't know, she looked weird" Beck said "And then we went to the kitchen and she started drinking whisky like it was water, she almost finished the bottle in less than ten minutes"

"What time was this?" Andre asked.

"10AM" Beck said stating the obvious with his tone, it hadn't been a normal situation. "You see the problem?"

"Well, drinking in the morning is definitely not a good sign" Tori admitted.

"No, it's not" Beck said and took a breath thinking about it "I've seen Jade in her worst moments, I know her well and believe me, she is not handling things well" He commented worriedly.

"I understand this is bad, but can we blame her? Look where she lives and what she does for a living, I'd be depressed too" Andre commented.

"That doesn't make it better" Beck said annoyed.

"No, it doesn't but I'm just saying…it's understandable" He responded.

"I know and I hate it" Beck said "I could see that she wants our help, but I feel she doesn't trust us"

"What do you mean?" Robbie asked.

"She probably thinks we are not reliable, but it makes sense…her parents never were, so why would we be any different?" Beck asked and took a breath "This is a nightmare"

"We need to get her to come with us to the camping trip" Tori said "Hopefully there we'll finally get her to open up to us and accept our help"

On Monday Jade showed up at school tired and grumpy as usual, she sat in the back of the classroom and simply listened to class, but she was just waiting for it to be over. She'd taken a pill in the morning to be energized but the effect had passed and she just wanted more.

"Very well, I'll see you all tomorrow" Sikowitz said and everyone started leaving, Jade immediately grabbed her backpack and stood up, but his voice stopped her. "Jade, you stay"

"What do you want, Sikowitz?" She asked impatiently.

"Jade, your grades have plummeted…You're about to fail" Sikowitz informed and she looked at him annoyed, the gang had stayed in the classroom to see how the discussion went and they were hoping it would work.

"And?" She asked, she just wanted to leave.

"Well, I am organizing a camping trip where we'll do some acting exercises and I need you to come" He informed and she looked at him annoyed. "Otherwise you won't pass the class"

"What? You can't make me go, just give me an essay or something" Jade said upset.

"No, this is the only way" He responded. "It's gonna be fun, I don't understand your anger" he added.

"I can't go, I have to work" She informed.

"We just need two days" He said and she sighed. "I'm sorry but it's the only way"

"Who else is going to that stupid trip?" Jade asked.

"We are" Andre informed and she turned to them annoyed, she simply rolled her eyes and took a breath. She knew she could ask for the permission and take her day off as well so she'd be just fine, John was on a trip and she knew Ana wouldn't have a problem letting her go.

"Fine, whatever" Jade said to Sikowitz and her friends smiled at each other. "When is it gonna be?" She asked.

"This weekend, we leave Friday and return Sunday" Sikowitz informed and she nodded.

"Is that all?" She asked impatiently.

"Yes" He said and she simply walked out of the classroom. "Well, she didn't love the idea"

"But she is coming and that's what matters" Tori commented.

"Why do you guys want her to go so badly?" Sikowitz questioned.

"It's important" Beck responded. "That's all you need to know"

"Thanks for the help, Sikowitz" Andre added and he nodded.

"Sure, I'll see you all on the weekend"

* * *

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	8. Chapter 8

The day of the camping trip finally came and everyone met up at Hollywood Arts, Jade was partly annoyed she had to go but she was also relieved she wouldn't have to work those nights. They got on a van from the school and took off. Sikowitz was driving, Andre was next to him and the rest were in back but they were all close to the front and Jade was seated in the opposite corner.

"What happened to you face?" Tori asked confused because she had a little bruise on her lip but Jade simply put her hand on it and continued looking out the window, so they looked at each other and Beck moved towards her.

"Hey…" He started but when he was closer, he realized she also had some strangling marks around her neck so his eyes wide opened "Oh my god, what happened to you?" Beck asked concernedly.

"Leave me alone" Jade ordered coldly.

"No, who did this to you?" He questioned seriously but she ignored him "Jade, who did it?" He asked again.

"That's none of your business" She responded and covered her neck as well, so he grabbed her hands to remove them and see her bruises better.

"Who hurt you like this?" Beck demanded upset.

"Get away from me" Jade ordered coldly and moved her hands back aggressively, so he shook his head.

"Please tell me" He said but she ignored him and looked at her phone.

"Beck…" Tori said in resignation because it was clear Jade wasn't going to talk to them there, so he sighed and went back to his friends.

It took them three hours to arrive to the forest and then they set up the camp, there were three tents; one for Sikowitz, one for the boys and one for the girls. They also looked around for wood and brought enough to make the fire.

"We are set!" Sikowitz exclaimed and they all took a seat around the fire; it was already getting dark and they were finally relaxing, all except Jade because she hadn't found a time to take her dose and she was anxious. She'd brought the drugs and vodka, which she had disguised as water; after all that time, the thought of spending two days without them was unbearable to her.

"What are we gonna do these days?" Cat asked curiously.

"Acting exercises but for the most part…it's a relaxation trip" He responded and sat back as he drank from his coconut.

"What sort of acting exercises? Like in class?" Tori asked.

"Yeah, some improvisation using the natural setting as inspiration" He explained and Jade rolled her eyes as she drank some vodka from her bottle.

"Sounds cool" Andre simply said.

"We could have done that in the garden at school" Jade commented coldly.

"But it's prettier out here" Cat said and Jade simply took another sip of vodka as she shook her foot anxiously.

"You seem anxious" Tori commented.

"I'm just tired" She responded and drank more from her bottle, she just wanted to numb out her anxiety, but the alcohol wasn't doing the trick and she needed bigger doses to even feel the effects at that point.

"Can I have some water?" Cat asked her nicely and tried to reach the bottle but Jade moved it back.

"No, get your own" She said coldly and they all looked at each other disconcerted by her reaction, she'd been more aggressive than usual.

"That's okay, Cat, take mine" Tori said as she handed her the bottle and Cat took it, Jade simply took a breath and continued looking at the fire while shaking her foot.

"So Jade, where do you work?" Sikowitz asked to change the topic and the gang looked at her nervously.

"None of your business" She said coldly and started walking away.

"Where are you going?" Beck questioned.

"I'll take a walk" She said and went into the forest.

"Careful, it's dark" Sikowitz said but she ignored him "Jade is being…Jade, I guess" he added as he shook his head and Tori raised an eyebrow at Beck.

"Do you think it's a good moment?" He asked.

"Try" She responded and he stood up. He walked down the same path she had taken but he didn't see her, so he just kept walking and looking around.

"Are you following me?" Jade suddenly asked and he turned around to see her standing there with the bottle in her hand.

"Yes, we need to talk" He said and she rolled her eyes.

"Again?" She said annoyed. "I really don't understand what you wanna hear from me, things are crystal clear"

"No, they are not"

"Let me just say this again so you finally understand" Jade said annoyed. "We broke up, I am a stripper and I want nothing to do with you, is it clicking yet?"

"You know what I mean, Jade" He responded.

"I don't care whatever it is you think you can do for me, but I don't want your pity so just leave me alone" Jade ordered. "And stop following me" she said and drank more from her bottle as she walked past him. He simply went back to his friends and realized Sikowitz had gone to bed.

"How was it?" Tori asked.

"Quick" Andre responded and chuckled so Beck sighed as he took a seat.

"She told me to leave her alone…again" He informed.

"And where is she?" Cat questioned.

"In the forest…walking, she wanted to be away from me" Beck commented.

"Let's go again" Tori said. "But this time all of us, if we all confront her she won't be able to escape"

"She doesn't want to talk" Beck informed. "I don't know if it's the right time, maybe she is not ready"

"She is pushing us away because, as you said, she is afraid that we'll leave her too and she is saving herself the pain, she needs to keep hearing our reassurance that we are here for her" Tori commented and stood up. "Let's go"

"Wait, we need flashlights" Robbie said and went into the tent to get them, then they all started walking into the forest and hoping for the best.

"Where did she go?" Robbie asked after ten minutes of looking for her with no result.

"She couldn't have gotten too far" Andre said.

"Are you sure she went down this path?" Tori asked Beck.

"I think so, I saw h…" Beck started and then they heard leaves cracking, so they aimed their flashlights towards the sound and got a glimpse of Jade's foot moving.

"Jade?" Tori asked as they walked towards her. They reached the tree in matter of seconds and immediately aimed all the flashlights at Jade, who was sitting on the grass still with an elastic band around her left arm.

"What the hell?" Jade asked confused "Get that out of my face" She ordered as she covered her eyes, so they moved the flashlights to the side.

"What are you doing?" Andre asked and she sighed as she rested her head back on the tree and took the elastic band off her arm. She simply put it in her pocket and closed her eyes.

"Just go" She said and they looked at each other disconcertedly.

"What are you doing out h-?" Beck asked but he cut himself off when he got a glimpse of the grass on her side, he leaned down with the flashlight and saw a syringe, so he grabbed it knowing exactly what it meant and stared at it appalled, he had no seen that coming.

"What's that?" Cat asked confused and Beck looked at Tori and Andre concernedly, that was worse than they had expected. He knew it was heroin and suddenly everything clicked, including her attempt to hide her arms from him at her apartment.

"Give me that" Jade said upset and tried to reach the syringe but he shook his head.

"Jade, come on…" Beck said disappointedly. "I can't believe you're actually doing this" He admitted, he was shocked because, even though he knew she had a drinking problem, he had never imagined she was into drugs as well. She was a trainwreck.

"Go" She whispered, at that point she didn't even care.

"Why are you doing this? You know what it can do to you" Tori commented confused. "It could kill you" she added and Jade chuckled.

"Yeah, big deal" She said sarcastically and drank more from her bottle, but Beck grabbed it from her hand. "Give me my water back!" She exclaimed annoyed but her speech was a little off.

"Is this water? You sure?" Beck asked suspiciously but she didn't respond so he smelled the bottle and immediately realized it was vodka. He simply stared at her and shook his head not believing what was happening, Jade was actually an alcoholic and a drug addict; it made him feel so sad, scared and angry at the same time.

"What's the matter?" Tori asked him when she saw his face.

"It's vodka" He informed and Jade sighed while they looked at each other shocked.

"Oh my god, you've been drinking from that bottle all day" Andre commented surprised and she simply stared into space, she was high so everything seemed less important, but she could understand what was happening.

"Aren't you gonna say anything?" Tori asked but she only smiled to herself.

"Yeah, I am" Jade said and looked at them seriously "Fuck off" she ordered and closed her eyes as she relaxed, she just wanted to enjoy her time away from reality.

"She is high, we can't talk like this" Beck commented and took a breath. "Let's go back" He said and picked her up from the grass, she tried to push him back but she felt tired, so she ended up giving in.

Beck and the gang took Jade back to the camp and put her in the tent, she fell asleep within minutes so Cat and Tori looked into her backpack and found a bag of different drugs and more alcohol.

"Found anything?" Andre asked and Tori showed them the bag while Cat held the bottles.

"There's enough drugs for all of us here" Tori commented and sighed sadly. "I can't believe it"

"I told you there was something up, but I never thought it was this bad" He admitted and grabbed the bag, Jade's life was now reduced to a bunch of pills and syringes.

"She is deep into it, isn't she?" Robbie asked.

"It looks like it" Andre said. "You don't bring this many drugs and alcohol to a two-day school trip unless you really need them, it was a risky move so we can only assume she can't handle not having them"

"What are we gonna do?" Robbie asked concernedly.

"We have to confront her about it when she is sober" Beck said. "But I don't think she's gonna play along"  
"But maybe it'll be a little different, as far as we know we haven't seen her sober in god knows how long" Tori commented. "She was always drinking from her bottle"

"Do you guys think she'll accept our help?" Cat asked.

"We have to try" Beck responded. "She can't be left alone, especially not now"

Jade woke up next morning with a hangover, but she was used to it at that point, she usually got rid of it by drinking more so she reached into her bag to take one of her vodka bottles out to replace the water. However, when she started looking for it she didn't find any of her things, the bottles and the drugs were gone so she immediately started panicking.

Cat and Tori were awoken by Jade's searching noises, she was turning the tent upside down trying to find her things. "What's wrong?" Tori asked.

"Where are they?" Jade asked back angrily.

"What do you mean?" Cat questioned.

"My things!" Jade screamed. "You took them"

"Jade…" Tori said nervously and took a breath. "You need help"

"Where are they?" She asked again and started searching through Tori's things.

"They are not here" Tori informed and Jade threw the bag at her violently as she stepped out of the tent only to see Beck, Andre and Robbie standing there with her stuff. "You looking for this?" Beck asked as he showed her the bag of pills and she exhaled upset.

"Give them to me" Jade demanded as Cat and Tori stepped out as well.

"Jade, please let us help you" Andre said as he held her bottles.

"I don't need your help, I need you to give me my things back" Jade said angrily.

"You can't keep going down this path, we won't let you ruin your life like this" Beck informed.

"It's my life and it's already ruined" Jade responded coldly.

"No, it's not" Cat said.

"You have a whole life ahead of you" Tori added and Jade chuckled.

"Yeah? What kind of life?" She questioned. "One where I must strip for drunk men every night to survive?" She asked and they looked at each other sadly. "My dad barely waited eighteen years before he kicked me out of his house and my mother decided she preferred these things over me when I was a baby" Jade commented referring to the drugs. "They never cared, no one does so why would I?"

"We do care! I do care" Beck affirmed.

"You are lying!" Jade exclaimed with tears in her eyes. "You feel only pity for me, I can see it in your eyes"

"You are pretty blind if that's what you see" He responded.

"We only want the best for you" Tori added. "Please Jade, stop this! You are better than this"

"No, I'm really not" Jade said and chuckled as a couple of tears streamed down her face "My boss came back from his trip early, you know? He called me to his office after I finished doing the lap dances last night and made me do one for him, he calls it monthly evaluation…" She commented.

"He does it every month?" Cat asked and she nodded.

"Sometimes more and it gets worse every time, I don't even feel I own my body at this point" Jade said and they felt their hearts crushing "You wanted to know about this, right?" She asked them as she pointed at her neck and lip.

"Yeah…" Tori said and she nodded.

"I was dancing for him and…I felt him unzipping his pants, so I said I had to go and stood up to get away" She commented "But he grabbed my hair and pulled me back, I told him to let me go but he forced me to lay down on the sofa" Jade informed and looked down "Then he got on top of me"

"What?" Beck asked scared and she nodded as a couple of tears streamed down her cheeks.

"I told him to get off and he got mad, so he slapped me and started strangling me…" She added as she held her neck "All while his other disgusting hand slipped under my bra and he smiled at me, he smiled as if I were enjoying it" Jade said angrily as she closed her eyes remembering and they looked at each other nervously, they didn't think that story would end well "I couldn't breathe and I was trying to get him off but he just laughed and said he could do anything he wanted, he called me a whore and said that 'letting him fuck me' was part of my job because he owned me"

"Bastard" Beck said angrily, he could imagine everything she'd said as if he'd witnessed it himself and he felt his blood boiling inside his body.

"Did he…?" Tori asked nervously and Jade sighed.

"No, thank god his business partner arrived, Ana knocked on the door and he got distracted, so I rolled off the sofa and managed to run away before he could do anything else" She informed and sighed "But the point is it wasn't the first time and it won't be the last, soon he'll make me his own personal prostitute and I can't do anything to stop him" she added, frustration and resignation dripping from her voice.

"That's illegal, it's rape and harassment" Tori said. "You don't have to put up with it, you have to tell the police"

"I'm a stripper" Jade responded.

"So? That doesn't give him or anyone the right to touch you against your will" Andre affirmed.

"On paper it doesn't, in real life it does" She commented "He knows no one will believe me, he tells me all the time…"

"What does he tell you?" Beck asked.

"He says he knows my 'kind' and that if I even think about saying anything to the cops, he'll deny it and even have me arrested as punishment" She responded.

"Arrested for what?" Andre asked confused and she shrugged.

"He doesn't need a real reason, he can accuse me of drug smuggling or prostitution for that matter and he will prove it even if it's not true, which means only I lose either way" Jade said.

"So, you'll just let that bastard abuse you?" Beck asked shocked.

"I don't have a choice" Jade said in rage and resignation "You know what that means? If it's not my disgusting landlord, it'll be my boss but at the end of the day, I'll end up like a whore, so I really don't need you to tell me what the best way to handle my life is" She said as more tears streamed down her cheeks and they shook their heads.

"No, that's not what your life will be like" Beck affirmed.

"Give me my things back" Jade demanded.

"No, these things are killing you" Tori said and she chuckled.

"You're wrong" Jade responded "These things are the only reason I haven't killed myself yet"

* * *

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	9. Chapter 9

Jade spent the rest of the weekend shutting her friends away, she felt sick and she just wanted to go back home, she'd never imagined she would miss that place, but her addiction was stronger than her hatred for it. They didn't tell Sikowitz about the drugs or the alcohol, so he just thought Jade's aggressiveness was her usual personality and on Sunday morning they all went back to the city.

Jade arrived home feeling extremely anxious, she was shaky and she felt more anxiety than ever before, she'd never imagined seeing her mother would be such a great relief but ever since she'd started taking drugs, she felt a lot closer to her.

"Hey there" Lorraine said.

"I need something right now" Jade said and Lorraine smiled.

"Oh, I got something for you" She responded and Jade smiled. "How was your trip?"

"Terrible, just give it to me" Jade said impatiently and her mother walked into the kitchen.

"How about breakfast first?" Lorraine asked as she poured a glass of whisky and gave it to her.

"Yes please" Jade responded coldly and drank up the glass.

"Good girl" She said.

"What'd you get?" Jade asked anxiously and her mother put all the drugs on the table; there were some pills, some cocaine and also heroin so she smiled. Lorraine prepared the heroin for Jade to snort and put it on a spoon.

"There you go, love" Lorraine said as Ana walked into the kitchen and saw Jade snorting off the spoon while her mother stared at her smiling.

"What the hell is going on?" Ana asked upset.

"What are you doing here? How did you get in?" Lorraine asked.

"The door was open" Ana said and turned to Jade, who was looking down ashamedly as she wiped her nose. "You gave drugs to your own daughter, are you fucking serious?" She asked angrily.

"Ana please go, I'll see you tonight" Jade said annoyed and served another glass of whisky.

"Stop it, it's not even noon yet! You shouldn't be drinking" Ana said and took the glass from Jade's hand.

"I do what I want" Jade said and served more on another glass, she simply stared at Ana and drank it up.

"So, you just stand there and watch this happen?" Ana asked Lorraine. "You just let your daughter become an alcoholic and a drug addict like you?"

"That's none of your fucking business, she is an adult and she can make her own choices" Lorraine said annoyed.

"She is a CHILD!" Ana screamed angrily. "And she doesn't need someone to give her drugs, she needs someone to protect her and care for her, that's what being a parent is!"

"Get out of my house" Lorraine said and Ana nodded. "We are fine, aren't we honey?" she asked almost cynically but Jade was too high to even care "Yeah, I think she is fine" she said and laughed.

"I've seen enough, you are clearly not fit to be a mother" Ana said coldly and grabbed Jade's arm. "Let's go"

"Go where?" Jade asked confused.

"I hadn't said anything out of the little respect I had for your mother, but I can't watch you destroy your life, you're coming to live with me" Ana said and made Jade stand up.

"You can't take her" Lorraine said upset and pushed Jade to the side.

"Why? Because you'll lose your meal ticket? Sorry, but I think it's time for you to grow up" Ana responded and grabbed Jade's hand again, but she moved it back. "Jade, let's go"

"I'm not going" She informed.

"You are not thinking straight, come with me" Ana insisted but Jade knew that going with her meant giving up her drug addiction and she wasn't willing to do it.

"I said no, this is my life and my choices" Jade informed. "Leave"

"Jade please" Ana said.

"I'll see you tonight" Jade simply said and grabbed the bottle of whisky before going into her room.

"You heard her" Lorraine said and Ana sighed mortified but she had to leave. She knew exactly why Jade had turned her down but that just made her feel worse, she regretted not getting her away from her mother sooner.

After that night, Jade started avoiding Ana as much as she could and she showed up at work already high so there was not a lot to be done anyway. Ana continued trying to get to her, but she was an adult and she couldn't help her if Jade didn't allow her, so she decided to get in touch with her friends and maybe get some assistance.

"Hi guys, thanks for letting me come" Ana said as she walked into Tori's living room.

"You said you know Jade?" Tori asked.

"Yes, I'm the manager at the club she works in" She responded and they looked at each other.

"What do you want?" Beck asked coldly.

"I'm worried about her, I don't know if you are aware of this, but she has been taking drugs…for a while now" Ana commented and they sighed.

"We know, we caught her" Andre said.

"She also has a drinking problem" Robbie added and Ana nodded.

"I've tried to talk to her, but she refuses my help" Ana said.

"She doesn't want ours either" Tori said sadly.

"It's the addiction talking, I know that" Ana affirmed "But we can't give up"

"With all due respect, she is like this because she is working in that place, so I don't understand why you're surprised" Beck said upset.

"I care about her, believe me and if it were up to me, she wouldn't be working there" She responded "We need to get her away from Lorraine, that woman is toxic"

"We asked our parents but we can't have her live with us forever, it would be just a few weeks and she has turned us down anyway" Tori commented.

"I was thinking about moving out and renting a small place with her, if we both get part time jobs and with my savings, it should be enough" Beck commented "But she doesn't want me around, I don't know what else to tell her"

"She loves you, dear, I can tell you that much" Ana affirmed "But she is pretty sure you just feel compassion for her now"

"I've told her a thousand times that I love her, I don't understand" He said disconcertedly.

"I know, but she is…ashamed and she is afraid of taking your offer because she doesn't trust anyone and going with you would make her feel even more unstable" Ana commented.

"Because she thinks I would eventually leave her too" Beck said sadly.

"Not to mention she thinks you're doing it because you feel obligated to" Ana added and he sighed.

"Then what am I supposed to do?" Beck asked.

"Listen, the important thing right now is to get her away from Lorraine, she keeps feeding her addiction" Ana affirmed "I want to take her home with me, it's about time"

"You want her to live with you?" Cat asked and Anna nodded.

"I should've asked her to move in with me months ago, but now she is addicted to those things and she knows that leaving her mother means leaving the drugs too, so she turned me down" Ana said.

"So, what's your plan?" Tori asked.

"I want us to go to her apartment together" Ana said "She can't make rational choices as long as she is addicted, so I was thinking we could get her out even if she says no"

"You mean like…kidnap her?" Robbie asked.

"Sort of, we outnumber Lorraine and she won't be able to stop us" Ana commented "I know it's drastic, but this is important and it's for her own good"

"I agree" Beck said and the gang looked at each other, they weren't convinced but Ana was right, it was a desperate situation "When?" He asked.

"Tonight, she must be at the club right now but it's Tuesday, so she'll be home a little earlier" Lorraine informed and Beck nodded.

"Great, then we'll do it tonight"

That night Jade arrived from work and found Lorraine fixing herself and her date a drink, so she joined them in the kitchen "Hey hon" Lorraine said and gave her a glass as well.

"Hey" Jade simply said while her mother served her some vodka.

"You look tired" The guy commented.

"No shit" She responded sarcastically and drank up the alcohol.

"How was work?" Lorraine asked nicely, ever since Jade had started taking drugs and drinking alcohol, their relationship had improved, they finally felt like mother and daughter.

"Same as ever" She responded as she poured more vodka in her glass.

"Where do you work?" The man questioned curiously.

"In the club down the street" Lorraine informed and the man smiled.

"Really? That is interesting" He said.

"No, it's not" Jade simply said and took another sip.

"Are you any good?" He asked.

"She is the best" Her mother affirmed and Jade sat back just looking at them emotionlessly.

"I would like to see that" The man said.

"Wasn't I good enough? Do you want another?" Lorraine asked chuckling as she put her hand on his penis and opened her mouth licking her lips.

"I gave you all the sweeties, didn't I?" The man said and kissed her, while Jade served yet another glass of vodka "But I like new experiences and she is your daughter, I have high expectations" He added as he broke the kiss.

"Honey, my friend here likes you" Lorraine said smiling as she sat on his lap and they stared at Jade.

"I'm off to bed" Jade simply said and stood up, but the man held her hand.

"Come on, the night is young, let's have a party" He said.

"I have a test tomorrow" She responded and looked at Lorraine "I need to relax, give me some" she demanded and her mother nodded.

"Sure, honey" Lorraine said and reached the bag on the table to grab a syringe and some heroin, but the man stopped her.

"How about you show me your talents and I give you something even better?" The man said to Jade.

"I'm really not in the mood" She commented and he stood up.

"Let's get you in the mood, baby" He said and handed her his glass, so she drank it up and returned it.

"What's the 'better' thing?" Jade asked curiously and the man smiled as he stepped closer to her.

"You know how to get it, do it and I'll tell you" He commented and she looked at Lorraine, who simply smiled and nodded.

"A show?" Jade asked.

"That's right, your mom says you're the best and I'd like to confirm it" The man said.

"Do it, baby" Her mother said and she sighed.

"I think I need more alcohol for that" Jade commented and walked over to the cabinet, she felt a little drunk already but she wanted more, so she grabbed a new bottle of whisky and poured herself a big glass.

"That's what I'm talking about" The man said and laughed "Let's do this"

The three of them walked to the living room and brought all the alcohol and drugs with them, the man took a seat on the sofa and Lorraine sat across the room to watch. Jade simply played some music and started doing a lap dance for him, she took her jacket and her top off, but she kept her jeans on because she wasn't planning on sleeping with him.

"That's my baby!" Lorraine cheered and laughed from behind while Jade aroused the man on the sofa.

Jade got on top of him and he put his hands on her hips, he was really enjoying himself and she didn't really care at that point, she was used to men touching her "Have some more, honey" Lorraine said as she poured whisky into her mouth from the bottle and then poured some more all over her chest, so the man smiled and licked it off of her skin.

Jade was really drunk at that point, so she just laughed and grabbed the bottle from her mother's hand to drink some more, she finished it up and the man smiled "So, what's that amazing thing you promised me?" Jade asked but she was mumbling at that point.

"Let's get you warmed up first" The man said as he got her off him and prepared some lines of heroin on the center table, so she smiled and got on her knees next to him. He snorted a line of the drug and then let her take her turn.

"Leave me some" Lorraine said as she served herself another glass of whisky and the man got behind Jade, he embraced her and started touching her and kissing her shoulder while she leaned her face down to take the drug.

They had left the door open, so Ana and the gang walked into the apartment freely just in time to see a shirtless Jade on her knees snorting heroin off the center table while an older man embraced her from behind and kissed her neck. They knew about her addiction, but to see her like that was shocking for them, it was like seeing a younger version of Lorraine, so they just stood there frozen.

"Good girl" The man said as he grabbed her neck and kissed her cheek, he then grabbed her breasts on top of her bra and made her stand up because he wanted to get her back on the sofa. Beck simply stared at her appalled and upset at the same time, he didn't even know what he felt.

"Wait...no…" Jade mumbled and tried to lean down to reach her shirt, which was on the floor but she tripped and started laughing as she crawled towards it, she grabbed it and tried to put it back on but the man, who was clearly more sober, took it off again and threw it away.

"You don't need this, you look better without it" The man commented and she tried to stand up but she kept stumbling so she was just laughing on the floor. Ana and the gang didn't really know what to do, they hadn't expected to find her like that and she was clearly not in conditions to have a rational conversation.

"Don't you want that special thing I promised?" The man asked as he held her chin up to make her look at him because she was still on her knees. "It's a magic pill, it feels like heaven" He added as he showed her a little bag with pills and she tried to reach it, but he put it away.

"Uh oh! You need to pay for it first, honey" He said and she simply crawled towards the table, she leaned her face down to snort the other line of heroin and he got on his knees behind her again, he held her hips up with a smile on his face and stroked her on top of the jeans, Lorraine simply laughed and threw a condom at him, so everyone stared at her shocked.

"Take her pants off and make it quick, I want a magic pill too" Lorraine said, none of them had seen the gang or Ana because they were facing the other side.

Ana and the gang hadn't said or done anything because they were processing and trying to understand what they were witnessing, but then it became clear and it just broke their hearts to see Jade like that. She was about to let a man have sex with her in exchange for drugs and she'd clearly just stripped for him for the same reasons. They were watching her snort the remaining heroin off the table while the man set her body in position by making her open her thighs more, it was disturbing and heartbreaking at the same time.

"You were right…" The man said as he smiled at Lorraine, so she chuckled, but then Jade raised her torso to get back up.

"No, wait…" Jade mumbled but he put his hand on the back of her head and smashed her face against the table.

"Stay down" The man ordered coldly as he kept Jade's head down with his hand and he started opening his pants.

"Don't you dare" Beck ordered angrily as he walked towards him and they turned to the door, so they finally saw them.

"Who are you all?" He asked as he stood up and Jade raised her head because he was no longer keeping her down, so they saw she had some blood on her nose and a red mark across the right side of her face from getting smashed onto the table.

"You bastard" Beck said angrily and punched him on the face.

"Beck…" Andre said and grabbed his arm to hold him back.

"Get out of my house, this is a private party" Lorraine said annoyed

"Hey" Jade said while she sat down on the floor and started laughing, she was clearly wasted and high, so she hadn't even realized she'd been hit.

"What are you doing?" Beck asked her clearly angry, but she simply laid back on the floor.

"That's none of your business, get out" The man said upset as he touched his lip to check for blood after the punch.

"You were gonna let this man rape your daughter in front of you for a bag of pills? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Ana asked Lorraine furiously.

"She is into it" Lorraine responded.

"She can't possibly consent right now, just look at her" Ana said angrily and they all looked at Jade, who was simply staring at the ceiling completely lost "And look at what this beast did to her face!"

"She wants the pills and nothing's for free, as for the hit…she should've kept her head down" Lorraine commented and they stared at her appalled "She is old enough to start earning her own candies"

"You are a disgrace, Lorraine, how many times has this happened? How many times have you allowed strangers to sexually abuse your child?" Ana asked and Lorraine rolled her eyes.

"God, you're so dramatic" She responded "This is her first time, but she looks okay to me, maybe it's time to tell the landlord she is ready" she added chuckling and the gang glared at her angrily.

"Go to hell" Ana said and walked towards Jade "Come on, get up…we are leaving" She ordered as she helped her to stand up, but she was barely conscious at that point.

"Here's her shirt and her jacket" Tori said as she handed Jade's clothes to Ana, she simply put them back on her and grabbed her hand to make her walk with them, she was like a puppet so it was easy.

"You know she'll come back tomorrow, she loves me" Lorraine said sarcastically and chuckled as she walked towards the man.

"We were having a great time, Jade included…and it was about to get even better" The man commented.

"She'll be back soon to try those magic pills, so…hold that thought" Lorraine said and he smirked.

"You are disgusting" Beck said to Lorraine and turned to the man "And you better stay away from her" He threatened while Ana wiped away the blood streaming down Jade's nose.

"Don't worry, she'll come to me" The man said cynically and Beck tried to step towards him again but Tori stopped him.

"Let's just go" She said and he sighed, they simply left the apartment hoping Jade would never have to be there again.

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	10. Chapter 10

Jade could barely walk so Beck held her in his arms and walked all the way downstairs with her, then they got in the car and went to Ana's house, he set her on the sofa, took her jacket off to make her more comfortable and Ana put a blanket on her, but she was asleep at that point.

"I can't believe this just happened" Tori said sincerely "Look at her face…that's gonna be a huge bruise" she added.

"If we hadn't arrived in time…" Andre added.

"I know" Beck said and sighed, it had been really uncomfortable for him to see her like that because she was laughing and allowing the man to do it, but he knew she'd been drunk and drugged so he was trying to be understanding.

"I don't know what the hell goes inside Lorraine's mind, she just keeps getting worse" Ana commented.

"It's like she is purposefully trying to destroy Jade, it's sick" Tori added.

"Yes, she is and I don't know why" Ana responded and sat down on the other sofa as she stared at Jade, so she saw all the injection marks on her arms "How did this poor girl get to this point? Why did I allow it?" She asked sadly as a couple of tears streamed down her cheeks.

"You really care about her, don't you?" Cat asked and Ana nodded.

"I could see it, I could see she was losing it and I didn't do enough to help her and now she is turning into her mother" Ana said and looked down ashamedly.

"You think she would've done what she was doing if she had been a little more sober?" Beck asked sincerely.

"No, I don't think she is at that point yet…but it takes one time to send the message" Ana said.

"What do you mean?" Cat asked.

"If she had slept with that man tonight, I think that would've just triggered her and she would probably end up doing it regularly because it would no longer matter, in her mind she'd be just like Lorraine and I can't say she is wrong, right now that's the only real difference between them" Ana commented sadly "Lorraine doesn't think sex is a big deal and she always trades it for drugs, but Jade doesn't feel that way…at least not her sober self" she added and Beck looked down.

"But part of her does, she was willing to do it tonight" He commented.

"Until she wasn't…and then that man smashed her face against the table" Andre added "I mean, she even tried to put her shirt back on, she wasn't really loving the idea of sleeping with him…not even drunk"

"I know, but she still stripped for him and let him touch her" Beck said annoyed.

"Yeah, well…I guess she wanted the drugs" Andre commented.

"You have the right to be upset, you know? It's okay, we won't judge and we won't tell her" Tori said to him but he looked at Jade and all he could feel was sadness and frustration, he couldn't believe his former girlfriend had become what he was seeing. He wanted to be angry, he wanted to blame her and he wanted to stop loving her to spare himself the pain of seeing her destroy herself, but he just couldn't.

"They are right, you can be upset but I know for a fact she loves you, Beck, so please don't give up on her, I know you must probably be thinking she isn't worth it and that she doesn't deserve your love because of what she's done, but please, I beg you, don't hold this against her and especially do NOT call her a whore for it" Ana said and he sighed as he stared at Jade sadly "Believe me, her own guilt is bad enough and she feels she is a whore anyway, so no need to make it worse"

"Why would I call her a whore?" Beck asked.

"You've done it before for less than what you saw today" Ana commented and he looked down ashamedly "I'm not judging you, I understand you must be feeling angry with her and you have reasons, but I know you love her and I just don't want you to give up just yet, she doesn't deserve more people giving up on her…every important person in her life has done it and that's sent her a message, that's why she doesn't think any of you will stick around now that her life is no longer convenient" She added sadly "Please don't prove her right, not now"

"I…" Beck started but she cut him off.

"Listen, if we leave her alone with this, she'll just keep digging herself deeper" Ana affirmed and they looked at each other "She clearly doesn't measure herself so she might end up overdosing and no one will be there to stop her, if not us"

"I wasn't planning on leaving her or insulting her, I'm not an idiot" Beck said and sighed "I know she is not well and I know that she is doing all of this because she is sick"

"So, you're not mad about tonight?" Ana asked him surprised and he thought about it.

"Under different circumstances, I would be" He admitted "And you're right, I would probably call her every name on the book and just move on, but I can't do that, it would be unfair"

"You really feel that way? I mean, we all saw her, Beck, you can be honest" Robbie commented.

"What we saw was an addict, completely wasted and high, at the hands of her twisted mother and that perv" Beck responded "Ana is right, she couldn't have consented and she didn't, that's why he hit her…but whatever, even if she had consented, she can't make any rational choice as long as those things control her life"

"Wow…I did not expect this reaction from you" Ana admitted and smiled at him "You've grown a lot in the past few months"

"Yeah, that's really mature" Tori added and he sighed.

"No, it's not that" Beck responded "I tried to hate her, I tried to get away from her but then I realized how stupid that made me, I love her…I really do and I can't let my ego get in the way of that, it's not worth it" He affirmed and looked at her "But she is"

"She is lucky to have you" Tori said and smiled at him, so he smiled back.

"We'll get her through this" Ana affirmed and held his hand, so he nodded "She is with us now and she's safe"

The gang stayed at Ana's house that night to take care of Jade and next morning she opened her eyes feeling a terrible headache, she didn't remember much from the previous night other than doing the lap dance for the man, after that everything was blurry and she didn't know where she was, so she sat up confused and then she felt pain on her face so she stroked her cheek softly.

Jade looked around and didn't recognize anything, so she was afraid she'd left with her mother's dealer and her eyes started filling with tears as she imagined what had happened, she removed the blanket and stood up to look for her things, but she only saw her jacket on one of the sofas, she hadn't brought her backpack so she didn't even have her phone.

Jade walked out of the living room heading to the front door but then she heard noises coming from the kitchen, she wanted to verify what she already suspected so she walked to the kitchen and opened the door, but to her surprise, the dealer wasn't there, it was Ana and her friends so she looked at them confused.

"Honey, you're awake" Ana said and Jade wiped her tears away, it was relaxing to know she hadn't left with the man.

"Why are you crying?" Cat asked confused.

"I…I didn't know where I was, I thought I'd left with…" She started but she was ashamed to say it.

"With that man?" Beck asked and she looked at him mortified.

"Why am I here?" Jade asked back.

"We went to your apartment last night and we found you…" Tori said.

"You found me…? How do you know about the man?" She questioned suspiciously and they looked at each other.

"He was with you" Cat responded and they saw Jade trying to remember but it clear she couldn't.

"What was I doing?" Jade asked.

"That's not important" Beck said and she stared at him confused.

"Tell me" Jade demanded.

"Jade, when we arrived you were snorting drugs in your living room…and that man was about to have sex with you" Lorraine explained and Jade stared at her scared.

"What?" Jade asked clearly confused "I…I agreed to it?" She asked and they looked at each other.

"He said it was the price for some pills he had" Andre explained and she looked at him mortified "But Jade, you were wasted, you didn't agree to it consciously and he smashed your face against the table when you tried to get up, it wasn't your fault" He added to make her feel better.

"Don't sugarcoat it" Jade simply responded and sighed "I remember stripping for him, I don't remember most of it, but I guess things escalated…and I allowed it"

"Love, it's okay…nothing happened, we got there in time" Ana informed and smiled nicely.

"I'm gonna go…" Jade simply said and started walking towards the door, so they followed her.

"No way, you're not going back there" Beck said as he stepped in her way "Do you realize what could've happened last night? That man was about to take advantage of you and your mother let him"

"Is that supposed to surprise me?" Jade asked coldly "I stripped for him in exchange for drugs, he must've thought it was okay and maybe it was, I wanted the pills and I had to pay for it somehow" she added emotionlessly.

"Come on, you can't be saying this right now" He responded "You are not this, Jade, you're not like your mother"

"I wouldn't be so sure" Jade said sincerely as a couple of tears streamed down her face and he shook his head.

"No, this isn't going to be your life, things will change and you'll leave all this behind you" Beck affirmed "But you need to let us help you first" He added.

"Exactly" Anna said "You will move in with me, so you no longer have to deal with Lorraine or that landlord or even John and the customers"

"What?" Jade asked confused and surprised "You really want me to live with you?"

"Oh honey, it took me long enough…I should've done this months ago" Ana responded. "I didn't want to hurt Lorraine, but she is not a good mother, she never will be"

"I'm adult and this is my life, I can face it alone, I'm ready" Jade affirmed.

"But you don't have to" Ana responded.

"This is really nice of you, but it's not your responsibility, so I'll just go back home and you all can move on" She responded emotionlessly.

"And let you destroy your life? No, it's not happening" Beck informed.

"If you stay there, tonight or tomorrow or in a week your mother will let that man rape you and not only him, she talked about your landlord too and it won't stop there" Andre added and Jade stared at them upset.

"You are not ready for that and you don't ever have to be" Beck affirmed.

"Please love, stop making things harder on yourself" Ana said and held her hands. "You are more than welcome to live with me, it'll be just us"

"What about my mother?" Jade asked. "If I leave, she…"

"She will continue to do what she's been doing for years, she is toxic and abusive and you don't have to deal with her problems" Ana affirmed. "She is a grown up and it's despicable that she's put you through this when she should have always protected you, but you know what's even worse? That she is willing to watch you ruin your life like she ruined hers and do nothing about it"

"She is right" Tori said and Jade looked to the side sadly because she knew that was true.

"But…" Jade said, she wasn't sure about accepting her offer.

"I know you are scared, and I know you don't know if you can truly trust anyone" Ana commented. "But you can trust me and I will be here for you from now on, you are not alone" She affirmed and grabbed Jade's face as she looked into her eyes. "Do you understand me? You are NOT alone and you never will be again, I promise you" she affirmed and several tears started streaming down her cheeks.

Ana simply embraced her in her arms and her friends stared at them with sad smiles, it was obvious Jade had been carrying a giant burden for months and she was finally allowing people to get close and share the weight with her.

"Also, you are quitting the club…I can't afford to have you around drugs, alcohol and John every night" Ana informed.

"But…even if I move here, I need the money to help you with things" Jade said.

"No, you don't, you need to go back to school and be a teenager, you've been a grown up long enough" Ana affirmed and smiled as she stroked Jade's cheek.

"Are you sure about this?" Jade asked confused.

"Of course I'm sure" She responded "This isn't the stardom you deserve, love" she added and Jade smiled as more tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Thank you so much for doing this" Beck said to Ana.

"You don't have to thank me, I'm doing it because I want to" She affirmed and smiled at Jade, so she smiled awkwardly. She felt strange to be accepting help from someone who wasn't even related to her, but the truth was she couldn't handle living her life anymore and she was on a death wish taking all the drugs and alcohol she could, but unfortunately, her dependence to them couldn't be simply erased.

"See? It's all going to be better now" Tori said happily and Jade sighed, she was glad but part of her only wanted to run back to her mother, because she knew she wouldn't be able to have any drugs or alcohol if she stayed with Ana.

"Umm…can I have a drink?" Jade randomly asked and their smiles slowly dropped, but they could see she was anxious.

"Coffee? Water?" Beck said and she rolled her eyes annoyed.

"I'm not joking" She said.

"You have a problem" Andre commented.

"Really? I hadn't noticed" Jade responded sarcastically.

"Jade, you can't keep going like this" Beck said as she looked to the side annoyed but then she remembered she had some pills left in her pocket.

"Could I have coffee then?" She asked Ana and she nodded, they imagined she'd given up but she was only really trying to distract them. They all walked back to the kitchen to get the coffee and Jade discreetly reached into her pocket to grab the pill, so she smiled a little.

"I'll go to the bathroom" Jade said and tried to walk out but Beck saw her hand and stared at her suspiciously.

"Let me see your hand" He demanded.

"Get out of my way" Jade ordered and tried to walk away, but he grabbed her arm to stop her and reached into her pocket only to find a few pills in it.

"Bathroom, uh?" Beck said and took the pills from her.

"Give them back" She demanded.

"No, these things are killing you" He affirmed and put them in his pocket where she wouldn't be able to reach them. "You need help, professional help"

"Just this once please, it's the last time I promise" Jade said and opened her hand. "Give it to me, I need it"

"No, I'm sorry" Beck responded and took a breath. "I know you hate me right now but it's for your own good and you know it"

"Go to hell" Jade said and started walking away.

"Where are you going?" Ana asked.

"Away from you people" She responded and Andre immediately got in the way.

"No, you are not" He informed and Beck walked towards her as well.

"You can't keep me here" She affirmed.

"Yes, we can and we will" Beck said and she glared at him angrily "Whatever it takes to get you off these things"

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	11. Chapter 11

Jade was sent to a recovery clinic for three months and it was the most painful experience of her life, she'd never imagined rehab would be so difficult but it was, she felt she would die a lot of times and she even felt she hated Ana and her friends for sending her there. However, when she came out, she felt a lot better. She still had the urge to drink and take drugs frequently, but she'd managed to fight it and Ana also made sure to never give her too much cash in case she gave in to the addiction.

"Hey, how are ya?" Beck asked as he and the gang approached Jade in school and she simply turned to him.

"I'm okay" She responded and continued looking at her phone.

"You've been out for a month now, how does it feel?" Tori asked gladly.

"Okay I guess" Jade said, the truth was she sometimes missed the drugs but that was the challenge: to always resist.

"Why are you sad?" Cat asked.

"I'm not sad" She responded coldly.

"Yes, you are, it's obvious…You're sad or worried about something" Tori commented.

"It's my mom" Jade said and they looked at each other.

"Have you visited her?" Robbie asked.

"No but she's probably still in that shithole trading sex for drugs and sleeping with the landlord, since she couldn't get me to do it" Jade commented and they looked at her sadly.

"Don't think about that" Andre said.

"It's my mom" She responded.

"That woman gave birth to you but she is not your mom, Ana is more of a mother than Lorraine has ever been" Beck commented and Jade sighed.

"I know but…still" She said. "I want to know if she is okay"

"Seeing that woman is not good for you, just try not to think about her" Tori said and Jade nodded but that afternoon she took a cab to her former building, she needed to see her mother and she wasn't going to let anyone stop her.

"Mom?" Jade asked as she approached the apartment, which was open but no one responded so she let herself in. "Mom? It's me" she said.

"What are you doing here?" Lorraine asked as she stepped into the apartment, her clothes were dirty, her hair was messy and she was carrying a little bag of pills. She had not changed at all.

"I came to see you" Jade informed and stepped towards her.

"You came to see me after you betrayed me?" Her mother asked angrily and laughed as she walked past them to get to the kitchen. "I don't want to see you, leave"

"Mom, you need help" Jade said.

"Help? You mean I should let them lock me up like they did to you?" Lorraine asked.

"I got better" Jade responded.

"Get out of my sight, you fucking traitor, you are just like your father" Lorraine said and grabbed a glass to serve herself some vodka. "I should've aborted you"

"Please let me help you" Jade insisted and her mother chuckled.

"God, they really made a number on you, uh?" She commented as she walked around her daughter. "I think you're the one who needs help"

"How is that?" Jade asked coldly.

"You think your life is better because you got 'clean'? No, baby, don't fool yourself…You will never be clean" Lorraine affirmed.

"I am clean" She affirmed and her mother smiled cynically.

"Really? So, you never wish you could get a shot and relax? Don't you ever wish to drink a glass of vodka and forget? You actually go through your life knowing what you are and doing nothing about it?" Lorraine asked.

"What I am? What is that supposed to mean?" Jade asked annoyed.

"You know what it means, you're a stripper, a whore and nothing you do can ever change that" Lorraine said and chuckled. "You really think all your little friends and that Beck guy will forget about it? Oh no darling, that's what you always will be to them"

"That's not true, you just want to hurt me and it won't work" Jade responded.

"I'm not trying to do anything, I'm just telling the truth" She commented. "You deep inside know I'm right"

"Why do you say this to me? Why can't you just be a normal mother?" Jade asked sincerely.

"Other mothers would have their children believe the world is fair and nice, I tell you the truth instead" She responded. "But I do love you, honey and because of that, I'm going to help you forget, I'll help you feel better" she said as she opened Jade's hand and put the bag of drugs in it.

"No, I don't want it" Jade said and tried to give it back, but Lorraine simply closed her hand and made her hold them.

"Maybe not now, but you will soon enough and I know that bitch won't let you buy them" Lorraine affirmed referring to Ana. "Now go, go on…If you need more, you know where to find me" she said and Jade looked at her hand nervously; part of her knew she had to leave the drugs to avoid temptation but she wanted to believe she could control it so she simply put them in her bag and walked away.

One night, Jade and the gang went to the club because Jade had forgotten the house keys and she thought John wouldn't be there, it was still early so the place was empty and Ana was nowhere to be seen.

"Let's wait here, she must be in the dressing room" Jade said and they nodded as they stood near the door.

"Well, well look who is here" John said as he stepped out of his office and they all turned to him. "I knew you would come back to where you belong"

"In your dreams" Jade responded. "I hate this place"

"I can't believe how ungrateful you are" He commented and shook his head. "You were nothing before I made you my…" He started and she raised an eyebrow waiting for the word.

"Watch your words" Beck warned and John smiled.

"I think you all know what I meant to say" He responded.

"Star, of course" Jade said with irony and he chuckled.

"Oh honey, I do miss having you on my lap" John said cynically. "Those hips, that waist, those…" He said as he looked at her from top to bottom and she stared at him angrily.

"Shut up, you piece of trash" Beck ordered.

"I'm just telling the truth, you should've seen her…she is a natural" John said and smiled at Jade "And speaking of your wonderful months here, we have some unfinished business" he said and bit his lip "Let's go to my office" He added as he grabbed her arm but she pulled it back.

"Go fuck yourself" Jade said and stepped away from him "I can't deal with you anymore, I'll be waiting outside" she informed and walked towards the door only to see her former landlord walking in, alongside one of his friends.

"Hey there, doll" He said

"You remember Jade? She came by to visit" John commented.

"Of course I remember" The man said "I miss seeing your pretty face in the building"

"Go to hell" Jade said and tried to walk back to her friends, but John grabbed her arm.

"Not so fast, hon, you just arrived" John said.

"Get your hands off me" She demanded but he pushed her back to the other two men, who simply received her.

"I think you owe me something" The landlord said on her ear and she stepped away from them.

"No, she doesn't but I do" Beck said as he pushed Jade behind him and punched the man on the face, he dropped to the ground and Beck kicked him but then the man's friend pushed him back.

"Careful" He said and grabbed a pistol from his pants, so Beck stopped.

"How about you leave the gun and fight me like a man? Or what? You're only a man when it comes to harassing women?" Beck asked upset.

"Listen kid, I got no beef with you so just fuck off, all of you" John said to him and the gang.

"Let's just go" Tori said nervously and Beck took a breath upset but he knew she was right, they couldn't win a fight against guns.

"I agree, this place stinks" Jade said and they all started walking to the entrance but John held Jade's arm.

"No, not you sweetheart" He said as he pulled her back and she looked at him confused.

"Get your hands off her" Beck ordered and tried to grab her hand, but the landlord took the pistol from his friend's hand and stepped in between them.

"You better get going now" The man threatened as he put the gun on Beck's chest.

"What are you doing? Let me go" Jade demanded angrily and scared.

"You and I were in the middle of something the last time you were in my office and it's time for you to finish it" John said as he put his arms around her body and put her close to him.

"Back off!" Jade said terrified and tried to push him back, but he was stronger.

"Please let her go, please" Tori said scared.

"No, you have to go" Jade's landlord said.

"I won't leave her here, you pig" Beck responded ignoring the fact he had a gun to his chest.

"How about now?" The man asked as he put the pistol to his forehead and pulled down the lock.

"NO! Don't shoot, please don't shoot" Jade begged terrified.

"You have to the count of ten to leave my property" John informed. "One. Two. Three…" He started counting but Beck didn't move, he kept staring at the man coldly.

"I'm not leaving without her" Beck informed.

"Six. Seven. Eight…" John continued.

"Beck go, GO!" Jade ordered.

"I won't leave you here" He insisted. "Let her go!" He said to John, but he only smiled and held her tighter.

"He broke into my property, it's dark, we can't see him so we shot him because we thought he was a thief, the same goes for your other friends, they will be a bunch of corpses in a few seconds and no one will blame us, you know that" John said behind Jade's ear as she stared at Beck and her friends.

"Don't listen to him" Beck said.

"Aww look at that, someone actually cares about you" He said with irony "Are you willing to let him and your little friends die for you?" John asked as she took several breaths because she was panicking "They could be dead in a minute"

"And I could tell the police what you did" Jade said coldly but he only chuckled.

"You? Do you think the word of a junkie is going to stand against ours? And, as if that weren't enough to doom you, let's add the fact you are a long term prostitute" He commented.

"That's not true" Jade responded.

"Oh but it is, I'll have 20 men backing me up tomorrow" John said "Including my friend here" He said referring to the landlord.

"You lived in my building, doll, I saw all those guys coming in and out every night, I asked why and you offered your service, so I fucked you every night for months in exchange for money" Her landlord said and laughed cynically so John smiled.

"You also fucked our customers and I found out what you were doing so I fired you because it's illegal, you're a sour former employee and you are lying to get revenge" He added. "Add that to your record and ask yourself, who would you believe?"

"You bastard" Andre said angrily.

"You have a decision to make, darling" John said and kissed her cheek cynically.

"Leave" Jade said to her friends and Beck shook his head.

"No way, I won't let him hurt you" He responded.

"Beck, please…" She said, she was scared but she didn't want them to hurt her friends and she knew they would.

"No!" Beck responded.

"Calm down, Romeo, it'll be just for tonight and then she'll be all yours again" The landlord commented and the three men laughed while Jade stared at them trembling and trying not to cry.

"I'm going to fucking kill you" Beck said and stepped forward, so the landlord chuckled.

"Brave kid" He said as he looked at the gun still on Beck's chest.

"Look what he is doing for you, I'm moved" John said sarcastically "He is willing to die for a whore like you, do you really think you're worth it?" He asked Jade.

"Stop talking to her" Beck ordered.

"Tell your boyfriend to leave because I'm losing my patience" The landlord said annoyed.

"Beck, get out now" Jade demanded.

"Are you crazy? I won't let these animals touch you" He responded upset and Jade sighed.

"Get them out" She said to John and he smiled.

"Wise decision" He simply said "But we need insurance that you won't change your mind, so…" John said and called his security guards, who were in the opposite corner.

"What are you doing?" Jade asked nervously.

"Take these guests to the dressing room and keep them there until I say so, stay with them and keep your guns in handy" John ordered to his three guards and they nodded.

"Yes, sir" The men said as they aimed their guns at the gang.

"No, let them go first" Jade demanded.

"Jade, stop talking" Beck ordered but she ignored him.

"You think I'm stupid? You will change your mind as soon as they are safe and we don't want that, do we boys?" John asked the other two men and they shook their heads smiling.

"Of course not, we want you to be relaxed knowing you're doing this for the greater good" The landlord commented and she glared at him furiously "And we want you to enjoy it, this will be the best night of your life"

"Go to hell" Jade said coldly.

"Is that a no?" John asked as he raised his hand and his guards unlocked the guns, so Cat and Tori stepped back scared.

"NO, WAIT!" She screamed and the man smiled "I'll do it…" She added fearfully.

"No, Jade no!" Beck exclaimed and John laughed.

"I wouldn't say that if I were you, boy" John commented "You don't want to die for her, she isn't worth it"

"FUCK YOU!" Beck screamed angrily "Let her go, you son of a bitch"

"You're really on the hook for her, uh? Is she THAT good?" The landlord asked and the three of them laughed while Jade rolled her eyes angrily, but she was terrified.

"I'm fucking to fucking kill you, I swear" Beck threatened.

"I'm tired of your tantrums, kid, we'll give you your pretty toy back after we play with it a little bit, it's no big deal" John commented annoyed and nodded at his guards.

"Bye-bye, prince charming" The landlord said as the guards forced them all to walk to the dressing rooms.

"DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH HER, I WILL KILL YOU" Beck shouted as the man dragged him away at gunpoint.

"He is loud" The third man commented and chuckled as they all gathered around Jade with smiles on their faces, so she stared at them terrified.

"Alone at last" John said once they could no longer hear Beck's screams.

"Please don't do this" Jade said scared, she had no option but to appeal to their empathy, but she knew it wouldn't work.

"Honey, this is long overdue" The landlord commented as he stroked her arm.

"And we promise it's gonna be fun for you too" The third man said and smiled at her, so a few tears started streaming down her face, she knew she had no way out and she was trembling in fear.

"I wasn't expecting you to come, but I guess it's destiny and we can't ignore it" John added and smiled "So baby, you ready for that test?"

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	12. Chapter 12

"You ready for that test?" John asked cynically.

"Please don't hurt me" Jade said scared and stepped back.

"We won't, you'll love it" The landlord said and John chuckled, so she looked down trembling.

"Honey, you have to be convincing…" The third man said "At least smile for us, get us in the mood"

"You're making me look bad" John commented coldly as he grabbed her chin to make her face him "Smile, come on…SMILE!" He ordered as he shook her and held her tighter, so she closed her eyes and did her best to smile at them.

"That's better" The landlord said and John let go of her face so she stroked it because it hurt.

"Get in" John ordered as he held her arm and pushed her into his office, the other two followed them and locked the door while she tried her best to stay calm but lots of tears were streaming down her face.

"Move it, kid, take your clothes off and get ready to dance" The third man demanded but she only looked at John nervously.

"Sure, do them first…They are my guests" John said and they all laughed, the landlord and his friend took a seat on the sofa and she took a breath to give herself the strength she needed, but she couldn't stop trembling.

"I've waited so long for this moment" The landlord said and chuckled while Jade slowly took her pants off, but then John pushed her towards them aggressively.

"Get on his lap and do your thing" He ordered and she looked down to wipe her tears away.

"You don't want me to call my friends backstage, do you?" John asked behind her ear and she shook her head, so he took her shirt off, made her walk to the sofa and forced her to sit on the landlord's lap "Now do it" He ordered and stepped back.

Jade was trembling and trying not to cry, but she kept telling herself she was doing it to protect her friends and her own life. She started moving seductively and tried to pretend it was like any other client, she'd done it before and she could do it again, but she was terrified because she knew how that lap dance would end.

"That's nice, very nice" The man said and put his hands on her hips to rub her against him.

Jade was uncomfortable but then she felt his gun with her knee, it was right next to him and he wasn't holding it because he was busy holding her and the other two were distracted enjoying the show. "Oh yes, yes" The landlord whispered as he touched her all over, he was ready to unbutton his pants and have sex with her so Jade knew that was her chance.

"You like that?" She asked and bit her lip, so he nodded "Ah, ah…" She started moaning to distract him and he got even more turned on.

"I knew you were a dirty slut, I love it" The landlord said and started kissing her chest while she thought about what she wanted to do, she was scared and she wasn't sure but she felt she had no choice.

"I'm ready" She whispered and started kissing him while he rushed to open his pants, Jade discreetly slipped her hand down her leg and grabbed the gun, so she felt a rush of adrenaline running through her veins and she smiled to herself. For the first time in a long time, she finally felt powerful.

"I'm gonna fuck you so hard, you'll cry" He said excitedly but she simply smirked before shooting his brains out from below.

"What the fuck…" The other man said but she simply turned to the side and shot him as well, she didn't give him a chance to do anything.

"DON'T MOVE" Jade screamed as she stood up and saw John standing there shocked. "Not so brave now, uh?" she asked smiling with all the blood on her face.

"Put the gun down" He demanded "My guards will be here in a few seconds, be smart" He said and she laughed.

"No, they won't" She said "This room is soundproof, you told me yourself the first time you tried to rape me and I screamed" She added and he looked to the side upset, he had forgotten about that.

"Listen…" John said nicely.

"On your knees, now!" She ordered and he obeyed, he couldn't doubt her after what he'd just seen.

"You won't get away with this, you know that, right?" He asked and Jade chuckled.

"You won't live to see it, so I say we are even" Jade said.

"You don't wanna kill me" John affirmed "If I die, so do your friends" He added and she thought about it, that was true as well "You didn't consider that, right?"

"Fine, you'll call your guards and tell them to leave, tell them to take my friends outside" Jade demanded.

"You think I'm stupid? You'll just kill me after I do it" He responded.

"Fine, then tell them to set my friends free and come here with you" Jade said "I'm not going to prison, one of them is" She added and he looked at her confused.

"What? Are you serious, doll?" John asked.

"Or I could just kill you and you would never know how this ended" She responded as she aimed the gun at his head.

"No, wait, wait…I'll do it" John said and grabbed his phone so she kept the gun aimed at his head.

"Careful with your words, I have nothing else to lose" Jade said and he sighed.

"Carlos, it's done…the whore did it" John said "Take all the kids out and then the three of you can come in for a taste as well, it's your prize" He added and Jade nodded nervously, she wasn't quite sure what she wanted to do but she wasn't willing to spend her life in prison.

"Done, they'll be here soon" John said and took a breath "You know, you aren't so dumb after all, I like you"

"I'm flattered" Jade said sarcastically and then someone knocked on the door.

"Go ahead" He said and she chuckled.

"Right" She responded and stood behind the door "Open it" she demanded and the man sighed nervously.

"Hey guys, everyone out?" John asked and they nodded.

"Yeah, but the tall guy is trying to get back in" One of them said as the three of them walked into the room but before John or any of them could say anything else, Jade shot the three of them in the back of their heads, so John ended up covered in blood.

"OH MY GOD! YOU FUCKING LUNATIC" John screamed scared and confused, she was holding the gun with trembling hands "I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU" He said as he walked towards her so she closed her eyes and pulled the trigger again, so his body dropped dead right before her eyes.

Jade dropped the gun on the floor and started crying her eyes out completely terrified, she didn't know what to do or how to react, she'd killed them because she was scared but the adrenaline rush was gone and she had to face the consequences of her actions. She'd become a murderer in matter of minutes.

"Hey John, it's almost time to op-" Ana said as she walked into the office and saw the blood bath "AAAH!" She screamed terrified, she looked around and saw two dead men on the sofa and John and his guards dead on the floor, but then she looked to the other side and saw Jade standing there trembling and crying in her underwear.

"Jade? Wha…what are you doing here?" Ana asked confused and scared, but Jade only shook her head.

"I…" Jade said and started crying even more.

"You…did you?" Ana asked nervously as she looked at the corpses.

"They…they tried to rape me and I just…I had to, I didn't have a choice" Jade mumbled nervously and Ana looked at her concernedly.

"Oh god, Jade" Ana said mortified and covered her face so Jade embraced herself as she cried, she knew her life was over.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" She responded "I…I had to, I swear" Jade affirmed and Ana took a deep breath trying to think.

"WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE?" Ana screamed angrily and Jade stepped back.

"I…was looking for you and then they came and they threatened my friends" Jade mumbled between sobs "And they were going to rape me, I'm sorry" she added and covered her face as she cried.

"God, god, god…this isn't happening" Ana whispered to herself.

"I'm sorry, I…" Jade didn't even know what else to say.

"Okay, here's what we are gonna do" Ana said and turned to her, so she stared at her confused.

"What do you mean?" Jade asked. "You won't call the police?"

"You shouldn't have killed them, but you couldn't let them hurt you" Ana said and Jade stared at her surprised.

"What? You agree?" Jade asked confused.

"I know John and this is exactly what he deserved all along, I just…I never thought you'd be the one to do it, this is unfortunate" Ana commented and took a deep breath. "Your friends, where are they?" She randomly asked.

"Outside" She responded.

"Great, so only they know you were here, right?" Ana asked and she nodded "Perfect, I want you to get dressed and go home through the back door, make sure no one sees you, wear something to cover your face" She added.

"What are you gonna do?" Jade questioned disconcertedly.

"Make sure no one ever finds out you were in here" Ana said and sat down on the desk, she simply deleted all the security footage and rebooted the whole system of the club "Done, nothing to see here"

"But…my friends know" Jade said nervously.

"They'll know I got here in time to stop these beasts and I sent you on your way earlier tonight" Ana said and nodded to herself "Yes, that's what it will be"

"Are you sure about this?" Jade asked.

"You are not spending your life in prison, I can assure you that" Ana affirmed and held Jade's face "Do as I say, I'll take care of everything here"

"But…" Jade started.

"GO!" Ana ordered and she ran out of the room.

Jade put her clothes on again and got out through the back of the club, she ran as fast as she could and locked herself in the house. She took a shower and some tea to calm her anxiety, but she was freaking out, she couldn't process everything that had happened that night. Meanwhile, in the club, Ana erased Jade's fingerprints off the gun, put it in the neighbor's hand, locked the office door again and called the cops from outside so the gang saw them arriving.

"What's happened?" One of the cops asked them and they looked at each other, they were about to tell them about Jade but Ana stepped out just in time.

"Thank god you're here!" She said scared. "Please come in, I don't know what happened…my boss, two of his colleagues and three security guards went into the office an hour ago and there is blood under the door and no one is responding" Ana said as she let the cops in.

"Oh my god" Beck said scared but then Ana looked at him and the rest of the gang as she shook her head discreetly.

"Do you have a key?" The cop asked.

"No" She said mortified and they continued trying to open it.

"Jade told me you guys would come but I didn't bring her homework, you'll have to tell the teacher to excuse her or I'll take it to the school myself" Ana commented.

"Where is she?" Cat asked confused.

"Sick at home, she had a fever when I left and…now this, I won't be able to take care of her tonight" Ana said worriedly, and they looked at her confused. "Please go, this isn't a good place for you right now" she said and told them to go with her eyes.

"But…" Andre said but she cut him off.

"Please go" Ana said and nodded at them, so they looked at each other.

"Okay" Beck said and they walked out of the club.

"What was that? Where is Jade?" Tori asked as they walked away from the club.

"I don't know but she clearly wanted us to leave" Beck said referring to Ana.

"Let's go to her house, maybe Ana somehow got her out" Tori said and they agreed. They arrived in Jade's home a few minutes later and saw the lights on so they rang the bell.

"Jade! It's us, are you in there?" Beck asked.

"Please open the door" Tori added and a second later she did, she opened the door and they exhaled relieved. She was fine, she didn't have a single scratch on her but she was completely stoic, she didn't even smile or blink when she saw them.

"Thank god" Beck said and immediately hugged her. "Are you okay? What happened? Did those animals touch you?" He asked concernedly

"I'm fine" Jade simply said and walked to the living room, so they followed her.

"But what happened? How did you get out?" Tori asked.

"I…I got help, Ana came and helped me" Jade informed. "I'm fine, they didn't hurt me" she said emotionlessly but she was clearly disturbed.

"Are you sure?" Beck asked and she nodded.

"I want to sleep, I'll see you tomorrow" She said calmly, and they looked at each other confused, they knew something had happened even if she denied it. "Good night" she said and went to her room without even taking them back out, she simply left them in the living room and locked herself up.

"Ummm…okay, I guess" Beck said confused and they walked out of the house, but they couldn't make sense of what had happened.

"Is it me or is she hiding something?" Tori asked.

"She definitely is" Andre responded.

"We'll talk to her when she is ready, maybe something did happen" Beck said sadly and looked down mortified.

"That might be, the guards laughed when John called them…I don't think that meant she'd escaped" Andre added and Beck closed his eyes in frustration.

"We'll talk to her tomorrow, she needs rest" Beck said emotionlessly and took a breath "We all do"

Next morning Jade woke up not really knowing whether she'd dreamed the incident at the club or not, everything felt surreal but then she saw Ana sitting on the kitchen table

"Good morning, love" Ana said nicely "How did you sleep?"

"What happened?" She asked back and the woman sighed as she looked down, so Jade knew it had been real.

"You have nothing to worry about" She responded. "John was a criminal, he had illegal business and I made sure the police found out about it"

"But what do they think about us?" Jade questioned confused.

"You are not even in the picture and I called them, they found me locked outside so I'm not in the radar either" Ana commented. "And if I am, they have no proofs"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure, your landlord killed them and then killed himself while in a breakdown, that's the story and the angle of his shot wound, as well as the distance match perfectly" Ana affirmed and held Jade's hands. "You're going to be fine, we are going to be fine"

"I…I killed them" Jade said and looked at her ashamedly.

"You did what you had to do, those beasts were going to hurt you" Ana affirmed and grabbed her face to look into her eyes. "You don't have to feel guilty about this, it's over…leave it in the past, now go get ready because it's school day and you can't look suspicious"

Jade showed up to school and her friends immediately approached her in the hallway, she saw them coming and she knew she had to stick to her story, but she didn't even feel like talking to them; everything felt too overwhelming.

"Hey, how are you?" Tori asked concernedly.

"I'm fine" Jade simply said.

"But…last night…they…" Andre mumbled.

"They didn't hurt me" She said. "I'm fine" she repeated.

"Ana called the cops and said you were at home sick" Beck commented. "Where were you? How did you get out?"

"Ana got me out and I just ran home because I was scared" Jade said. "I don't know anything else"

"Why didn't you come to us? We were right outside" Beck commented.

"I…I don't know, I forgot" Jade said nervously and saw their confused faces, she knew she had to give them some details to keep them at ease. "Listen, they didn't hurt me but they were about to…" she said ashamedly.

"What happened?" Beck said as he held her hand and her eyes filled with tears.

"They took me into the office and started touching me…" She said and closed her eyes. "And then John told them they could go first"

"Son of a bitch" Andre said angrily and she nodded as she remembered.

"One of them pushed me down on the sofa and got on top of me and he…he" She said and took a breath. "He put his hand everywhere, he slipped his hand under my panties, I could feel him and he was about to…rape me when the door opened" she lied and looked at their mortified faces.

"Ana?" Tori asked.

"Yeah, she broke in and started yelling at John that the cops were on their way and that she'd put them in jail for rape" Jade said as she looked down. "And she told me to go so I just ran out of the club through the back door, it was closer to home"

"But why did she lie to the cops?" Robbie asked.

"I guess she didn't want them to be suspicious of Jade" Beck commented.

"But so, do you think she might have…?" Tori asked. "I mean, you are like her daughter so we can't blame her" she said and Jade looked to the side.

"Blame her? I would have killed them myself" Beck said coldly. "The important thing is that those bastards are gone"

"Yeah, they are…" Jade said as she stared into space. She knew she'd had reasons to kill them, she knew they deserved it, she knew she was free but that image of the six dead bodies in front of her and all the blood in her hands wouldn't leave her head. It felt like a giant burden that kept growing bigger the more she thought about it.

Several days passed and Jade found herself in a mental downward spiral, which was taking her to a very dark place and she didn't know if she'd be able to get out of it. Nothing made her feel better; not Ana, not Beck, not her friends, not the school, nothing. She felt empty and after each passing day, the drugs her mother had given her became more and more attractive, to the point they seemed the only way out.

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	13. Chapter 13

"I need two volunteers on stage" Sikowitz said and Tori raised her hand. "Good! Who else wants to act?" He asked but no one volunteered.

"Come on guys" Tori said.

"Jade, come on stage" Sikowitz ordered but she was lost in her thoughts.

Jade was just staring into space reliving that horrible night, the night she'd become a murderer, it felt so real, so vivid. She could almost smell the man's breath on her face and feel his hands on her body, she could hear the other two laughing, she could feel the rage in her chest growing and then hear the gunshots as loudly as that night. She could feel the blood on her face and see it on her hands, she could see the man's head blown off right before her eyes, she could feel the trigger on her finger and the shot of adrenaline she felt when she killed them. It was all there, it was all real.

"Jade…" Beck said nicely because she hadn't responded.

"Jade!" Sikowitz said louder and she turned to him.

"What?" She asked.

"I told you to come on stage" He responded.

"I'm not in the mood" Jade said.

"You have to be, you need some participation points for you grades" Sikowitz said and Jade sighed as she joined Tori on stage. They did a little improv and as soon as the class was over, Jade left the classroom without waiting for anyone, she only wanted to be alone, she knew it only made the memories worse but part of her wanted that to happen, part of her wanted things to be so bad that even taking the drugs would be excusable.

"What was that?" Andre asked confused and Beck sighed.

"Something's wrong, I can feel it" He said worriedly "She's been acting strange since that night"

"It was horrible, she has reasons" Robbie commented "I still can't believe it happened"

"Do you guys think she is being honest about it?" Tori asked "I don't know, I get the feeling she is hiding something"

"I asked her, but she refused to say anything and she got upset that I was doubting her, so I just stopped insisting" Beck commented.

"You think they raped her?" Cat asked sadly and Tori thought about it.

"Maybe, I don't know…she is always quiet and lost in her head" She responded "We shouldn't have let them take her" she added sincerely.

"They had guns on us and it was her choice, we couldn't stop her" Robbie said.

"That doesn't make it better, she is like this now because of us, because she tried to save us" Tori commented sadly and they looked at each other, they knew she was right.

"So, what do we do? How do we find out the truth?" Andre asked.

"I don't know, maybe she won't tell us, maybe she doesn't want us to feel bad" Tori said and Beck closed his eyes sadly "She has a tendency to put it all on herself and not accept help, so…"

"This is a fucking nightmare" Beck said angrily "I'm so glad those bastards are dead, I just wish I'd killed them myself"

Later that day Tori walked into the girls bathroom and found Jade simply staring at herself in the mirror, but she seemed a zombie. She wasn't moving or doing anything, she wasn't even looking at the mirror, she was lost and she happened to be standing there.

"Jade?" Tori said confused and Jade turned to her.

"What?" She simply asked emotionlessly.

"Are you okay?" Tori asked worriedly

"Yeah" Jade said and tried to walk away but Tori stopped her.

"No, you're not" She said and Jade rolled her eyes "Talk to me, I know maybe telling Beck what might've happened is hard because he is your boyfriend, but you can tell me and I promise I won't say a word" Tori commented.

"What are you talking about?" Jade asked coldly.

"What really happened to you that night, Jade? Did Ana really get there in time?" Tori asked sadly and Jade stared at her trying to push the tears back, she knew the answer was no, Ana hadn't been there in time, but she couldn't admit out loud that she'd killed six people.

"I told you what happened" She responded.

"Jade, did they rape you? You can tell me, I'm your friend" Tori said nicely as she held her hand, but Jade pulled it back.

"I'm fine" Jade simply said and walked out.

Jade got home and went straight to her room, she simply opened the door to her closet and got inside, there was something about being alone in a dark small space that made her feel safe, it made her feel in control and she imagined it was because of her early childhood locked up in a room while her mother had visitors. Jade simply sat down under all her hanging clothes and leaned her head back, just staring at the darkness and feeling the tears running down her cheeks.

"You can do this, you can do this" Jade whispered to herself as she resisted the urge to reach for the pills in her coat's pocket. She resisted it for a few minutes, which felt like hours for her, but she ended up grabbing the bag of pills and simply held it tightly to her chest.

"Don't, don't" Jade said to herself and broke out crying even more as all the vivid memories came back to her. She could hear them, she could feel them, she could smell them and without realizing it, she had reached into the bag to grab a pill.

Jade stared at her hand in the darkness of the closet and felt the pill moving slightly as she balanced it debating whether she should take it or not. "You can do this, you can do this" She said to herself.

"Yes, you can" Ana suddenly said as she opened the closet door and looked down at Jade, who simply stared at her scared.

"I'm sorry" She said and dropped the pills nervously. "I swear I haven't taken any, you have to believe me" she added and Ana smiled sadly.

"Honey, of course I believe you, come on out" Ana said and hugged her so Jade hugged her back, she really needed someone to protect her from herself and Ana was always that person, she always had her back, even in murder.

"You really believe me?" Jade asked surprised.

"Yeah, but we need to take care of these, you can't have them" Ana said and grabbed all the pills. "Are there any more?"

"No" Jade responded.

"Are you completely sure?" Ana asked again and Jade nodded, so she smiled. "Very well, then we can move past this, it's over" she said warmly and stroked Jade's cheek before going to the bathroom and flushing the pills away.

"Thanks…" Jade said and Ana turned to her confused.

"For what?"

"For being here for me" Jade responded and looked down. "I don't know where I'd be without you and I don't want to let you down" she added sincerely.

"Don't think about that, you know I love you and you won't let me down" Ana affirmed. "Now, I know this is overwhelming for you and it's okay, but you can always talk to me about it"

"I know, I guess I just freaked out a little…it's hard to keep it together sometimes" Jade responded and sighed. "But I'll get through this"

"Yes, you will, we will" Ana said and smiled. "Now let's go get lunch, how about pizza?" she asked and Jade nodded with a little smile, Ana was the mother she'd always needed and she finally had her.

"Sounds great…"

Jade really wanted things to get better and she was trying her hardest to stay sober, but she still felt her relationship with her biological mother was holding her back. She needed to fix it or, at least, stay in touch with her occasionally.

"Hi mom" Jade said as she stepped into her mother's apartment and saw her in the living room drinking a glass of vodka.

"Look who's back" Lorraine said and stood up. "I thought I wouldn't see you again"

"I wanted to make sure you were okay" Jade said.

"I am" She responded and Jade sat down next to her. "Is that all?"

"No" Jade admitted. "You were gone long enough, I want us to fix things" she said and Lorraine wasn't as drunk as other days, so she actually understood her daughter's point.

"You have a new mom now, Ana stole you from me" Lorraine affirmed coldly.

"That's not true, you are my mom even after everything" Jade said and Lorraine stared at her emotionlessly. "We can fix things"

"Would you move back in here with me?" Lorraine asked.

"I can't do that, but I can visit you every day if you want" Jade suggested and smiled because she could see Lorraine was considering it.

"What if Ana gets upset about it?" Lorraine asked.

"I won't tell her, it'll be our secret" Jade responded. "Does that mean you say yes? Do you want to see me?"

"You're my daughter, Jade, I do love you even if I sometimes deny it" Lorraine admitted, and Jade smiled with tears in her eyes.

"I love you too, mom" Jade said and hugged her so Lorraine hugged her back, Jade couldn't believe it was actually happening, but it was a moment she'd been dreaming of for years. "It's all set, I'll come to see you every day after school"

Jade started visiting her mother every day after school and things were getting better between them, it felt like a whole new relationship had formed and she was loving it. Lorraine seemed to be getting better, she wasn't drunk or high when Jade visited her and she expressed her love for her all the time.

Two months went by and Jade really felt she was getting ready to tell Ana and her friends about her visits to Lorraine, she'd been keeping them a secret and lying to both sides to explain the time she spent with her.

"So, what should we eat?" Jade asked as they sat down on the sofa.

"How about pizza?" Lorraine suggested.

"Sounds great" Jade said and stood up to go get her phone from her bag but then she got a glimpse of some drugs behind the portraits. "Mom, what are these?" She asked as she grabbed them.

"I…bought them the other day, just in case I needed it" Lorraine explained.

"But we talked about it, you promised you'd leave them too" Jade responded.

"It's hard, Jade, life is hard and you're not always here to make it better" Lorraine said with a few tears in her eyes.

"I know, mom but that will change soon" Jade said and smiled. "I'll tell everyone about us"

"Are you sure? What if Ana gets mad at you?" Lorraine asked worriedly.

"She won't and even if she does, you are my mom, you always will be" Jade affirmed and hugged her. "But I'm gonna take these, please don't buy more"

"I'll try" She responded.

"Promise me" Jade demanded.

"I promise"

Later that day Jade went home because she was going to meet her friends there for a project they had. Ana was home, so she was just reading in the dining room while they planned their play in the living room.

"Alright, so we have two main characters so far, we still need to do the characterization of the son" Tori commented as she read her notes.

"Yeah, but we can't get to that yet, we need to figure out the next step in the plot" Jade responded.

"You had that, didn't you?" Andre asked.

"Just some ideas I wrote down on my notebook" Jade said.

"Well, let us hear them" Tori said.

"Beck, can you pass me my notebook? It's in the bag" Jade said and he nodded, he reached to the side to get her backpack and looked inside but when he grabbed the notebook, he uncovered the bag of pills underneath. He had not seen that coming so he just stared at them for a few seconds debating what to do or say, he'd thought she was over that.

"Beck, the notebook" Andre said and he looked back at his friends.

"What's the matter?" Jade asked confused because she could see his face.

"What are these?" Beck asked as he pulled the bag of pills out and her eyes wide opened, she'd completely forgotten about those.

"It's not what you think" Jade said.

"What's not what he thinks?" Ana asked as she walked into the room with a tray of snacks and then saw the pills Beck was holding. "Oh god…" she said and shook her head disappointedly,

"I swear it's not what you all think" Jade insisted.

"Do explain, Jade, we talked about this" Ana said coldly "You made a promise"

"And I've kept it" Jade responded annoyed that they were all doubting her "Those aren't mine"

"They are in your backpack!" Tori exclaimed.

"Have you taken any?" Andre asked.

"No, I'm clean! I have been for months" Jade affirmed

"Then what are you doing with those?" Ana asked upset "Explain!"

"You know, I don't like your tone and the way you're looking at me" She responded coldly "I'm telling the truth, but it seems my word is not good enough for you" She added clearly upset as well and Ana took a breath to calm down.

"Jade, I'm not mad, okay? I just need you tell me the truth" Ana said calmly "We'll fix it, just be honest with us"

"I'm being honest" Jade responded "I wanted to throw them away" she explained.

"Throw them away?" Tori asked confused.

"Yes" She said sharply.

"What do you mean? Why did you buy them in the first place?" Beck questioned.

"I didn't buy them" Jade said and took a breath. "They are not mine, they are my mother's, I just took them to help her, I meant to get rid of them but I forgot they were in my backpack" She explained and they looked at her confused.

"What?" Tori asked

"I've been seeing my mom for months, every day after school" Jade said and saw them looking at each other disconcertedly. "Listen, I meant to tell you, but I knew you wouldn't agree and she is my mom after all, I wanted to fix things with her" she added.

"Jade, what are you talking about?" Ana asked seriously.

"I started visiting my mom a few months ago and she's changed, she is trying to get clean too" Jade affirmed.

"Wait, wait…" Ana said trying to process it "I don't understand, what are you saying?" She asked again and Jade looked back at her confused.

"I know it sounds crazy but she really has changed, she did it for me" Jade informed and smiled so they looked at her confused "I went to see her a few months ago and at first she was upset and she gave me the pills, the ones you found me with, remember?" She asked Ana and she nodded slowly as she stared at her appalled. "But then I decided to go back and she was different, we talked and she is trying to be better for me so I'm helping her" she added gladly

"Jade…" Tori said confused and sad.

"I know you all think she is a bad influence and I get it" Jade added. "But she is so much better now, she is really trying"

"Jade, what are you talking about? What you say is impossible" Ana affirmed still trying to process it and took a breath "Honey, you don't have to lie, just admit you bought them"

"Why would I lie about this? It's true" Jade responded angrily and they all looked at each other not knowing what to say "I can't tell if you think I'm lying because you don't trust me or because you think my mom isn't strong enough to beat the addiction" she commented coldly and they looked at each other.

"What you are saying is impossible, stop lying now" Ana demanded "I'm serious, Jade, we are done with your little game, TELL ME THE TRUTH!" she exclaimed louder.

"I'm not lying!" Jade insisted upset "I can't believe you're doing this, I know you don't like her and that you don't think she can change but I do and she's proven it to me, so I hope you understand" She said coldly.

"You're lying, just admit it" Ana almost begged.

"She is still my mother and we are building a better relationship" Jade informed coldly "I don't care what you say, I'll keep seeing her and if you want to kick me out, then go ahead" she added upset.

"No, I would never kick you out" Ana said and took a breath to calm down.

"You certainly don't trust me, you can't have someone you don't trust in your house" Jade said coldly.

"Honey, I will never leave you" Ana affirmed "This is not about that"

"Then what is it about?" Jade asked angrily and Ana looked down as she thought about her next words.

"Jade, love…" She said trying to find the right way to say it.

"If you are going to say something about my mom, save it" Jade responded annoyed.

"What you are saying doesn't make any sense, Jade, what do you expect us to say?" Tori asked

"What? What's the matter with all of you?" Jade asked them confused "It's not that big of a deal, she is my mom and I wanted to go see her so I did"

"You couldn't have seen your mother, it's not possible" Beck affirmed.

"Why do you say that? I have seen her, I saw her today" Jade responded and Ana shook her head.

"No, you didn't" Ana informed "Jade, Lorraine is dead and she has been for months"

* * *

**I bet you didn't see that coming ;)**

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	14. Chapter 14

"Jade, Lorraine is dead, she has been for months" Ana informed and Jade laughed a little as she stared at her confused.

"What are you talking about?" Jade asked.

"Honey, your mother died months ago" Ana repeated but Jade shook her head as she chuckled.

"I saw her a few hours ago, someone lied to you" She affirmed but then saw their serious faces. "This is ridiculous, she is not dead, who told you that?"

"Listen love, we didn't tell you because we didn't want to upset you during your recovery" Ana commented. "She overdosed while you were in the clinic, I saw her myself…she is dead" She informed and Jade shook her head confused.

"No, no, this is a mistake" Jade affirmed. "She can't be dead, I've seen her every day for months" She added.

"Jade, I saw her with my own eyes" Ana informed and Jade shook her head.

"You are lying and you are wrong, she is alive" She insisted and the gang looked down mortified, they couldn't believe that was happening, they wanted to believe she was lying to cover up her addiction because that was better than accepting the fact she was hallucinating "Stop looking at me like that, I know what I'm saying" Jade said to them annoyed.

"Love, I think we need to calm down and go see your doctor" Ana said as she grabbed her hand, but Jade pulled it back.

"No, I don't need a doctor" She informed.

"I think you do, honey…unless you want to admit you are lying" Ana said so Jade shook her head upset.

"I'm not lying" Jade affirmed.

"Your mother is dead, so you couldn't have seen her" Beck affirmed.

"Do you think I'm stupid enough to believe that lie?" She asked upset "I understand that you want to keep me away from her, but this is low"

"We are telling the truth" Tori said.

"But you're not, just admit it" Ana begged.

"I am telling the truth and I'll prove it" Jade affirmed so they looked at each other debating what to believe "Follow me"

Jade made them all walk to her former building and they went up the stairs to her apartment, it wasn't locked so she simply opened the door and they all walked inside. The place was a little dusty, but not as much as they'd expected, and there was some food on the table, which didn't make sense.

"Mom, where are you?" Jade asked, she needed to hear Lorraine's voice because she needed to confirm she wasn't going crazy.

"Over here, honey" Lorraine said and Jade smiled as she walked towards the living room and saw her standing there. She simply smiled at her and took a breath in relief.

"See? She is right here" Jade said as she pointed to the living room, but her friends and Ana simply stared at her mortified, Ana even had some tears in her eyes. "What? What's the problem? She is right here!" Jade exclaimed proudly and smiled but then she got confused because they were just looking at her scared and worriedly.

"What's the matter, Jade?" Lorraine asked and Jade turned to her.

"I don't know" She said to her mother and Ana took a breath to remain calm; Jade was talking to the air, there was no one in that room. "Why are you crying?" Jade asked Ana confused. "It's not that big of a deal…" she added and rolled her eyes.

"God, this can't be happening" Beck said as he covered his face and Jade stared at him disconcertedly as Ana held her hands.

"Jade, there is no one here" Ana informed and Jade stared at her confused.

"What do you mean? She is right there" She insisted. "Come on mom, say something, say you are real"

"I am real, Jade, they see me but they are trying to confuse you" Lorraine affirmed.

"Why would they do that? They are my friends" Jade said to her mother and the gang covered their mouths in shock and fear, she was indeed still hallucinating.

"Who do you believe more? Me or them? Better yet, you or them? I'm here, I've been here every day for you" Lorraine said and Jade nodded as she smiled at the empty room.

"Yeah, you have" She said.

"Honey, let's go see your doctor, I promise this will go away" Ana said nicely.

"Of course, they'll lock you up again to keep you away from me" Lorraine said coldly and Jade looked at her "Go on, I know you want to go with her, you love her more than me" she added sadly.

"No, don't say that" Jade said to her and her friends looked at each other mortified, they didn't know how to react to that situation.

"It's true and you know it" Lorraine said.

"Love, we'll see your doctor now, come on…" Ana said as she tried to pull her to the door, but Jade resisted it.

"Of course you will, and he'll put you in a straitjacket and fill you with pills to keep you under control" Lorraine said and shook her head at Ana "She doesn't care, honey, she just wants you away from me at any cost"

"You are right" Jade said and moved away from everyone "Get out" she said to Ana and her friends.

"No, we are going home" Ana informed.

"I'm home, I'm with my mom and you know it, you just want to confuse me" Jade affirmed upset.

"Jade, there is no one else here, she is dead" Beck informed.

"You too?" She asked disappointedly. "I'm looking at her" Jade said and Lorraine smiled.

"You are hallucinating" Tori said.

"I'm not crazy" She responded.

"No, you are not" Ana said. "You are just a little confused right now, but doctor Williams is going to help"

"I don't need help, I'm fine" Jade responded. "You all need to admit you're lying"

"They just want you to forget about me, will you let them?" Lorraine asked.

"No, mom don't worry I won't" Jade said and they shook their heads sadly.

"Fine, Lorraine…You win" Ana said to the same spot Jade was talking to "You are not good for her, I wanted to keep you away"

"What are you doing?" Tori whispered confused.

"It's fine guys, you don't have to lie anymore, it was a bad idea" Ana said and took a breath. "Jade, I'm sorry…I didn't want to lose you to her and I was trying to protect you"

"But why did you tell me she was dead?" Jade asked confused "That's so fucked up"

"I didn't want you to keep seeing her, I thought I'd scare you if I said that and I was wrong, I'm sorry" Ana commented and Jade sighed as she looked down relieved to hear it.

"I can't believe you would do this to me" She said.

"I know and I'm sorry, to both of you" Ana said. "Can we put this behind us? Lorraine, you can move in with us, that way you'll be closer to Jade"

"What? Really?" Jade asked surprised.

"Of course, if that makes you happy" Ana said and the gang could see what she was doing so they smiled at where Lorraine was supposed to be.

"Would you do it?" Jade asked her mother and she smiled at her.

"I just want to be with you, baby, so if she allows me…of course I will" Lorraine said and Jade smiled at her and then at Ana.

"Thank you"

"No problem, go ahead" Ana said and let Jade walk by, she waited a few more seconds for 'Lorraine' to follow her and then she sighed as she nodded at the gang. They all made their way back to Ana's house and she locked the door.

"It's been so long since I was here" Lorraine said. "It's a nice house"

"Yes, it is" Jade said to the spot next to her on the sofa, so her friends knew where to look when they pretended to talk to Lorraine.

"Jade, stay with Lorraine while we get us some snacks" Ana said and Jade nodded, her friends left the room and followed Ana to the kitchen where they'd be able to talk.

"She lost her mind" Andre said nervously and Ana took a breath.

"I don't know if her family has a history of mental illness" Ana admitted "But we should check, maybe Lorraine had it too…she was a few years older than Jade when she started losing control, maybe it has to do with it"

"This can't be happening" Beck said mortified.

"What do we do?" Tori asked scared.

"She really thinks her mother is there, this is serious" Beck added worriedly. "We need to get her to a doctor now"

"Yes, but how? She won't go" Robbie responded. "And we can only pretend to see her dead mother for so long, what if she talks to us in her head? We won't know"

"Let's just try to avoid talking directly to Lorraine, let's focus on Jade" Ana said. "We can do this, it's only while the doctor gets here"

They went back to the living room and saw Jade simply typing on her phone, but she looked up when she sensed them. "We brought some nuts" Cat said and put them on the table.

"Do you want anything else?" Jade asked Lorraine.

"Water maybe" Lorraine said and Jade nodded as she looked to her friends but they didn't do anything.

"Well, aren't you going to bring it?" Jade asked confused and they looked at her nervously.

"What was it she wanted? I'm sorry, I got distracted" Ana said.

"Water" Jade responded annoyed.

"Does she want anything else?" She asked.

"Ask her" Jade said coldly and Ana smiled.

"Lorraine, is there anything else I can do for you?" Ana asked.

"Actually, I think I would like to talk to you in private" Lorraine said and Jade nodded.

"I think that's a great idea" Jade said and the gang looked at Ana worriedly, they had no idea how she could respond to that and the ambulance they'd requested was taking long.

"Really?" Ana asked.

"Why would she joke about that? And why are you acting so weird?" Jade asked.

"I just don't understand exactly what she wants, could you explain?" Ana asked.

"Oh my god, I never thought you'd act like this" She responded upset. "Be an adult and ask her directly, she is right here and you invited her"

"Oh my god, I can't do this anymore" Ana said and took a breath. "Jade, I can't ask her because there is NO ONE there, it's just you"

"What?" Jade asked confused. "Are you really gonna play this game again? Here?"

"This is not a game, Jade, you are hallucinating" Beck informed.

"No, I'm not, she is real" Jade affirmed and then she heard the sirens outside, so she looked at the window briefly and then back at them, she simply smiled angrily and shook her head. "How can you be doing this to me?" She asked truly hurt.

"This is for your own good, you are not well" Ana responded and a couple of tears streamed down her face.

"She is willing to lock you up to maintain her lie, Jade, she is evil, they all are" Lorraine said and Jade took a small breath. "You know what to do now" she said and Jade looked down at her backpack on the floor.

"I don't know if that's a good idea" Jade whispered.

"What did you say?" Tori asked and Jade looked at her coldly as she thought about it.

"It is, just do it" Lorraine said but she shook her head.

"No, I can fix this…just give me a minute" Jade said as she held her head nervously, but they all knew she was talking to her mother.

"What? What is it?" Beck asked concernedly and she turned to him "Come on, just talk to me"

"I…" Jade started.

"DON'T!" Lorraine said on her ear and Jade stared at her scared.

"Hey, it's fine, you don't have to be afraid, I'm here for you" Beck said nicely and smiled as he walked towards her.

"Don't trust him" Lorraine insisted.

"Stop talking, I'm trying to think" Jade said upset and took small breaths to stay calm.

"You don't deserve to be locked up, I gave you that present for a reason, you need protection from everyone, those men at the club…and now you need to protect yourself from them" Lorraine said in her ear.

"No, there must be another way" Jade said nervously and shook her head while everyone stared at her mortified and Ana tried not to cry, but it was really hard, she had several tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Trust me, honey, I just want you to be free" Lorraine said sweetly "You don't need them, you have me and we are going to be together forever"

"But…" Jade said and then stopped herself.

"If you stay, they'll lock you up for the rest of your life, is that what you want?" Lorraine asked.

"No" She whispered and they looked at each other, they couldn't understand what she was talking about.

"It's gonna be just fine, Jade, don't worry" Ana affirmed and smiled.

"Make a decision now, be wise" Lorraine said on her ear and Jade nodded as she turned back to Ana.

"Okay, so…what now? I'm going to a hospital?" Jade asked calmly but they could sense something was wrong, she was way too collected.

"Nothing bad, love, you'll get better" Ana said and Jade nodded as she looked down.

"Can I at least take my backpack?" She asked and Ana nodded.

"Good, very good girl" Lorraine said satisfied

"Of course" Ana responded and Jade leaned down to take her backpack, but she grabbed a pistol from it instead and she immediately aimed it at them.

"Oh my god" Tori exclaimed terrified as they all stepped back.

"What are you doing? Where did you get that?" Ana asked shocked.

"A present from my mom" She responded.

"Jade, put the gun down" Beck said nervously.

"You are not going to lock me up" Jade said.

"Honey, put the gun down please, we can talk about this" Ana said sweetly trying to hide her fear.

"No, don't trust her" Lorraine said and Jade shook her head.

"It's okay, my love, just give me the gun" Ana insisted as she stepped towards her slowly.

"Shoot her! It's the only way" Lorraine said.

"I can't" Jade responded but they couldn't tell if she was talking to Ana or Lorraine.

"Yes, you can…just put it down and give it to me" Ana demanded.

"Pull the trigger" Lorraine said again "It's the only way to stay safe" she insisted.

"Stop saying that" Jade said scared as she covered one of her ears mortified but she kept aiming the gun at them, she was just shaking her head a little and they didn't know what to do. She was crazy.

"Jade, please stop" Beck begged "Put the gun down, we'll fix this"

"He is a traitor too, kill him" Lorraine ordered.

"Shut up, I'm trying to think" Jade said again as her eyes filled with tears.

"Oh god…" Tori whispered terrified and sadly.

"The ambulance is here, they're gonna take you" Lorraine said and Jade shook her head angrily.

"No, they won't" She affirmed.

"Honey…" Ana said sweetly.

"Don't even try" Jade responded coldly "My mom and I are going to go through the backdoor and you'll stay here with your friends from the hospital"

"What are you talking about? You can't leave, you need help" Ana said worriedly. "Jade, I love you, we all do"

"You love me? That's why you want to make me believe I am crazy?" Jade asked. "Go to hell, all of you" she said full of rage.

"Honey, please" Ana said and stepped closer.

"Another step and you're dead" Jade threatened still holding the gun against them and slowly leaned down to grab her backpack and her jacket.

"You're not a killer, you're just scared" Ana said nicely.

"No? Did you forget the club?" Jade asked and her friends looked at each other.

"What?" Beck asked confused and Jade laughed.

"Oh right, you don't know" She commented and took a breath "It was me, I killed them…with a gun like this, so surprise!" She exclaimed sarcastically and their eyes wide opened.

"Oh my god" Andre said shocked and Jade nodded as she looked back at Ana.

"You know what I'm capable of, so don't test me" She said coldly "I'm gonna go with my mom, I should've never left her"

"Don't do this" Beck said and then the bell rang.

"We can help you" Andre insisted.

"Shut up" Jade responded.

"Honey, please come with us" Ana said with tears in her eyes and Jade shook her head.

"Cat, get the door and say it was a mistake, if you even blink in the wrong way I'll kill everyone, understood?" Jade warned and Cat nodded scared. She slowly opened the door and smiled while Jade kept looking at everyone coldly.

"Miss, we are here from the mental ward to see the patient" The man said.

"What patient?" Cat asked.

"You called and said there was an emergency" The other man added.

"Cat, I'm sorry…that was me, we were playing truth or dare before you arrived" Tori said as she joined her at the door.

"You are saying this was a joke?" The man asked annoyed.

"Yes, I'm so sorry, we had to play" Tori said. "You can go now" she said and they rolled their eyes as they walked away so she simply closed the door and Jade chuckled.

"Well done, you just saved six lives…for now" Jade said and waited until they heard the ambulance leaving.

"You don't want to kill us" Beck affirmed

"No, but I will if I have to" Jade responded "I didn't want to kill those six men either and I did it anyway, I think about it every day" she added as a few tears streamed down her cheeks.

"You did it in self-defense, it's different" Ana affirmed.

"Then why did you lie to cover it up? I'm a killer and you know it" Jade said mortified "But I won't spend the rest of my life locked up, neither in prison nor in a hospital" she added.

"We can help you" Ana said and smiled "Honey, you're not alone"

"No, I'm not" Jade responded coldly but they knew she was referring to her mother "I didn't want tonight to end like this but that's life, right Ana? It's full of liars" she added disappointedly.

"Please put the gun down" Beck demanded "It's okay, we don't want to hurt you"

"No, you just want to lock me up" She responded upset and took a breath "We are leaving right now and we are never coming back"

* * *

**I know, she is crazy and just so you know, I'm basing this entirely on shows I've seen, I'm no doctor. **

**Anyway, I hope you enjoyed!**

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	15. Chapter 15

"Stay there, if I sense any movement, I'm going to shoot you and I don't care if you die" Jade threatened and started walking to the back door carefully. They didn't know what to do, they wanted to help her, but they couldn't risk their lives, she was clearly unstable, and they knew she'd pull the trigger if she felt overwhelmed.

Jade left the house and they all looked took a breath in relaxation and concern at the same time they felt safe, but they also wanted her to be safe and she currently wasn't, in fact she'd never been in more danger before. They didn't have to protect her from people or external danger, they had to protect her from herself.

"We can't just let her walk away" Beck said.

"She has a gun and she is unstable" Andre said. "I think we need to call the police"

"I agree" Tori said. "We can't help her, she needs more care than we can give her"

"Oh god, I can't believe this is happening" Ana said and sat down holding her head, she felt so overwhelmed.

"How did we not see this?" Beck asked. "She's been delusional for months and we never even suspected it"

"She didn't give us reasons" Andre said "How could we have known she talked to her dead mother when she kept it a secret?"

"Still, this is something big" Beck commented "I should've paid more attention to her"

"This no one's fault" Ana affirmed and took a breath "Someone please call the police and tell them everything" she added and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Cat asked.

"I'll make some coffee, this will be a long night" She said emotionlessly and walked into the kitchen.

The police started looking for Jade but she was nowhere to be found, they searched her late mother's apartment, her father's house and the places she usually went to but they hadn't even seen her in the area. Hours turned into days and two weeks later, the search had almost ceased.

"She was on foot and she didn't have any money, how can you not find her? It's been two weeks!" Ana exclaimed upset as the two police officers looked at her.

"I'm sorry, ma'am but no one has seen her" One of them said.

"Her photo is everywhere and she is not exactly subtle, someone must've heard her talking to the fucking air" Beck said angrily. "Have you checked mental wards or hospitals?"

"No need to raise your voice and yes, we have but there's no record of her" The other officer said.

"I do need to raise my voice because my girlfriend is hallucinating, she has a gun and she's been missing for two weeks and all you can say is that you're sorry" Beck responded.

"We are doing everything we can, as soon as we have news, we'll let you know" The man said and they walked out, Tori simply closed the door and Beck took a breath as he sat down on the sofa across from Ana.

"Where the hell is she? How could she disappear like this?" Beck asked.

"She might be unstable, but she is not stupid and is aware of what she is doing, she probably took measures to go undetected" Tori said.

"But she isn't okay" Cat added worriedly.

"Are we sure she didn't have any money?" Andre asked "I can't think of another explanation, she couldn't have walked too far and when the cops started looking for her, she was already gone"

"I didn't give her a lot and she bought the drugs and the gun so, unless she stole it from someone else, I'm sure she didn't have money" Ana said. "Which makes it even worse, because where has she been? What has she eaten?"

"Let's not be negative, she's smart, she'll be okay" Robbie said but Beck shook his head.

"No, she won't" He responded "She is mentally unstable"

"Yes, but Robbie is right…let's not think the worst" Tori commented "She is hallucinating her mother, but apart from that she is fully functional, that's why we didn't realize she had a problem" She added.

"Exactly, I'm sure she found a way to get by" Andre added and Beck sighed but he couldn't stop worrying, he needed to find her and make sure she got the help she needed. It was still surreal to think about the fact she was hallucinating her dead mother, it felt like a bad joke.

Jade opened the door to the road hotel she was staying in and took off the oversized coat and hat she was wearing, which she'd stolen from some girls at a public restroom to keep herself warm. "Mom?" She said and Lorraine stepped out of the bathroom.

"Hi honey" She said and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"No one came, right?" Jade asked and her mother shook her head.

"No, we are still safe" Lorraine said and Jade laid down on the bed. "Coming to New York was a wise choice, love"

"I'm not so sure anymore" Jade admitted.

"What are you talking about?" Lorraine asked confused.

"I…I don't want to keep doing this" Jade admitted with tears in her eyes and took a breath as she resisted the urge to cry more. She was so emotionally drained.

"Honey, there is no option, if we go back Ana and your friends will lock you up in a mental hospital" Lorraine said.

"But this…this is horrible" Jade said.

"It's temporary, only while we find you a better job that they can't track down" Lorraine said as she stroked Jade's hair.

"But how long? I can't do it anymore, mom" Jade said as she opened her eyes to look at her and Lorraine wiped her tears away.

"Baby, it's okay, it's just dancing…you've done it before" Lorraine said and stroked her cheek "Besides, you've done a lot more already to get us here and I'm proud of you for that" She commented and Jade closed her eyes as more tears streamed down her cheeks, she didn't like to think about that.

"You know I didn't want to do it" Jade said.

"But you did, honey, and if you could do that, you can certainly handle this" Lorraine affirmed and Jade took a breath trying to be objective, her mother had a point and she wanted to believe it, but the truth was she couldn't stand her life as it was and the memories of her trip to New York consumed her every day.

"I need something to sleep" Jade said and Lorraine handed her the bag of drugs, so she reached inside to grab a pill and swallowed it without even drinking water.

"Good girl, you'll feel better now" Lorraine said as she stroked her head and Jade closed her eyes waiting for the drugs to kick in, she needed to numb out all her feelings to be able to handle them.

The truth was Jade had slept her way to New York because it was the only way she'd managed to get rides or easy money and every time she closed her eyes, she could feel those men on top of her all over again. However, their faces were always blurry, she felt them inside her but when she tried to picture what they looked like, she could only see John and her landlord and the men from the club. There were moments when she wasn't even sure what had really happened those nights, she didn't know if she had actually slept with John at the club and she'd killed the men who gave her rides, or if it was the other way around.

After everything she'd been through, nothing made sense to her and she had no clarity on the facts or even the chronological order of events in her life. Jade only knew she'd slept with a few men and killed some others, she was a prostitute and a killer, those were the facts and everything else didn't matter.

"Hey, how is the night?" Dexter, her boss at the club, asked as he approached her the next day.

"It's okay, crowded" She simply said as she leaned back on the bar and stared at all the men cheering for the girl on the stage.

"So, are you ready to tell me more about you?" He asked and she looked at him emotionlessly.

"What do you wanna know?" Jade asked as she took his cigarette and smoked.

"Where do you come from? It's clear you know the business, but you strike me as a rather posh girl in a slutty Halloween costume" Dexter commented and she chuckled.

"A very long Halloween, I've been in this for a while" Jade said and smoked again. "I'm no posh girl, my father disowned me as soon as I turned eighteen" She informed.

"There it is! It's always daddy issues, cheers to all the bad fathers in the world!" He said and drank from his glass, so she rolled her eyes. "So, you live alone now?"

"I live with my mom" Jade said and he looked at her confused.

"Does she know you do this?" He asked.

"Yeah" She responded.

"Alright…so, bad daddy and surprisingly permissive mommy, no boyfriend? Friends?" Dexter asked.

"It's just my mom and me" She informed and drank a glass of whisky.

"I'd like to meet her" He commented "She sounds interesting"

"Sure, one day" Jade said and stood up "Anyway, it's almost time for my show"

"See you later, Allie" He said and she nodded, that was the name she'd given him because she trusted no one and she couldn't risk being even linked to Jade West. That life was in the past, she knew that going back would mean getting locked up and telling everyone what she'd been doing, so she preferred to just stay away.

"Still no news?" Mr. West asked as he stepped into Ana´s living room after inviting himself into the house, he'd been in contact with Ana over the phone but that was the first time he showed up.

"What are you even doing here?" Beck asked upset.

"My daughter is missing" He responded.

"Jade stopped being your daughter long ago" Tori affirmed. "Just leave"

"I didn't come here to talk to rude kids, I'm here to see Ana" Mr. West said and looked at her, but she was just staring at him coldly.

"I agree with the rude kids, you ditched Jade like an animal when she turned eighteen and this is the result" Ana said as she stood up. "I hope you are happy"

"This is not my fault, she is an adult and this is all on her…and in any case, the blame can be put on Lorraine, she turned our daughter into an insane junkie like herself" He affirmed. "But still, it's Jade's responsibility, of course she was going to follow in her mother's footsteps" He said and they shook their heads at him, they couldn't believe that man could say that about his own daughter.

"Excuse me? Are you saying this is her fault?" Tori asked upset.

"She's always been a disappointment" He responded.

"Do you have any idea of what Jade has been through?" Andre asked coldly and Mr. West looked to the side annoyed.

"Let me give you a refresher" Beck said. "Jade had to start working as a stripper to survive and go to school, she had to deal with her landlord's harassment, she became addicted to alcohol and drugs, she had to go through a very painful rehab and now she is hallucinating her dead mother, she's been out there by herself with nothing but a gun and a bag of drugs, ALL because YOU kicked her out as soon as the law allowed you to" He said angrily and looked at him from top to bottom. "How dare you come here and ask about her?"

"She is my daughter and I have a right to know where she is" He insisted.

"We don't know, we might never know" Ana responded. "But hey, you might get lucky and find out she overdosed or shot herself in some dark alley"

"How can you even say that?" Mr. West asked upset.

"Because it's true, the police haven't found her" Beck said coldly.

"That's because they are not trying hard enough but I will" He responded.

"What are you trying to prove? We all know you don't care about her" Andre commented.

"That doesn't mean I want her to end up like this, I'll find her and send her to a clinic where she'll get the care she needs and then, we can all move on" He explained.

"So, your plan is to keep her in a mental ward for the rest of her life, what a good father!" Beck said.

"You might not agree but she is my daughter and you cannot stop me" He responded. "As for now, you only have to wait until my people find her"

Jade arrived from work as she did every day and walked up the stairs through the parade of junkies and hookers. The hotel she lived in was even worse than the apartment she used to share with her mother but at that point, that wasn't even one of her biggest concern. The dreadful appearance of that place perfectly reflected what her life had become once again.

"Mom?" Jade asked when she opened the door and didn't see her mother on the bed as always, it was almost sunrise so that was strange. "Mom, where are you?" She asked again and looked inside the bathroom, which was also empty.

"Mom!" Jade exclaimed louder, she felt fear running through her body and she couldn't explain it because it had only been a moment, so feeling so scared was not normal. She knew there was an explanation for Lorraine's absence but deep inside, what she feared was that Ana's words became true. That was a fear she always had and it was only calmed by her mother's voice or touch.

"Mom!" Jade exclaimed again with a few tears in her eyes as she looked around the room anxiously.

"I'm here, honey" Lorraine suddenly said from behind her and Jade turned around to see her on the bed. Jade didn't know where she had come from, but she didn't want to think about it, seeing her was the only reaffirmation she needed that she wasn't crazy.

"Where were you?" Jade asked.

"Right here, honey, I don't know why you didn't see me" Lorraine said, and Jade took a breath in relaxation. "Come on, it's time for bed…You must be exhausted"

Jade laid down on the edge of the small bed and felt her mother's hand on her hair, she could hear her singing, she could feel her warmth and everything felt right, she felt in peace and that's all she needed, she didn't want to think about anything else because even the possibility of Lorraine being a fragment of her imagination was terrifying. _She wasn't crazy, she couldn't be and she'd made the right choice when she left Los Angeles._

"Here, have something to sleep better" Lorraine said as she showed her a syringe and Jade sighed feeling the injection, which was immediately followed by a sense of peace and numbness.

"Sleep tight, honey" Lorraine said and Jade started feeling the need to close her eyes, she blinked feeling her eyelids getting heavier and saw her mother vanishing and then reappearing right before her eyes after each blink, she didn't understand why that happened but she wasn't trying to make sense of it. She was drugged and she had no intentions to even entertain the possibility of Lorraine being actually dead, so she simply kept her eyes closed and finally fell asleep, in that room all by herself.

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	16. Chapter 16

"I have news" Mr. West said as Ana and the gang stood in his living room after he'd called them.

"What is it?" Ana asked anxiously.

"My people found her in some security footage of the road the night she left, they just sent it to me, and they are following her trace" He informed as he turned on the TV.

The footage was in black and white, but they could Jade signaling at the road for a ride as she looked around nervously and occasionally talked to her side, then they saw a truck stopping and a man getting out to approach her more closely. They couldn't hear their conversation, but they could see Jade rolling her eyes at the man.

"What's he saying?" Cat asked because they couldn't read his lips

"I don't know" Beck said and they saw Jade speaking to the air as the man stared at her confused, he clearly had not expected that, so he just watched her and his confusion slowly turned into curiosity.

The guy simply smiled and started talking, he kept motioning at her and then at his truck, but she clearly did not like what he was saying so she shook her head and tried to step away. However, the man grabbed her arm and kept talking.

"I think he is offering her a ride…" Tori said "But I don't think she wants to pay the price"

They saw her trying to pull her arm back, but he kept holding it and trying to drag her to his truck, so she kicked him between his legs and he let go of her as he leaned down in pain.

"Yes!" Cat exclaimed and Jade simply turned to the side to talk to her mother, she seemed to be having an argument, so they just looked at each other sadly. It was hard to see her talking to the air as if it were an actual person.

Jade was distracted so the man stood up and held her arm again, so she grabbed the gun and when he turned her around, she was aiming it at him, so their eyes wide opened "Oh god" Mr. West said and the man let go of her nervously.

"Just go, go…" Ana whispered.

Jade was aiming the gun at the man but then they saw her talking to her mother again and he took that moment of distraction to take the pistol from her hand, so she stared at him terrified "Oh god, no, no…" Tori said scared.

The man simply took out all the bullets and shook his head upset as he walked towards her, so Jade walked back but then he hit her face with the pistol and she dropped on the grass "Bastard" Beck said angrily and they watched the man grabbing her neck and making her stand up, he said some things to her and threw the gun away.

"Just leave her alone" Ana said to the screen in impotence, but the man was dragging Jade towards his vehicle while she unsuccessfully tried to resist it. He simply smashed her against the side of the truck and kept talking to her, he spoke for a couple of minutes while she just listened and tried to get his hand off her neck.

The man stepped back and Jade stood there staring at him nervously, then she looked at her mother and shook her head scared, but he simply smiled and gently removed her jacket. Jade wasn't really doing anything at that point, she was just staring at him terrified, so everyone's hearts broke, she looked so helpless and it seemed she'd finally given in.

"Please don't tell me he…" Ana said to Mr. West but he shrugged.

"I don't know" He said and they saw the man holding Jade's hand again, he pulled it to make her walk to the back of the truck but she resisted it and shook her head, so he rolled his eyes and grabbed her neck again. They watched Jade trying to fight him but it was useless, he dragged her to the back until they lost sight of them and everyone knew what would happen there.

"No, no, no…" Beck said in anger and frustration "This can't be happening" He added.

The footage remained the same with a few cars passing by the truck and a few minutes later the man got in the front seat again, he opened the passenger's door from inside and they saw Jade walking towards her things, holding her shirt to close it, stroking her hurt neck and looking down, she simply leaned down to grab her backpack and jacket from the grass and they saw her wiping her tears away.

Jade stared into space, which they imagined was where Lorraine was supposed to be, and she nodded as she put her jacket back on, then she slowly walked towards the truck and got in the front seat with him before he drove away.

"Oh my god" Ana said with tears in her eyes.

"Well, now we know why she disappeared so quickly" Andre said sadly, and Beck looked down trying to control his own emotions.

"That bastard raped her, he realized she was ill and he just…" Tori said upset.

"We need to find her and we need to do it now" Beck said anxiously "She is all alone and she is in danger"

"Do you know anything else?" Ana asked Mr. West.

"They just texted me that they believe she is in New York" He informed.

"That's like across the country, how did she get there?" Tori commented.

"Yeah, well…she took some rides" Mr. West said and Beck looked down mortified.

"I don't mean to sound insensitive, but Jade has nothing except her body to survive, I think you should tell your people to look for her in night clubs" Andre commented and they all looked at him.

"What are you saying? That Jade is a stripper again?" Beck asked.

"She's been there before and she has nothing, I'm just trying to step into her shoes" Andre responded. "We know she hates it but if it's her only way to survive, then chances are she is doing it"

"She wouldn't go back to that, right?" Tori asked.

"We know how she paid for her trip, she wasn't happy to do it but she did it anyway and in comparison, I think stripping might come a little easier" Andre said and Beck shook his head upset.

"That was different, it was rape" Tori insisted.

"I know, I'm not saying she'd be doing it for fun, but she needs to eat" Andre commented.

"He is right" Ana said and took a breath in resignation as Mr. West looked down "Jade has only ever worked as a stripper and she wouldn't have many options to get money, chances are she went back to that"

"That's so…sad" Cat admitted.

"It is but it's also the biggest possibility" Andre added and Beck sighed as he looked down because he knew they were right, which just made him feel worse.

"I'll let my people know" Mr. West simply said.

Jade finished her shift of the night at 4am and Dexter saw her walking home, so he decided to give her a ride, he wanted to help but he also wanted to know more about her and that was a perfect opportunity.

"So, this is where you live?" He asked as they walked upstairs past a few junkies.

"It's what I can afford" Jade said and he nodded, she opened the door of her room and let him walk in first so he did and then she closed the door.

"Mom, we have a visitor" Jade said and Dexter looked around because he expected her to come out of the bathroom but Jade walked straight to the bed and sat down on it, she smiled to her side and then at Dexter. "Mom, this is my boss Dexter, he wanted to meet you" She said and he stared at her confused.

"Are you joking?" He asked and laughed, but she looked at him disconcertedly.

"Joking about what? This is my mom" Jade said coldly, and his smile dropped, he didn't know how to respond.

"He seems nice" Lorraine said and Jade nodded as she smiled at her, Dexter simply looked to the side confused and then smiled awkwardly.

"I think I should get going, see you tomorrow" He said and she nodded.

"Bye" Jade said and he left the room "Did he seem weird to you?" She asked.

"I think he was tired, hon, it's late" Lorraine said.

"Yeah, probably" She simply responded and took a pill "I'm gonna sleep now" she informed and laid down next to her mother.

"Sweet dreams, my love"

Next day Jade showed up at work as she did every day and Dexter approached her, he was still confused by what had happened in her room, but he needed to know more to decide what he would do with her. He knew that having a mentally ill girl working as a stripper would not make him look good if, for any reason, the police got involved.

"Allie, did you sleep well?" He asked.

"Yeah, you left quickly" She commented.

"I was tired" Dexter responded "So, how is your mom?"

"She is fine…?" Jade said slightly confused

"You said it's just the two of you, right?" He questioned.

"Yes, I told you before" She responded annoyed

"And where did you live before?" Dexter asked "I mean, it's kind of obvious you are new to the city, you live in a hotel"

"California" Jade simply said

"And why did you leave?" He asked.

"I needed a fresh start" She responded emotionlessly and he nodded "Why are you asking all these questions now?"

"I'm just curious" Dexter said "Anyway, it's almost time for your show and I have to take care of some things, I'll be in my office" He informed but she ignored him, she only drank a glass of whisky and walked backstage to get ready.

Dexter went to his computer and the first thing he did was google her name, but he didn't get any results, so he searched for missing people in California in the last few weeks. He didn't really know if he expected to get any results, but he needed to be sure. It was clear that she wasn't okay and he had a hunch that she was hiding from something.

"There you are" Dexter said when he found her photo on a missing people website and took a breath "Jade West, eighteen, Los Angeles" He read and stared at the screen debating what to do, he wanted her to stay at the club but he knew it wasn't okay and once he googled he name, he realized there were a lot of people looking for her and he didn't want them to trace her back to him. He had to let her go.

Mr. West arrived in Lorraine's house and found Jade's friends there as well, they'd been trying to find her with no results as usual "I found her" He informed.

"What?" Ana immediately asked and they all stood up.

"Well, I didn't find her, someone told me where she is" Mr. West clarified.

"And? Where is she?" Beck questioned.

"New York City" He informed "She is working at a nightclub, as you suspected, and her employer contacted me, apparently he realized she has a…condition" He explained and they sighed.

"Thank god" Ana commented.

"Yeah, thank god he is decent" Andre added "Someone else might've taken advantage of that"

"So, now what?" Robbie asked.

"We go get her, of course" Ana said.

"Yes, I've made the arrangements and we'll be all flying in a couple of hours, this is a one-day trip so need to do anything else" Mr. West explained.

"You mean you paid for our flights?" Ana asked.

"I figured Jade would be more comfortable coming with you all" He explained emotionlessly and looked down, the truth was he felt ashamed of his behavior towards her and it was too late to fix it.

"Thanks…" Tori said awkwardly and he nodded.

They all went to New York a few hours later and arrived early in the morning, they'd arranged a meeting with Dexter at the club and he was waiting for them right outside.

"Hello, I'm Dexter" He said politely as he shook Mr. West's hand and smiled at Ana and the gang.

"Jade works here?" Cat asked as he looked at the place.

"Yes, but she told me her name was Allie and that she was 22 years old" Dexter explained.

"And you just believed her?" Beck asked coldly.

"Beck…" Andre whispered as he elbowed him.

"Listen kid, she looks the part and she told me she had experience as a stripper, which she proved on her first night and I'm a businessman, I saw talent and I hired her" Dexter explained "Now I know I shouldn't have taken her word for it but I didn't have reasons to think she was lying"

"You don't have to apologize, thank you for calling" Ana said.

"How did you realize she is sick?" Tori asked curiously.

"I gave her a ride home two days ago and I…well, I met her mother" Dexter said still confused by the incident, so they looked at each other.

"It's a lot to take in, we know" Robbie said.

"Yeah, well…she looked normal, so I was not expecting her to start talking to the wall" He responded.

"And what did you do? Did you tell her?" Ana asked.

"I thought she was joking at first, but she seemed pretty serious, so I just said I was tired and left, what else could I do?" He commented "And then last night I talked to her and she told me she came from California, so I googled missing people and voila!" He explained.

"So, you know where she lives" Andre said.

"Yeah, it's a hotel nearby, she must be there right now" Dexter said.

"Let's go then"

They all walked to Jade's hotel, which was nearby, and Dexter led them to her floor; the place was horrible, there were alcohol bottles in the hall and some drugs on the floor, they also found some hungover people and some hookers on their way out as they made their way upstairs, so they looked at each other concernedly. That wasn't the best environment for Jade given her condition and her addiction precedents.

"This is it" Dexter said when they were outside her door and they took a breath, they were nervous and anxious to see her.

"Whom do you think she should see first?" Dexter asked.

"Ana?" Tori asked.

"I don't know, she was pretty mad at me" Ana said and looked at Beck "I think you should be the one she sees, you're her boyfriend" She commented and he nodded.

"Okay" Beck simply said and stood in front of the door, he took a breath and knocked. A few seconds later the door opened and they expected to see Jade, but it wasn't her, it was a tall shirtless man.

"May I help you?" He asked and they looked at him confused but then they saw Jade inside the room, she was on her knees next to the nightstand and they saw her snorting something off of it so their eyes wide opened. There was no question about it, she had fallen into her addiction again.

"Who is it?" Jade asked as she wiped her nose and stood up, she hadn't turned around but they saw she was wearing short shorts and no shirt, she only had her bra and a very loose open sweater that was falling off her shoulders. The bed was messed up and the guy in front of them was barely dressed as well, so they knew what had happened, but they didn't understand why.

"I don't know, babe, come see yourself" The man said and stepped aside so she saw them and her calm face immediately changed. Beck hadn't even said a word, he was just staring at her shocked.

"What are you doing here?" Jade asked confused.

"You know these people?" The guy asked as he walked towards her and she looked at him and then back at them nervously.

"What's happening here?" Beck asked coldly and the gang looked at each other.

"I think it's pretty obvious" Jade simply said and chuckled.

"Who are they?" The guy asked as he put his arm around her hips and she got closer to him.

"Just people I used to know" Jade said.

"Step away from her" Mr. West ordered the man but Jade only laughed.

"It's been a long time, Mr. West" She said "What makes you think you can talk to my friend like that?" She asked.

"What are you doing?" Ana questioned disconcertedly and Jade rolled her eyes.

"Don't even talk to me, you traitor" She responded coldly.

"What are they doing here?" The man asked as he grabbed a beer for himself and one for Jade.

"They're not here for me, they're here for Jade" Jade commented and drank from the bottle.

"Very funny" Her father said annoyed "Get dressed now, we are leaving" He informed and she laughed.

"You can't make me do anything" Jade affirmed.

"What is she doing?" Tori whispered.

"I don't know" Ana said sincerely, they hadn't expected that reaction from her.

"What are you doing?" Beck asked coldly and upset.

"What's the matter, handsome? You need a hug?" Jade asked cynically as she walked towards him and he looked at her confused "That comes at a price too, darling" she added.

"But it's worth it" The man commented and kissed her neck from behind as he put his hand on her waist, so she smiled "Anyway, I'll leave you with your friends, see you soon" He said to her and left.

"I'm leaving too, I'm sorry about this" Dexter said to Ana and she nodded.

"Well, now that your friend is gone, care to explain what the hell just happened?" Beck asked clearly angry and she laughed.

"I think you all need to go" Jade responded as she sat down on a chair and started smoking a cigarette calmly. She looked like a completely different person and it'd only been a few weeks, so they were disconcerted.

"We are not leaving without you" Ana informed.

"Stop the act, you're here for Jade but she isn't leaving with you either" Jade responded.

"Wait…what?" Tori asked confused.

"What you heard, sweetie, Jade and I are doing just fine and we don't need you to come disturb our life" She commented and they looked at each other.

"Jade…?" Andre said confused.

"Yeah, I know you're here for her, but she is my daughter and I don't want you to come near her again" Jade commented and they looked at her even more disconcertedly, they didn't understand what she was saying but everything was starting to click, her behavior wasn't her own, it was a copy of Lorraine's.

"Where is Jade right now?" Beck asked to confirm what they already suspected.

"She went out to get some food, but she'll be back soon and I don't you to disturb her" Jade said coldly "She is doing just fine without you, so leave us alone"

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	17. Chapter 17

"So, leave us alone" Jade said.

"Oh my god" Tori whispered shocked

"This isn't happening" Beck said as he covered his face.

"It is, now get out before she comes back, you'll just upset her" Jade affirmed.

"Lorraine, why are you doing this? Jade said you'd changed" Ana commented and Jade looked at her annoyed.

"Don't you even talk to me, you stole my daughter and tried to turn her against me" She responded "But she is fine now, we are together as a family and she doesn't need you anymore"

"What were you doing with that man?" Ana asked sadly.

"I'm doing what I have to do to help my child, we are a team" Jade affirmed and Beck shook his head at the floor, it was devastating to see her like that.

"You think Jade wants you to trade sex for money?" Ana asked

"She doesn't have to know it, but what she makes at the club is not a lot, so I decided to start helping, she's done enough as it is and I've done this before anyway, at least now she gets benefis from it too" Jade said sadly and looked down, so they looked at each other mortified, it was so heartbreaking to hear her.

Jade really believed Lorraine loved her and wanted the best for her, she'd made her a loving supportive mother in her mind and she was acting it out. They hadn't seen that facet of her illness before, so it shocked them but it also made sense, her mind had to come up with ways to keep up the lie and protect itself from more suffering.

"How about we help you both?" Mr. West.

"Now that's a surprise" Jade said sarcastically "Since when do you care about me or your daughter?" she asked.

"It might be hard to believe, but I don't like the thought of my daughter ending up as a stripper, Lorraine" Mr. West said.

"Jade is fine without you, so just leave and forget we ever existed" Jade demanded.

"No, that's not happening" Her father said as he stepped towards her, so she chuckled.

"You miss me, don't you darling?" Jade asked and smiled as she got closer to him "I bet your new wife doesn't make you as happy as I did" She said and stroked his face, so he pushed her back gently.

"That's enough" He said coldly and Jade stepped away annoyed.

"Guess I misread that, you still don't care" She responded disappointedly

"Come with us, you and Jade" He demanded.

"Get out, Jade is an adult and she doesn't want to go with you" Jade affirmed.

"I want to hear her say it" Beck said and Jade rolled her eyes.

"What are you even doing here?" She asked.

"Jade is my girlfriend" He informed, it was so bizarre for him to talk to her about herself in third person.

"You don't seriously expect me to believe you're really into her, do you? I mean, come on…she is a stripper, no guy wants that kind of girlfriend" Jade commented and Beck sighed sadly, he knew that's how she felt deep inside about their relationship.

"You don't know me" He said "She is my girlfriend and I love her"

"Sorry honey, she chose me" Jade said and took a breath calmly "But you can wait for her, she'll tell you herself"

"Okay then, we will" Ana said and the gang looked at each other, they didn't know how long that would take.

"In the meantime, I'll go get some fresh air" Jade said and walked out of the room.

"We have to follow her" Beck said.

"She is worse than I remembered" Tori admitted.

"Well…she's been alone, I guess that made it worse" Andre said.

"I'll go after her, we can't lose her" Beck said and rushed out of the room, she was walking calmly so he caught up to her quickly and simply observed her. She stepped out of the building and lit up a cigarette, she started smoking and he watched her to make sure she stayed there, he just needed her to react, but she didn't give any signs that she would.

"Why are you spying on me?" She asked when she saw him.

"I'm just waiting for Jade to arrive" Beck said awkwardly and she rolled her eyes.

"Sure" Jade said and dropped the cigarette, she simply stepped on it and took a breath as she stared at the street. There was silence and Beck didn't know what to do, she was just standing there looking at everything but she didn't move or say anything, she was just contemplating.

A few minutes passed and then Jade's phone received a notification, so she reached into her pocket to grab it, she looked at it confused and then pressed a button to make a call, so Beck just watched her.

"Hey, what does that text mean?" Jade asked annoyed "No, you can't do that, I need the job" she said but she sounded more like herself, so Beck stared at her confused. He hadn't noticed her change, she'd just been there doing nothing.

"What the hell are you talking about? I haven't seen you today" Jade commented upset "You don't have to lie, just tell me…What do you want me to do?" She asked and then shook her head angrily "Go to hell" she said and hung up on him, she turned around to go back into the hotel and saw Beck standing there, so her eyes wide opened.

"What…what are you doing here?" Jade asked nervously and he exhaled in relief, she was back as herself.

"I came for you, we all did" He responded and smiled.

"Who's all of you?" She asked and then saw her father, her friends and Ana stepping out of the hotel, so she moved back.

"All of us" Beck repeated and she started taking little breaths to remain calm, she had not expected to see them there.

"How did you find us?" Jade asked nervously.

"Honey, why don't we go home and talk about this?" Ana asked sweetly but she shook her head.

"No, I'm fine here" She responded.

"Jade, where were you a few minutes ago?" Mr. West asked and she looked at him coldly.

"Why are you even here? Go to hell" Jade said.

"I want to know as well, where were you?" Beck asked and she thought about it, the truth was she'd just found herself standing on the sidewalk and she didn't remember why or how she'd arrived there, but she was usually so tired or high that she wasn't surprised, she'd been through that before.

"That's none of your business" Jade responded "Now go back to California and leave me alone"

"We are going back, but you're coming with us" Beck informed and she laughed as she turned around to walk away, but she saw an ambulance and three paramedics standing there so she stopped.

"What the hell is this?" Jade asked upset as she faced her friends and Beck sighed.

"Help, it's the help you need" He responded "We are going home"

The paramedics had to sedate Jade because she was freaking out and they drove her to a hospital, she needed to get the drugs out of her system and a psychiatrist had to examine her properly. By the time they were done, it was almost 11PM so the gang, Ana and Mr. West missed their flight but that wasn't the biggest problem, they needed to hear the doctor's diagnosis.

"How is Jade?" Ana asked when they saw the doctor walking to them.

"Not happy" The lady said "She demands to her mother, who, as I understand, is dead right? That's what the nurse told me" she commented.

"That's right" Beck said and she nodded.

"Well, she's been taking lots of drugs so that doesn't help but I'm assuming something else triggered this" The doctor said.

"But is she gonna be okay?" Tori asked anxiously.

"She needs to accept the truth first, so do you have proof that her mother is dead? She is delusional, but from what I got to see, she understands things…so I think the best way to approach this is to be straightforward and force her to face the facts" The doctor commented

"I have proof, I brought her death certificate and morgue file" Ana informed and she nodded.

"Well then, go ahead…"

They all went to the room and found Jade sitting on the bed staring at them coldly, she looked angry but she was restrained to the bed so she couldn't leave.

"I hope you are happy" Jade said angrily

"This is for your own good" Mr. West affirmed.

"Fuck you" She responded and looked back to Ana "Where is my mom? I want to see her now"

"You know where she is" Ana affirmed.

"Are you going to keep lying to me? I've been with her all this time, she is NOT dead" Jade responded angrily "And I'm NOT crazy, I was fine, we were fine before you found me"

"You were working at a nightclub" Beck said coldly

"It was the easiest way to make money, I've never done anything else, but I don't expect you to understand" She said annoyed

"You also started taking drugs again" Ana said sadly and Jade rolled her eyes.

"I can control it, okay? It's no big deal" She affirmed it.

"Sure you can" Beck said sarcastically "You are going back to rehab, Jade"

"No way, never" Jade said "You can't make me"

"Yes, we can" Her father informed.

"I'm eighteen, I can decide for myself" She said.

"No, you can't if you're not mentally fit to make a rational choice" He said coldly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Jade asked defensively "I'm not crazy"

"Jade, your mother is dead" Beck informed "You've been on your own all this time"

"That is ridiculous" She responded "My mom is alive and I want to see her"

"I didn't want to have to do this, honey but there's no choice, you have to face the truth" Ana said and sighed as she reached into her bag, she took out a folder and opened it for Jade to see.

"What is this?" Jade asked without looking at it.

"See for yourself" Ana responded and Jade stared at her nervously but she decided to just get it over with, she grabbed the folder and the first thing she saw was a photo of Lorraine's face with her eyes closed. The photo had been taken at the morgue and it had numbers at the bottom, which matched the ones on the death certificate under the photo.

Jade looked at the photo and the name on the certificate for a while and they could see she'd finally realized the truth, she seemed confused, scared and sad "This…this can't be real" Jade said and dropped the folder "You made it up, where is she?" she asked anxiously.

"It is, Jade, she died months ago" Ana affirmed and Jade shook her head "I went to see the apartment to tell her about you being in recovery and I found her, she had no pulse but I took her to the hospital anyway, they couldn't do anything…" she commented.

Jade just stared at her as her eyes filled with tears and she looked to the side remembering all that time she'd spent away, all the time she'd spent with her mother and she couldn't believe it had all been in her head. She was crazy, they had been right all along and she couldn't believe it. It felt surreal.

"Your doctor said you're under some meds now, that's why you can't see Lorraine anymore" Ana said but Jade remained quiet just staring into space as several tears streamed down her cheeks. It was horrible to know she had to take meds in order to function.

"I really am crazy…" Jade said scared as she stared at Ana.

"No, you're not" Tori responded nicely. "You just need help, but you'll be fine"

"This is a nightmare, this has to be a nightmare" Jade said as she held her head and then she remembered the day she'd left the city, she remembered being in the back of that truck, she remembered the driver of the bus closing the door to be alone with her inside, she remembered smiling at the man in the car at her next stop, she remembered what she'd felt all those times and the fact it all had been for nothing made her want to die.

Jade was just there crying quietly as she stared into space and embraced herself, so they didn't know what to say. They hadn't planned for that moment, they just wanted her to realize the truth but now that she had done it, they didn't know what to say.

"Jade, it's gonna be okay…" Beck said trying to make her feel better.

"No, it's not…it's never going to be okay" Jade affirmed and looked at him "Do you know what I did to get out the city?" She asked sadly but he didn't say anything "I…I had to let those men…just…" she started but she couldn't even say it and then she closed her eyes as more tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Honey, don't think about that" Ana said.

"I didn't want to do it, but my mom said…she said it was the only way and I, I just…I did it and now you tell me she wasn't there and I never had to leave but I did, I did!" Jade continued, rage and frustration dripping from her voice.

"It wasn't your fault, you weren't okay and that man forced you" Tori affirmed.

"Wait, you know about that?" She asked confused.

"We saw a tape, with the truckman…" Andre explained and Jade looked at Beck nervously, who was only looking to the side upset, he felt rage against the man but she imagined he was angry with her for cheating.

"Beck…" Jade said and he looked at her "I…I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" She said sincerely and he looked down, part of him wanted to leave because he still had a lot to process but he loved her and he knew her wellbeing came first, he couldn't let his pride get in the way.

"It's okay, don't think about that" He said nicely and she stared at him confused.

"What?" Jade asked "You…you're not upset?" She questioned.

"I just want you to be okay, please don't worry about anything else right now" Beck said gently and stroked her hand, so she looked at him with tears streaming down her face. She felt she didn't deserve him.

"I cheated on you" Jade informed "How can you be so calm? Why are you here?" She asked sadly.

"I'm here because I love you and I need you to be okay" Beck responded and she looked down.

"You shouldn't be acting like this, you should hate me" Jade affirmed ashamedly, she couldn't even make eye contact "I was a prostitute, do you understand that?" she asked and shook her head as more tears streamed down her face, so he sighed sadly.

"Love, please stop torturing yourself" Ana said "It's gonna be okay, we are together now"

"Please just leave me alone" Jade said still facing the sheets, she didn't want to look them in the eye.

"We know it's a lot to process, but you'll get better" Tori said nicely.

"Yes!" Cat exclaimed.

"Jade, please look at me" Beck said nicely but she refused to do it "Okay, we'll talk when you are ready" He added and walked out, followed by his friends.

"You need time to think, honey but you're not alone, just think about that" Ana said sweetly and kissed her head "We'll be outside"

* * *

**I'm sorry for the late update, guys, work has been insane!**

**I hope you enjoyed tho**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	18. Chapter 18

They flew back to Los Angeles and Jade was sent to a clinic so she would get the care she needed, both for her addiction and her illness. Her father paid for it, but he never went to visit so it was as it had always been: only her friends and Ana cared about her.

"How are you feeling?" Cat asked sweetly as they all sat in the living room of the clinic with her, but she was just staring at the window and shaking her foot anxiously.

"I need to get out of here" Jade said coldly.

"I know it's hard, but you've beaten the addiction before and you'll do it again" Ana affirmed.

"Easy for you to say" Jade responded angrily "This should be illegal, I'm old enough to make my own choices" she added.

"You're not thinking straight and you know it, honey" Ana said "I talked to your doctors, they say…"

"That I'm crazy, I know" Jade interrupted and took a breath to ease her nerves, she felt she was suffocating inside that room because she needed the drugs.

"No, you're not crazy" Beck clarified

"Right, because sane people see and talk to their dead mothers all the time" Jade commented sarcastically and rolled her eyes.

"You have a condition, it doesn't mean you're crazy" He responded.

"And your doctors say you've improved" Ana affirmed.

"They keep forcing me to take medication, so I guess they call that improvement, I hope you're happy" Jade said annoyed, she was just angry to be there and she wanted to get out. They knew it was her addiction talking, so they didn't really take any of her comments to heart but it was still sad for them to see her like that.

"You haven't blacked out again, have you?" Andre asked and she stared at him coldly for a few seconds, but then she looked down ashamedly.

"When?" Tori asked worriedly.

"In therapy, a few times" Jade explained "Or maybe not, maybe I imagined that too, who knows?" she added and took a deep breath as she tried to calm her anxiety.

"It's gonna be okay, love" Ana said and smiled sweetly, but Jade only wanted it to be over.

Jade stayed in the clinic for four months and then her psychiatrist allowed her to go back home under the condition that she attended her weekly sessions and took her medicine as prescribed. She'd been diagnosed with dissociative personality disorder and it'd been really hard for her to cope with it, but as time passed, she realized there had been little signs of it long before she started hallucinating her mother.

The truth was that even before she turned eighteen, Jade had experienced some blackouts, but they were isolated incidents where she'd found herself sleeping in bed or walking in a mall without knowing how she'd gotten there. Jade had felt confused about it, but she never paid too much attention to it, she imagined it was due to exhaustion and since it had only happened very few times over the years, she had never imagined it was an illness.

However, going to therapy and taking the treatment she'd been prescribed allowed her to lead a relatively normal life. Ana made sure she never missed her medication and going back home had made Jade feel a lot better, her overall mood improved because she was free and she was no longer surrounded by other patients, who made her feel she was crazy just like them.

"It's so nice to have you back" Tori said nicely.

"Thanks" Jade simply responded but she felt strange being around them again after all that time, they'd been visiting but it was different, back in the clinic they couldn't stay for too long.

"How are you feeling now that you're free?" Andre questioned.

"It's fine I guess" She said and looked down at her food, they were having lunch but she didn't feel like eating, she didn't even know if she felt like being there at all.

"You haven't seen your mom again?" Cat asked and Jade looked at her annoyed.

"I know you all think I'm crazy" She said upset "But they let me out for a reason, so stop asking me those stupid questions" she added.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" Cat started but she was cut off.

"You didn't mean to make me feel I should go back to the clinic?" Jade asked coldly.

"Take it easy, we are just trying to talk to you" Tori affirmed but Jade ignored her and simply continued playing with the fork in her salad.

"Has your dad come around again?" Andre asked to change the subject.

"No, he just sends me money to ease his guilt but it's as it has always been so…" Jade commented and then saw Beck coming to the table with a cup of coffee for her.

"Two sugars" He said nicely and she gave him a little smile, but she didn't feel comfortable around him anymore, he had been really supportive but she couldn't help to feel guilty and she was certain that he was with her out of compassion.

"Thanks" She simply said and took a sip.

"So, what has the doctor told you?" Beck asked curiously and she sighed.

"Apparently, this has to do with my childhood" Jade commented "I told you that my dad took me away from Lorraine when I was little, but I did live alone with her for years"

"How many?" Cat asked.

"Ana said it was four years, I was two when my dad left and six when he took me with him" Jade explained.

"But why did that cause you to…you know, change?" Tori asked confused.

"I was young and my therapist said I wasn't properly cared for, which makes sense since my mother spent her time drunk or high or sleeping with random men while I was locked up in a room by myself" Jade explained "He said I probably created a version of her in my mind that actually loved me and cared for me, because I had no one else"

"Oh my god, that's so sad" Cat admitted and Jade sighed.

"Well, it is what it is" She responded.

"But how come you never had any breakdown before?" Andre asked.

"He says it's probably because once I moved with my dad, I no longer had those emotional needs, I mean he always ignored me but I had a nanny who took care of me" Jade commented "So she was like my mom and I had her with me until I was fifteen, but the truth is I had blackouts before, I just never noticed them"

"What do you mean?" Beck asked curiously.

"I sometimes woke up in bed or I realized I was in a store, but I didn't remember how I got there, it happened a few times over the years" Jade admitted.

"And you didn't notice it?" Tori asked confused.

"A mental illness wasn't the first thing that came to mind" She responded annoyed "I thought I was tired or that I'd been distracted, it wasn't a big deal, but the point is the signs were there, it just wasn't so bad"

"So, you snapped because you moved back in with your mother, right?" Robbie asked and she nodded.

"Yeah, that…and the stress and the drugs, I guess, just everything" Jade said "He thinks the trigger was the night at the club…or my time in rehab or maybe before that, I don't know" She commented.

"But now that's under control, right?" Tori asked.

"I guess so, the medication helps" Jade simply said and took a breath sadly "But at the end of the day, it has no cure so it will never really end…"

Jade continued going to school and she was feeling better, she hadn't had any blackouts and she hadn't hallucinated her mother. It still felt surreal to know it all had been in her mind because her memories were vivid but being around her friends and going back to normality helped her to stay conscious and aware of her surroundings.

However, Jade didn't really know how to treat Beck, so she was distancing herself from him and he'd noticed it, he was confused but he kept trying to stay close because he loved her and he wanted their relationship to work, despite everything.

One day Jade was standing by the soda machine deciding what to get when Beck suddenly showed up behind her to scare her, so she flinched and turned around "I got ya" He said and smiled, but she simply looked back at the machine "What's the matter?" He asked confused.

"Nothing" Jade said but she didn't look at him.

"Which one do you want?" Beck asked nicely as he grabbed his wallet to pay for it.

"I…I don't know, probably none" She responded and tried to walk away but he stopped her.

"Wait, where are you going?" He questioned confused.

"Class" She said coldly and he sighed.

"Jade, what's happening? Why are you pushing me away?" Beck asked and she looked at him emotionlessly.

"I have class, Beck" Jade said and tried to walk away again but he grabbed her hand and took her into the janitor's closet.

"Class can wait" He said "We need to talk, I know these past few months have been horrible for you, but I don't understand why you keep pushing me away, what have I done? Why are you doing this?" Beck asked sincerely.

"You know perfectly well why" Jade said.

"No, I don't" He responded "I've been trying to be there for you, but you don't let me"

"This isn't about you" She commented.

"Then what is it?" Beck asked and Jade looked down.

"You know what I did, Beck, you know how I got out of the city and Cat told me how you found me" She responded and he immediately understood, he hadn't thought she'd be the one to step back because of that "I was a prostitute"

"No" He immediately said.

"I traded sex for favors and money, that's the definition of prostitution" She responded coldly.

"You were ill, Jade, you had no control over it" He affirmed and she sighed.

"Maybe when I thought I was Lorraine…but not when I took the rides" Jade admitted as her eyes filled with tears and she looked down ashamedly.

"What?" Beck asked confused.

"I knew what I was doing, I thought Lorraine was there and she told me to do it and I was scared but I did it anyway and if she never existed, then that means I told myself to do it" Jade explained and more tears streamed down her cheeks but he shook his head.

"No, listen to me" He said and held her face gently "I saw the tape, I saw what happened and you did not do it willingly" Beck affirmed "That bastard saw you talking to no one and he realized you were ill, he took advantage of that because you were alone and you were an easy prey, you did not agree to it and I'm sure the same happened with others, so you don't have to feel guilty about it" He commented and she looked at him disconcertedly.

"I cheated on you, Beck, I betrayed you!" Jade exclaimed.

"No, you didn't" He affirmed "You didn't have the ability to make a rational choice because you weren't okay" He commented as he wiped her tears away "Is that why you've pushed me away? You thought I was angry with you?"

"You have the right to be" She responded but he only smiled and shook his head.

"I could never blame you for something you had no control over" Beck said and she stared at him surprised "I love you and I just want you to be okay, I want us to be okay, I want us to be like before" He said and pushed some hairs behind her ear.

"I don't think that's a good idea" She admitted as she stepped back and he looked at her confused.

"Why not?" He asked

"Even if you're not mad about what I did, I'm mentally ill, Beck, do you know understand that? Do you realize what it means?" Jade asked as a tear streamed down her cheek.

"Of course I do" Beck said but she shook her head.

"No, you don't…I have to take medication every single day, I have to keep a diary of everything I do to make sure I'm not missing any time, I have to do memory exercises, I have to do many things I didn't do before…" She commented sadly.

"I know that, Jade and I don't care, you're still you" He affirmed.

"Am I? Really?" She asked and looked to the side "I don't feel that, I don't feel I'm the same person I was before all of this happened and it's not your responsibility to take care of me" She commented and he shook his head.

"No, it's not" Beck said and she nodded "And it's not necessary, you're taking fantastic care of yourself now, you're doing so much better and I'm really proud of you" He added with a little smile.

"Yeah, but if things changed…" Jade said.

"If things changed, then I would gladly take care of you, because I love you" Beck affirmed and she stared at him shocked, she had not expected that reaction from him after everything "I know I might've given you reasons to doubt my feelings in the past, but I mean it, I love you and I want to be with you, I don't care how"

"Really?" Jade asked incredulously, she didn't know what to think.

"Yes" Beck responded sharply and held her hands "I want us to be happy again, I know we can"

"I wouldn't be so sure…" She admitted.

"I love you and I know you love me, so let's just leave all this behind us" He said

"I can't leave who I am behind" Jade said upset "I wish I could, but nothing will ever erase what I did and what I am"

"What happened is not who you are" Beck affirmed "And your illness isn't either, you're so much more than that" He added and she looked down.

"Do you really mean all of this? Or are you just saying it because you feel bad for me?" Jade asked sincerely but he simply smiled and kissed her sweetly, so she closed her eyes and kissed him back.

"I mean it, I love you" Beck said as he broke the kiss and wiped her tears away again "So please, stop being so stubborn" He added and she chuckled, so he kissed her again and then they hugged.

"I love you too" Jade said as they hugged and he broke the hug to kiss her again, then he opened the door and of the closet and held her hand, she simply took a breath and he smiled at her.

"Now we can go to class"

* * *

**THE END!**

**I hope you guys enjoyed the story, sorry for the last late updates.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Also, I'm kind of busy right now so I probably won't post another story for a while but please DO give me ideas for when I get the time to write! :)**


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